Post by MYŌJIN on Jan 7, 2021 23:15:44 GMT -5
It's 2021.
New year, new me is the saying right? How many off us really follow that when we say it? How many of us actually go through with changing into a new person? ...Now answer me. How many just end up being the same the year before, and the year before that, et cetera..
Yeah, I'm sure you get my point.
2020 did not end exactly the way I wanted to. I found myself growing into a shell, pushing away others, becoming bitter and losing myself more and more. I even started to push away my partner and best friend, Zane. Unbreakable Resolution, ironically, had broken me. I didn't win the tag titles with Zane, we didn't fulfill the promise we made- and that still weighs heavy on my heart and mind. It still hurts to think about- after all, I was the one who was pinned. I kept telling myself I failed us. I failed her…
Then I went to war with Colton Saint, and I was the one left standing- but after the brutal fight that it was, I didn't feel the same. I felt horrified at the lengths I went to keep him down. I felt ashamed that the night didn't go the way I planned.
In short, I started becoming a whiny bitch who would rather drink his problems away with a piña colada than actually deal with them.
Then the New Year came in, and I don't think I had ever felt more miserable in my life. What can I say? I wasn't a Shining Star, I was a brooding loser.
I didn't do anything in Project: Honor that I set out to do last year. After some people talked to me, did their best to cheer me up, I began to feel better. I felt revigorated. Thinking now that 2021 could be my year.
Then I lost my Territorial Championship on my last match in Wrestleworld.
Strangely enough, this didn't set me back into that depression.
It only made me feel even more motivated.
Motivated to keep trying. Motivated to keep struggling and fighting, even if it's vain. Until I get what I want. Until I reach my dream. Until I go from the underdog to the face of Project: Honor. Until I make this uphill battle worth something… Worth my time and effort. Worth the blood, sweat, and tears that I've poured into this sport again and again… and I have a chance to do just that.
The Legacy Gauntlet. Another chance at a title. Will I end up as a choke artist again? Maybe. Is that going to deter me from trying?
Nope. Not even a little bit.
Kat Jones, I've never heard of you before. I've never wrestled you before. I don't know how skilled you are. I don't know your capabilities as a wrestler or your accolades.
But it won't be enough to stop me from getting into that gauntlet match. No matter what the stipulation for our fight will be.
I've been put down so many times already. I've considered quitting and walking away, taking my ball and going on- but my stubbornness refuses to allow quitting to be an option. Kat, I'm sure you're a great wrestler- and one day, I'd love to face you again in a friendly one-on-one.
But right now, this match matters everything to me- and I have to do everything in my power to win it. I HAVE to beat you. There's no way I can allow myself to lose again.
You're a newcomer in Project: Honor being handed a big chance. I'm a starving competitor staring at the opportunity to right so many wrongs that happened last year.
I'm not lying when I say new year, new me.
Things will be different.
I will be a better wrestler than last year.
Just fucking watch me.
New year, new me is the saying right? How many off us really follow that when we say it? How many of us actually go through with changing into a new person? ...Now answer me. How many just end up being the same the year before, and the year before that, et cetera..
Yeah, I'm sure you get my point.
2020 did not end exactly the way I wanted to. I found myself growing into a shell, pushing away others, becoming bitter and losing myself more and more. I even started to push away my partner and best friend, Zane. Unbreakable Resolution, ironically, had broken me. I didn't win the tag titles with Zane, we didn't fulfill the promise we made- and that still weighs heavy on my heart and mind. It still hurts to think about- after all, I was the one who was pinned. I kept telling myself I failed us. I failed her…
Then I went to war with Colton Saint, and I was the one left standing- but after the brutal fight that it was, I didn't feel the same. I felt horrified at the lengths I went to keep him down. I felt ashamed that the night didn't go the way I planned.
In short, I started becoming a whiny bitch who would rather drink his problems away with a piña colada than actually deal with them.
Then the New Year came in, and I don't think I had ever felt more miserable in my life. What can I say? I wasn't a Shining Star, I was a brooding loser.
I didn't do anything in Project: Honor that I set out to do last year. After some people talked to me, did their best to cheer me up, I began to feel better. I felt revigorated. Thinking now that 2021 could be my year.
Then I lost my Territorial Championship on my last match in Wrestleworld.
Strangely enough, this didn't set me back into that depression.
It only made me feel even more motivated.
Motivated to keep trying. Motivated to keep struggling and fighting, even if it's vain. Until I get what I want. Until I reach my dream. Until I go from the underdog to the face of Project: Honor. Until I make this uphill battle worth something… Worth my time and effort. Worth the blood, sweat, and tears that I've poured into this sport again and again… and I have a chance to do just that.
The Legacy Gauntlet. Another chance at a title. Will I end up as a choke artist again? Maybe. Is that going to deter me from trying?
Nope. Not even a little bit.
Kat Jones, I've never heard of you before. I've never wrestled you before. I don't know how skilled you are. I don't know your capabilities as a wrestler or your accolades.
But it won't be enough to stop me from getting into that gauntlet match. No matter what the stipulation for our fight will be.
I've been put down so many times already. I've considered quitting and walking away, taking my ball and going on- but my stubbornness refuses to allow quitting to be an option. Kat, I'm sure you're a great wrestler- and one day, I'd love to face you again in a friendly one-on-one.
But right now, this match matters everything to me- and I have to do everything in my power to win it. I HAVE to beat you. There's no way I can allow myself to lose again.
You're a newcomer in Project: Honor being handed a big chance. I'm a starving competitor staring at the opportunity to right so many wrongs that happened last year.
I'm not lying when I say new year, new me.
Things will be different.
I will be a better wrestler than last year.
Just fucking watch me.