Post by CallMeRobert on Mar 11, 2022 13:28:18 GMT -5
Black screen
MARSHALL GREENE V/O: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of ALL ages! We’ve seen many things happen in our first three shows. What can happen tonight? My name is Marshall Greene AND THIS IS PURSUIT…OF…THEEEEEEE…RIIIIIIING!!!
♫Ladies and Gentlemen, please
Would you bring your attention to me?♫
No longer a blank screen, our view is an aerial shot of North Brother Island in New York City, New York.
♫For a feast for your eyes to see,
An explosion of catastrophe.♫
The obvious drone begins to zip around the structures to be used for Episode six. The trivia set, the Dizzy Dummy, and the Putt-Putt course.
♫Like nothing you’ve ever seen before,
Watch closely as I open this door.♫
We zip around Paul Quinton, the Host of Pursuit Of The Ring, standing outside the entrance to the main building of the show.
♫Your jaws will be on the floor,
After this you’ll be begging for more.♫
He cheeses at the camera as it gets closer to him.
♫Welcome to the show♫
Paul pulls back and smacks the drone, causing it to begin spinning and the screen blacks out.
♫Please come inside♫
We cut to clips from the last show’s matches, starting off with Hudson crashing into Tibaggu and Jobber Joe, sending them both over the ropes with a double clothesline.
♫LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!!♫
Cut to show Brunhilde Leichenberg setting Lena Soulas up for an ‘Eisenpfeil’, only to accidentally kick Chelsea Kennedy in the face with Lena’s boots.
♫BOOM! (DO YOU WANT IT?)♫
After that, TJ Thompson running into Brunhilde, causing her to drop Lena.
♫BOOM! (DO YOU NEED IT?)♫
Next we see Jakeem Kobra hitting Jasiah Andrew Scott with the ‘Silent Killer’.
♫BOOM! (LET ME HEAR IT?)♫
Followed by a shot of Kit Darling and Hailey Storm staring each other down.
♫LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!♫
Trailed by a shot of Lena and TJ setting up their camping area during the Survival Challenge
♫BOOM! (DO YOU WANT IT?)♫
Then to Omar King ROCKING Hated R with a right hook during the Survival Challenge.
♫BOOM! (DO YOU NEED IT?)♫
Interrupted by Jasiah Andrew Scott and Omar King standing at the exit of the ‘Floor Is Lava’ set.
♫BOOM! (LET ME HEAR IT?)♫
Kit Darling flipping around her board to show the correct answer to win the Trivia Challenge…
♫LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!♫
…while her partner, The Narcoleptic Ninja, lay unconscious on the ground, snoring.
A new scene comes into view as we find ourselves on a three-quarter enclosed soundstage. The large ‘Pursuit Of The Ring’ logo display hangs on the background as we see a man walk onto the burnt orange empty set, dressed in a pair of dress pants and a blue dress shirt with a small picture of the head of a cottonmouth snake on the left side of the chest. He walks onto the empty side of the room and flashes a big ol’ toothy grin.
PAUL QUINTON: Thank you all for joining our SIXTH episode of Pursuit Of The Ring. We have a clusterfuck of a show today, that will make this dual pairings we’ve been trying out…seem welcome and inviting. Just like our past shows, we will place our entertainers-slash-contestants up against each other in three different challenges: A trivia challenge, a physical challenge, and a specialty challenge. The winner of each of these challenges will not only gain a point towards the final season standing…but gains an advantage later in the show, during the wrestling match portion of our little sideshow. At THAT time…everyone will be involved in a match of some sorts. The winners of the three earlier challenges will get to choose one person they would like to face one-on-one. The winner of those wrestling matches gets an additional two points, while the losers LOSE a point. As for the rest of the people who didn’t win a challenge and weren’t handpicked? Well they will face off in a large battle royal to see who gets that two point advantage AND who will receive that negative one point disadvantage.
Paul smirks.
PAUL QUINTON: But just as I was saying…let’s fuck around with things, shall we? We made teams again…but not just ANY teams…
Paul walks forward as the camera pans out. He walks up to his pedestal that is placed in the middle of the room. On each side? A long desk with seven contestants each. On the left, we have Tibaggu, Brunhilde Leichenberg, Chelsea Kennedy, Hated R, Soulas, Kobra, and Jobber Joe. On the right, Hailey Storm, Kit Darling, Hudson, Cooler TJ Thompson, The Narcoleptic Ninja, Omar King, and Jasiah Andrew Scott.
PAUL QUINTON: Tonight, our challenges will be seven on seven. But they will not be constant through the whole night. Each Challenge, a random seven will be teamed together to compete. And that all starts with our Trivia Challenge.
PAUL QUINTON: Every show we will begin with a trivia challenge for all of our contestants. Normally I will read off a question and then give the contestants time to write down an answer…but tonight…we throw ANOTHER little monkey wrench in the way things go. We are going to do this…Double Dare style. I will start by asking the question to Team Tibaggu. If they don’t know it, they can pass it on to Team Hailey. If THEY don’t know it, the question comes BACK to Team Tibaggu…where they will HAVE to answer it or suffer a point punishment. If a team answers it on the first go around, that’s one…the first Dare to the other team is worth two if the other team gets it right…and the DOUBLE dare back to the original team could net them three points if they correctly guess it. But if they get it wrong or fail to answer, the other team gets a point. The first team to FIVE points, wins the Challenge.
Paul looks to his left, at Team Tibaggu
PAUL QUINTON: Are you clowns ready?
The camera cuts to a front shot of the whole Team Tibaggu behind the desk.
TIBAGGU: I’m always down to clown, Paul.
PAUL QUINTON: Question number One! Team Tibaggu…The hero Beowulf faces a monster known by WHAT name?
No soft melody this time. Most of the team turn and begin to talk to themselves while Lena Soulas’ eyes widen, like she knows the answer. But before any discussion can really happen, Tibaggu leans down to the microphone on their desk.
TIBAGGU: I’mma Dare lil’ mama over there, to answer this question. Looking all fine and shit.
Hailey Storm rolls her eyes as everyone on Team Tibaggu looks at Tibaggu with a look of disbelief.
PAUL QUINTON: Okay…
Paul turns to Team Hailey and looks at them, only for a bo-shuriken to imbed itself in the front of his pedestal. He looks down at it, then up at Team Hailey to see The Narcoleptic Ninja pulling out a second bo-shuriken from a holder on his wrist…but he only got it halfway out before leaning over and falling asleep against Hudson.
PAUL QUINTON: Welp…anyway. Team Hailey. The hero Beowulf faces a monster known by WHAT name?
The whole of Team Hailey huddles in and begins to talk, resulting in just a small murmur being picked up from the microphone. After a few seconds, they break from their huddle and Hailey Storm leans towards the microphone.
HAILEY STORM: First off I want to say hi to my boo, Hated R. I love you, baby.
Hailey blows him a kiss, before biting her lip and playing with the bottom of her hair.
HATED R: Ya front’n, chica. Hated ain’t locked down like that, ya feel?
PAUL QUINTON: Hailey, flirting time is over, we need an answer.
HAILEY STORM: Well listen, Paul. We aren’t sure what are answer is and we don’t think they do either. Well, I’m sure Hated does, but he’s too kind of a guy to bury us that deep this early. Plus, maybe I’ll let him bury something deepe-
PAUL QUINTON: OKAY!!! Team Tibaggu? Final time. The hero Beowulf faces a monster known by WHAT name?
Tibaggu turns towards the others, who are huddling again…but leans into the microphone without consulting them.
Tibaggu: TRIPLE Dare!
All of Team Tibaggu turn and give him an odd look.
PAUL QUINTON: Tibaggu…that’s not how this works. You need to give us an answer. You get it right, you get three points. You get it wrong, Team Hailey gets a point.
Before Tibaggu or anyone else can replay, Lena Soulas leans forward to the microphone.
LENA SOULAS: GRENDEL!!!
*DING*
PAUL QUINTON: AND THAT IS CORRECT!!! Team Tibaggu with the EARLY heavy lead, three points to zero.
We cut to the interview room in the back, where we see Lena Soulas.
LENA SOULAS: Hey, SmilerZ! What a week this was for all of us. While it seems the world is going crazy, we try the best to keep you entertained. Help you escape reality, even if it’s just for a few hours during your evening. That is the point of professional wrestling. Everyone that follows my blog knows that I have a big spot for stranded animals. At home I work at a local shelter at least twice a week. It’s not much we can do, but everything counts. But since I am on the road a lot more than I used to be, I can’t do as much as I want to. So I asked Project Honors management for a little favour.
Her cheeks were glowing in excited red while she almost jumped up and down in her seat.
LENA SOULAS: There are certain superstars that love animals just as much as me. And we came to an agreement that when you buy their merchandise, a small part of that money will be donated to a local animal shelter. There will be a list of superstars that wanna help the case. I am very thankful and proud that the company has such a big heart. And of course I have high hopes that you are willing to save a life. Let’s help those that can’t help themselves.
Lena blew a kiss towards the camera.
LENA SOULAS: And always keep smiling.
We cut back to the Trivia Challenge set.
PAUL QUINTON: You know what, Lena…I’ll make you a deal. If Team Tibaggu can SWEEP this Challenge and win five points to zero over Team Hailey…I will donate my entire paycheck for this show, to a local animal shelter of your choice. Sound good?
LENA SOULAS: I would LOVE that, Paul.
PAUL QUINTON: And if you guys don’t win, I will eat a large serving of Panda Express beef & broccoli in front of the cat cages at PetSmart. NEXT QUESTION…
PAUL QUINTON: Team Hailey. It is YOUR turn to go first. Question number two: Which character in Herman Melville’s ‘Moby Dick’, was considered the voice of reason?
Hailey mouths the word ‘dick’, then bites her bottom lip again, looking directly at Hated R…before Kit Darling grabs her and forcefully turns her to stand in the huddle. All at once, they turn around, ready to give their response.
PAUL QUINTON: Hailey, what is your team’s answer?
She leans in towards the microphone.
HAILEY STORM: Dare…you know Hated R, I would do anything you dared me to.
PAUL QUINTON: On that note, Team Tibaggu, it is YOUR turn.
Tibaggu, too busy looking at Hailey Storm, doesn’t see his team huddle together…then turn around. Brunhilde pushes Tibaggu out of the way and leans into the microphone.
BRUNHILDE LEICHENBERG: DARE OF DOUBLE KIND!
PAUL QUINTON: See Hailey, THAT is how you flirt. THAT is how you get your man.
Paul pulls himself away and turns to look at Team Hailey.
PAUL QUINTON: Now this is it. Either you answer correctly, get the three points to pull in for a tie and reward ME with chowing on some chow mein in front of the chausie cats. OR you get it wrong and you give Team Tibaggu a point, possibly dooming me to go hungry for the next week because my bank account is empty.
HAILEY STORM: You know, Paul…I bet Hated R has a moby di-
PAUL QUINTON: ANSWER, PLEASE!
The lot of Team Hailey huddle together and then quickly break apart, Hudson shaking his head.
HUDSON: That’s not the answer, but go ahead. Do what you want.
Hailey leans into the microphone.
HAILEY STORM: Paul, our answer is Captain Ahab.
*BUZZER*
PAUL QUINTON: Oh, I’m sorry. That is wrong. The answer we were looking for was Starbuck.
HAILEY STORM: Um, Paul…Starbucks is a coffee shop.
PAUL QUINTON: Not Starbucks, you dimwit. Starbuck!
HUDSON: I told you. But no one listens to me.
We cut to a clip of Hudson sitting by himself for once with no Al Ian next to him.
HUDSON: You know, maybe it's just this island but I'm starting to notice something strange about my master. All those times everyone was saying he was a strange lizard man or even... an alien... I didn't believe them. However with how Al has been describing his arrival here i'm starting to question...
Al steps into the interview room.
AL IAN: Hey buddy! Ready to get started?
HUDSON: Oh, sorry master, I started without you.
AL IAN: Oh! Well that's alright I suppose. You are the contestant after all.
HUDSON: Yeah, I was just about finished anyway. We should get ready for the next competition.
AL IAN: If you say so!
We cut back to the trivia challenge set, where a flat screen monitor behind Paul shows a picture of Tibaggu with the number 4 below him and a picture of Hailey Storm with the number 0 below her.
PAUL QUINTON: And with that, Team Tibaggu gets the point and is in the lead, four points to nothin’. I can already taste the sweet and sour sauce. Let’s go to question three!
PAUL QUINTON: Team Tibaggu, this one is for you. You have the opportunity to win it all RIGHT here. Question numero tres: Who was the author of Charlotte’s Web AND Stuart Little?
Team Tibaggu huddles around, with Tibaggu inserting himself between Lena and Chelsea. After a few moments, they all break away from the group and Tibaggu leans up to the microphone.
TIBAGGU: Hey Paul, did you see that Tibaggu sandwich. I was the icing between two slices of CAKE!
PAUL QUINTON: Yeah, yeah…what’s your answer?
TIBAGGU: Um…dare.
Lena looks at Tibaggu, a shocked look on her face.
PAUL QUINTON: Okay then…
Paul turns to look at Team Hailey.
PAUL QUINTON: Team Hailey, same question. Who was the author of Charl-
Before Paul could even finish asking the question, Omar King leaned toward the microphone.
OMAR KING: E. B. White.
Everyone turned and looked at Omar, taken back that he answered so quickly.
OMAR KING: My Grams used to read me Charlotte’s Web all the time when I was just a brat.
*DING*
PAUL QUINTON: WELL THAT IS RIGHT! E.B. White wrote Charlotte’s Web in nineteen-fifty-two and Stuart Little in nineteen-forty-five. And with that, I don’t have to donate ANYTHING to the animals. Sorry, Lena. And just like that, Team Hailey is sneaking back.
We cut to the interview room, but all we can see in the shot is “King of Murder City” the man himself “Killshot” Omar King. He has a microphone in hand and looks like he means business.
OMAR KING: Bitches and bastards, ya better all be listenin’ to what imma say. None of ya put any respect on my name and imma bout done with ya shit. Imma start clockin’ ya on sight and don’t care who ya are. Once ya in my crosshairs imma shoot and imma not miss. Doesn’t matter if ya one of Hated R’s midget STD carryin’ ho’s imma still take off ya head. Get in my way and imma take ya out, imma done lettin’ ya get away with shit, every single one of ya is beneath me and imma show that and if Paul wants to keep runnin’ that sewage filled mouth of his, imma happy to permanently make sure his jaw is wired shut. PUT RESPECT ON MY NAME!!!
After that short tirade of abuse, Omar drops the microphone and flips the bird to the camera before walking off out of sight. Meanwhile we can now see behind where Omar King was standing, and Benjamin Broadwater is laying on the ground unconscious.
Cutting back to the trivia challenge set, where a flat screen monitor behind Paul shows a picture of Tibaggu with the number 4 below him and a picture of Hailey Storm with the number 2 below her.
PAUL QUINTON: Can we have someone reach out to Benjamin to see if he’s okay?
PAUL QUINTON: Sticking with Team Hailey, we move to question number four.
Paul turns towards Hailey’s side of the set.
PAUL QUINTON: Who wrote the Chronicles of Narnia?
Everyone goes to huddle together on Team Hailey, but without their knowledge…TJ steps forward to the microphone.
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: You know, sometimes there isn’t much to do around here and it’s MAD boring. But there’s this old library a couple buildings over and Narnia is there. I think of myself as a big cat in a little jungle here, so I picked it up and looked it over.
PAUL QUINTON: That’s nice, but do you have the answer?
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: C.S. Lewis.
*DING*
PAUL QUINTON: Hot damn, Team Hailey putting together a Cinderella-style comeback here!
TJ smirks as the rest of his team claps happily. We cut to the interview room.
MARSHALL GREENE: It’s time for another interview with the current leader in points, Cooler TJ. Another episode, another win, but this time it was with a partner. TJ, how did it feel to team with Lena Soulas?
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: It felt bad to help others, but I did what needed to be done. In a game like this, nobody cares about second place! They only care about the winner! When this show is all over and we get sent back to the mainland, the only person with clout is gonna be the homie with all the points. And it’s gonna be me.
MARSHALL GREENE: But didn’t she help you?
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: …Naaaaaah…I did most of the heavy lifting! I could’ve made it on my own, but she needed me! Everyone needs me. They have to! I bring so many good things to the world. They should be thanking me for my presence in their lives. Just like my dad’s lack of presence in mine…*sniff*
MARSHALL GREENE: Are…are you okay?
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: YEP!!! Just fine. Next question!
MARSHALL GREENE: Uh, here’s one from one of our viewers. Sam from Ohio asked about your plan to make it back to your own universe when this is all over.
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: Good question. To be honest, I have no clue. I’m not the science guy. That shit’s up to Gerald! Besides, I don’t know if I wanna go back quite yet. Look at me. I’m famous again! There might be another version of me stinking up the joint but other than him, this place is pretty chill.
MARSHALL GREENE: And that’s all the time we have for today! Thanks for talking with me.
We cut back to Paul and the big screen behind him. The picture of Tibaggu still has the number 4 below him, but now the picture of Hailey has the number 3 below her.
PAUL QUINTON: So here we are with question number five. I didn’t expect us to get this far, but here we are. And here is the deal. Team Tibaggu gets this question and they only need one point to win. If they pass it with a dare, Team Hailey would get two points for answering it correctly…and that is the exact number they would need to win. BUT if Team Tibaggu answers it wrong AT ALL…then we will have to go to a tie-breaker question.
Paul turns to look at Tibaggu and the rest of his team.
PAUL QUINTON: So…Team Tibaggu…question number five: The author of the Harry Potter books’ name is J.K. Rowling. What does the J.K. stand for?
With every intention of saying ‘Just Kidding’ Tibaggu leans in to talk, but Lena quickly pushes him away, her eyes wide like she knows the answer. Successfully pushing away the clown, Lena turns towards the microphone…
CHELSEA KENEDY: Joanne Kathleen.
…but Chelsea Kennedy had already stepped up to the mic.
*DING*
PAUL QUINTON: AND TEAM TIBAGGU WITH THE WALK OFF VICTORY!!!
Confetti begins to fall down onto Team Tibaggu as Lena’s face contorts to anger, directly aimed at Chelsea Kennedy for stealing her thunder.
PAUL QUINTON: Stick around folks. The Dizzy Dummy is next!
We cut to the back where we see Tibaggu laying on his side, on the floor, instead of sitting in the interview chair.
TIBAGGU: I'm surprised that it went so well, considering my ass is broken. Any of you ladies out there want to lend me your ass for the time being? I’ll treat it OH so right.
No more words. Just fade to commercial.
Back from the commercial, we see Paul Quinton standing in front of a POTR Logo, with a large monitor to his right.
PAUL QUINTON: Welcome back to the Friday show that everyone found at random, but everyone still wishes ABC’s TGIF prime time television block was back, Pursuit Of The Ring. Our Physical Challenge tonight is a simple one…Wipeout’s Dizzy Dummy. But ours will be slightly different. Instead of six at a time, we will have two spinners that spin seven people each…one for each team. And instead of spinning, one crossing the finish line, then spinning again…we will just go with whichever team gets four across first…wins the challenge! Also, in light of us starting to throw points out like their candy at a parade…for EVERYONE that crosses they finish line before the end of this challenge, they will receive an additional point. So you can earn TWO points in this challenge.
A video plays on a monitor, showing some episodes of Total Wipeout’s Dizzy Dummy for those who have never seen it.
The camera cuts to the spinners and we see all of our contestants in the spinners. Each of them with a helmet on…but we see the teams are NOT the same as the Trivia Challenge. The spinners begin to spin as we hear Paul’s voice over the scene.
PAUL QUINTON: So as you may notice…we randomly changed the teams up again. Team One…is now Team Hated…with Hated R, Hailey Storm, Chelsea Kennedy, Hudson, Jakeem Kobra, Omar King, and Brunhilde Leichenberg. Team Two…is now Team Jobber…with Jobber Joe, Kit Darling, Lena Soulas, Cooler TJ Thompson, Jasiah Andrew Scott, Narcoleptic Ninja, and Tibaggu.
The spinners start to slow down…then finally stop.
*HORN*
PAUL QUINTON: Here we go!
Everyone undoes their belts holding them to the spinner, then slowly steps away from their respective machines. Everyone, visibly dizzy, wobbles back and forth on the starting platform…heading towards the seesaws that hang above the pool. The Narcoleptic Ninja takes a step towards the seesaws…or…what he THOUGHT was the seesaw. He falls off the edge and into the water…barely making a splash as he enters the pool.
PAUL QUINTON: Big boy needs to stay away from liquids. Second week in a row he has fallen into it
Omar King, almost as if he was no longer affected, runs past everyone…hoping onto the seesaw, then onto the second one, THEN ONTO THE FINISH PLATFORM!
*DING*
PAUL QUINTON: And our FIRST one is across! Omar has earned himself a point…and he is crossing his fingers for his team to win, so he can get two points from this.
Brunhilde and Chelsea Kennedy make it to the second seesaw, but you can tell they are both dizzy as they hug the left hand of it. Suddenly Brunhilde loses her balance and falls off the side…GRABBING CHELSEA AS SHE GOES. But…no splash! Hudson had grabbed Chelsea, his teammate, and was holding onto her while holding onto the center of the seesaw. Brunhilde held on, almost touching the water. Hudson used his brute strength to pull BOTH of them up…but Brunhilde couldn’t hold on, slipping off of Chelsea and SPLASHING into the water.
PAUL QUINTON: NOOOO…wait…a wet Brunhilde? I might enjoy this.
Hudson picks Chelsea up, holding her in both outstretched arms. He runs along the seesaw and jumps…landing on the Finish Platform.
*DING*
He then places Chelsea down onto her feet.
Brunhilde, who swam back to the starting platform, emerges from the water…almost in slow motion, at least in Paul’s eyes. Her helmet had fallen off and she whips her head back, causing her wet hair to arc through the air to her back.
PAUL QUINTON: Ay, dios mio!
*DING*
*DING*
*DING*
Paul whips back around to see Jasiah Andrew Scott, Tibaggu, and Lena Soulas standing on the Finish Platform.
PAUL QUINTON: Well pardon me. While I was being mesmerized by beauty, three members of Team Jobber have crossed the line and we now sit at three-all! THe next team to get a player across is the winner.
Hailey and Hated R are both in the water, with Hated R swimming around the pool…trying to get AWAY from Hailey as she swims after him.
Jakeem Kobra stands at the Starting Platform…keeping his locked on Tibaggu, trying to make sure he doesn’t come ANYWHERE close to him (Even if Tibaggu was already done and just standing at the end).
Jobber Joe had ventured AWAY from the set and had found some flowers starting to grow on North Brother Island. He was down on his knees with his face buried in them.
Cooler TJ had just popped back up out of the water at the start.
Kit Darling though, slightly afraid of the open water, carefully inched her way across the second seesaw.
PAUL QUINTON: I'm actually surprised Kit Darling is here after just giving birth not too long ago. The staff have already had to chase Tibaggu away from her room multiple times as he keeps on saying he is craving some milk…
Kit inches to the edge…stands up…AND JUMPS!!!
*DING*
*HORN*
*BUZZER*
PAUL QUINTON: AND TEAM JOBBER WINS THE PHYSICAL CHALLENGE!!! Remember, everyone who reached the Finish Platform…Omar King, Hudson, Chelsea Kennedy, Jasiah Andrew Scott, Tibaggu, Lena Soulas, AND Kit Darling…all get a point. THEN, Team Jobber…Jobber Joe, Darling, Soulas, Cooler TJ Thompson, Scott, Sleepy Ninja, and Tibbs all get a point. So Darling, Soulas, Scott, and Tibaggu are all getting TWO points out of this challenge.
The scene cuts to the interview room where we are greeted by a smiling Lena Soulas.
LENA SOULAS: I will tell you guys, it seems those challenges become crazier every show. But hey, who am I to complain? Exactly. They are good fun, even though some try their best to make them awkward. I am the type that sees something positive in everything and everyone. Even someone like Brunhilde.
Lena stops for a brief moment, a small giggle escaping her.
LENA SOULAS: But that is another story for another day. I am overjoyed that I could manage to win one of those challenges. It is not easy, especially when the competition is that tough. Some of them probably watched every episode of every game show out there. I would say I have seen one or two myself. And if not then Tank has. We are what you would call nerds. And while that was an insult back in my childhood, it isn’t any longer. Week in and week out I will give it my best. But not only for me, but for all of you. My SmileZ army. You are the ones that motivate me to go that extra mile. And tonight the odds were in our favour. So POTR… keep it coming!
Coming back from the commercial break, we find ourselves looking at Paul Quinton standing in front of a small shack with a window on the front. Leaning down and hanging partially out of the window with their arms resting on the seal, is one of the owners of Project: Honor, Christian DeMarco.
PAUL QUINTON: The final challenge of the night, our Putt-Putt challenge. But I will not be describing this leisure sport, I will let one of the big boss men do it for me. Take it away, Mr. DeMarco.
CHRISTIAN DeMARCO: Thanks, Paul. So here is the deal. Our contestants have three holes of putt-putt to play. But instead of winning based on their own performance, we…again…have placed them in teams of seven. First up, we have Team Kennedy…Chelsea Kennedy, Jobber Joe, Tibaggu, Kit Darling, Jasiah Andrew Scott, Hailey Storm, and Omar King. Then we have Team Leichenberg…Brunhilde Leichenberg, Jakeem Kobra, Cooler TJ Thompson, Lena Soulas, Hated R, Hudson, and Narcoleptic Ninja. The team with the lowest score at the end of those three holes, wins the challenge.
Christian slightly adjusts how he is leaning into the window.
CHRISTIAN DeMARCO: Now, if they win the challenge, of course they get the one point each as a team. But there are ways to earn EXTRA points in this little game. First off, hole three…if you ace it and get a hole in one, you get three extra points. And then if you have the BEST score of the whole game, you get an extra FIVE points. So someone has the ability to earn nine points off of this challenge. That could really throw the whole point standings for a loop.
Our view cuts to show the first hole.
PAUL QUINTON: Now our contestants already completed the first hole…a par three…and boy was it interesting.
The view cuts to clips of the contestants playing putt-putt.
Brunhilde Leichenberg hits the ball from the bottom of the hill, banking it off the wall and into the cup. A number 2 appears in the bottom right corner of the screen.
Chelsea Kennedy hits the ball lightly into the cup. A number 3 appears.
Jakeem Kobra with a well placed original putt that puts him on top of the hill, then a tap in. A number 2 appears.
Jobber Joe also hits from the bottom of the hill, but he chips it and it goes into the cup without touching anything else. A number 2 appears.
Cooler TJ Thompson hits from the start. The ball perfectly lines up, goes up the hill, sinks into the cup. We watch him dance around as the number 1 appears.
Tibaggu is seen having a bit of trouble getting up the hill, before getting it up to the top and sinking it. The number 4 appears.
Lena Soulas, light tap in…but her shoulders are slumped. A number 4.
Kit Darling sinking the putt, but slightly hobbling off the hole. 3.
Hated R hitting the ball and tossing his club in celebration, with his hands out to the side. The putt doesn’t sink, but instead bounces off the wall. Hated R is forced to go knock it in. 2.
Jasiah Andrew Scott lightly bounces the ball off a wall. 2
Hudson hits the ball too hard and the ball goes FLYING off the course…automatic disqualification. 5.
Hailey Storm kept looking off to the side at Hated R, not paying much attention to her hits. 4.
Narcoleptic Ninja pulled the club back…and collapsed onto the green mid swing, snoring. The clip also included Christian DeMarco having to duck out of the way as the Ninja had released the club as he fell asleep and it went crashing through the shack window. Automatic disqualification. 5.
Omar King strutted his stuff as he chipped the ball into the cup. 2.
PAUL QUINTON: So after the first hole, Cooler TJ was leading the pack with the lowest score. And Team Kennedy was leading the way with a score of twenty to twenty-one. Now, we also had them complete the second hole too. Why sit through the boring stuff when you can get STRAIGHT to the drama, right?
An image of the second hole appears.
Chelsea Kennedy hits the ball in, but it leaves a trail of water behind it…so you can tell she had accidently dipped it into the little river on the hole. The number 4 appears in the bottom right corner.
Brunhilde Leichenberg takes the long way around, going around the bend…but sinks the long putt. The number 2 appears, but now also has a 4 in parenthesis, showing off her total score.
Jobber Joe continues his putt-putt excellence, sinking the ball with a chip shot. 2 (4).
Jakeem Kobra can be seen accidently singing his ball in the mini-river for the fifth time in a row. Automatic disqualification due to maximum strokes. 5 (7).
Tibagguis has a bit more trouble, having issues with the little hills, but finally sinks it. 4 (8).
Cooler TJ Thompson chips the ball OVER the river and almost makes another hole-in-one, but just misses. He is forced to tap it in from a few inches away. 2 (3).
Kit Darling having a bit of an issue after she slightly twisted her ankle on the first hole. 4 (7).
Lena Soulas, doing slightly better than she did the first time. 3 (7).
Jasiah Andrew Scott with another light tap. 2 (4).
Hated R chips the ball over the river like Cooler TJ did, but the difference is…he makes it. Hole-in-one! 1 (3).
Hailey Storm was too distracted watching Hated R leave the course and kept singing the ball in the water or missing the putt entirely.. 4 (8).
Hudson does slightly better than he did on the first hole, getting used to angles is hard.. 4 (9).
Omar King angles his putt, bouncing it off the walls as it is aimed perfectly. Hole-in-one! 1 (3).
Narcoleptic Ninja makes it to his second swing, but stops to get something out of his tabi boot. After a few moments of being down on one knee, his head slowly leans down to touch the knee that is sticking up. Snoring quickly follows . Automatic disqualification. 5 (10)..
PAUL QUINTON: After two holes, Cooler TJ has some company as Hated R and Omar King join him as front runners for the extra five points. But on the team side of things, Team Kennedy has taken a two shot lead over Team Brunhilde, forty-one to forty-three. It all comes down to the final hole!
A shot of the final hole is shown.
PAUL QUINTON: Now remember. If they make a hole-in-one here, they get an additional three points added to their point standing.
Starting with Brunhilde, we see her line up her shot. She hits it and it bounces off the left wall and makes it to the hill…going have maybe just an inch, before rolling back down. She begrudgingly walks over and hits it a slightly hard, causing it to go up and into the cup. 2 (6)
A new graphic appears at the bottom of the screen: Team Chelsea - 41, Team Brunhilde - 45.
PAUL QUINTON: With a score of six, it is guaranteed that at least Chelsea, Jakeem, Tibaggu, Lena, Kit, Hudson, Hailey, and Ninja are NOT going to be in line for that five extra points. They all have below a six before they even come up to putt. But they still fight for that hole-in-one bonus and the Team win.
Next up is Chelsea Kennedy herself. She aims for the left side, pulls back, and HITS with some force. The ball careens off the side, goes up the hill, and then bounces off the back wall. It creeps toward the hole…slowing down…
PAUL QUINTON: HOLE IN ONE!!!
1 (8).
Team Chelsea - 42, Team Brunhilde - 45.
PAUL QUINTON: Chelsea Kennedy will get the three extra points for that hole in one on the final green.
Then we have Jakeem Kobra. He measures the distance and instead of going around the obstacle on the right, he SHARPLY hits it over. The ball flies, bounces once and ENDS UP ON THE TOP PLATFORM! It bounces and just BARELY hits the lip of the back wall to come back…and…
PAUL QUINTON: ANOTHER HOLE IN ONE!!! Three points for Mr. Kobra!
1 (8).
Team Chelsea - 42, Team Brunhilde - 46.
Jobber Joe steps up, barely aims as the confidence after putting a two in both previous holes has surely got to him. He hits the ball to the left and it barely tapes off the wall. With a sigh he walks up and hits the ball again. This time it barely makes it to the hill before stopping. Another sigh and another hit puts the ball on the top platform, but it stalls out there. A slight tap and the ball finally meets the bottom of the cup.
4 (8)
Team Chelsea - 46, Team Brunhilde - 46.
PAUL QUINTON: Ope! Poor performance by Joe on the last hole and not only has he eliminated himself from that five extra points, but with five players left each…the teams are tied!
Cooler TJ strolls up to the hole, sunglasses on as he is one of the leaders of the day. He aims to the side and hits the ball hard. It bounces and makes it to the hill, climbing half-way up before stopping and rolling back down.
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: This hill is wack!
Cooler TJ hits the ball again, but not too hard that it shoots off course. It makes it three-quarters of the way up the hill and then comes back down.
COOLER TJ THOMPSON: YO! THIS HILL IS DISCRIMINATING AGAINST ME!!!
Cooler TJ gets behind the ball and hits it again, but this time it makes it fully onto the top platform. With a shake of the head, he knocks it into the cup.
4 (7)
Team Chelsea - 46, Team Brunhilde - 50.
PAUL QUINTON: Now with Cooler TJ ending with a score of seven, he is out of the running as Brunhilde The Babe has six after she finished. Right now only Brunhilde, Hated R, Jasiah, and Omar have the ability to earn themselves those five bonus points.
Tibaggu steps up, obviously bummed that he can’t win the best score of the Challenge. He cracks the ball and watches as it bounces off the wall, goes straight up the hill and BARELY ROLLS ACROSS THE RIM OF THE CUP!
TIBAGGU: WOW! What a rimjob!
CHRISTIAN DeMARCO: JUST HIT THE FUCKING BALL!!!
Tibaggu scurries up to the top platform and sinks the putt.
2 (10)
Team Chelsea - 48, Team Brunhilde - 50.
Lena Soulas saunters up to the hole, her smile faded as she carries a score of seven after two holes. She aims, takes a deep breath, and HITS the ball with a nice follow through. It follows the same path as Tibaggu’s, going up the hill…BUT…it doesn’t walk the rim of the cup…IT GOES IN!!!
PAUL QUINTON: HOLE-IN-ONE!!! THREE POINTS FOR LENA!!!
1 (10)
Team Chelsea - 48, Team Brunhilde - 51.
Kit Darling up next. A soft hit off the wall and she makes it to the hill. A second hit and she makes it to the platform, before taking a third hit to sink it.
2 (10)
Team Chelsea - 51, Team Brunhilde - 51.
PAUL QUINTON: With three contestants for each team, we are all tied up at fifty-one points apiece. Another little interesting tidbit, is with all of these holes being a par-three…the individual full course part would be nine and the full TEAM par would be sixty-three. Both teams have the real possibility of beating that score.
Hated R steps up as one of the remaining four who could win the individual best score points. He aims the shot off the left wall, hits it…then quickly tosses his club and turns around to lift his hands in celebration. The ball hits the wall, awkwardly catching a crease in the design, and comes rolling back to him. The sound of the ball hitting his club again causes him to turn around look down. Angrily he grabs the club, pulls back and SLAMS the ball…causing it to ricochet around on the course a bit, just barely stopping at the bottom of the hill.
PAUL QUINTON: Hated needs to calm down. With those two strokes, if he can make this shot…he at least ties Brunhilde for the lead. Otherwise…
Hated R hits the ball and it goes up onto the hill, but stops short of the cup. He pushes the ball with the head of his club, tossing the club in anger as the ball sinks to the bottom.
4 (7)
Team Chelsea - 51, Team Brunhilde - 55.
PAUL QUINTON: …otherwise he will do what he just did. He eliminated himself from those five bonus points that so desperately needs in this competition.
Jasiah is next. He barely gives himself time to aim, before hitting the ball. It hits up the wall farther than the other contestants have done, and easily climbs the hill. But it makes it to the opposite side of the top platform, causing Jasiah to walk over and drain a small butt for a tie of the lead.
2 (6)
Team Chelsea - 53, Team Brunhilde - 55.
PAUL QUINTON: Four left to go, one for each team, and we currently have a two-way tie for individual first place, while Team Chelsea is just BARELY staying out of reach of Team Brunhilde.
Hudson slowly walks up, looking over the course. He measures the angles, wipes off the ball, and hits it. It bounces off the wall, goes up the hell partially, then slides back down. Hudson quickly walks over and without measuring anything time, just hits the ball towards the cup. Luckily it goes up and straight in!
2 (9)
Team Chelsea - 53, Team Brunhilde - 57.
PAUL QUINTON: This is turning into a nailbiter.
Hailey Storm sways her hips as she walks up, keeping her eyes on Hated R. When he finally looks in her direction, she slowly runs her index finger-tip up the shaft of her club. She pulls her club back and as she goes to hit the ball, he blows her a kiss…completely throwing her off.
She misses the ball.
PAUL QUINTON: That’s one stroke.
Hailey fans herself with her left hand, before looking down at the ball. She pulls back and swings forward…
HATED R: Hey baby.
Hailey misses again. She looks up at Hated R and stomps her foot in anger. Without even a second to think, he swings the club hard at the ball, causing it to bounce off the left wall and midway onto the course.
PAUL QUINTON: Uh-oh, Queen of the Fanclub is looking a little mad.
Hailey storms up to ball and hits hit hard enough to drive it up the hill and into the cup.
4 (12)
Team Chelsea - 57, Team Brunhilde - 57.
PAUL QUINTON: And JUST like that we are tied again! With only one contestant left, it is down to Narcoleptic Ninja and Omar King.
Ninja steps up, begins to wobble…but manages to hit the ball. It rolls out to the hill and stops. He slowly walks over, wobbling even more…aims the ball and HITS it. It goes up the hell…to the cup…and HAAAAAAANNNNNGGGGSSSSSS on the edge.
PAUL QUINTON: SO close.
And with that, the wobbling takes full control and Ninja stumbles forward and slams into the ground…passing out. The vibrations of him falling rumble the course JUST enough for the ball to drop in.
PAUL QUINTON: WOAH! I did NOT see that coming.
2 (12)
Team Chelsea - 57, Team Brunhilde - 59.
PAUL QUINTON: So it all comes down to Omar King. There are so many directions to go in just his first few shots. His team is up by two strokes, while Jasiah and Brunhilde are three strokes ahead of him when it comes to the best score bonus.
Omar aims towards the obstacle. He pulls back, hits the BOTTOM half of the ball…sending it flying over the obstacle and into the air. Omar turns towards the camera…
OMAR KING: When I shoot…I don’t miss.
…the ball comes down and sinks to the bottom of the cup!
PAUL QUINTON: HOLE-IN-ONE! AND WITH JUST FOUR STROKES OMAR WINS THE BEST SCORE BONUS, THE HOLE-IN-ONE BONUS, AND WINS IT FOR TEAM CHELSEA. THIS MF’R JUST SCORED NINE POINTS IN ONE CHALLENGE!!!
Cut to the interview room as we see “Killshot” Omar King is sitting down in front of a camera with a cup of whatever drink he has. Clearly, you can see he is happy with the big ass cheesy smile on his face.
OMAR KING: Yo, King of Murder City here, the man whose known as Killshot because when I shoot, I don’t miss cretins. I’ve only gone and won again because all I do is win baby. Fuck all of ya that disagree with that shit too. Imma win on the regular because I’m the damn King and ya gonna bow down to me willingly or imma make ya. Anyway, enough shootin’ at ya losers cause imma winner and like that shit group Dabba sings, the winner takes it all!!!
With that Omar downs his drink and gets to his feet. The last thing you see is Omar toss the cup to the floor before walking off out of shot.
Fade to commercial.
FALLOUT - MARCH 17th, 2022
PROVING GROUND - MARCH 18th, 2022
Coming back from the last commercial break, we find ourselves in the familiar place of a large gymnasium. A ring is set up with Marshall Greene standing in the middle of it, microphone in hand.
MARSHALL GREENE: Ladies and gentlemen. For our matches tonight, we have chosen one of the contestants from the winning Teams and are awarding them with their choice for a singles match. Our first match-up of the night! We have randomly chosen Chelsea Kennedy for her hand in helping Team Tibaggu win the Trivia Challenge. And her challenge is against Hailey Storm!!!
CHELSEA KENNEDY (2-4-0) vs HAILEY STORM (0-3-0)
DING! DING! DING!
Chelsea goes in hard, catching Hailey completely off guard with her viciousness. Knees, punches, elbows, all hell comes raining down onto Storm. Then just when Hailey started to mount a come-back, Chelsea pulled out the big guns and grabbed Hailey in the ‘Spark Out’. Hailey couldn’t withstand the muta lock for long before tapping out.
DING! DING! DING!
MARSHALL GREENE: And your winner by submission…CHELSEA KENNEDY!!!
Another cut away…another empty ring.
MARSHALL GREENE: Next up…the random choice of Tibaggu for his part in helping Team Hailey win the dizzy dummy. ALSO, did you know that Tibaggu and Jobber Joe were the ONLY two to win EVERY Challenge this week? Anyway, Tibaggu has chosen Brunhilde Leichenberg as his opponent!
Tibaggu (1-6-0) vs BRUNHILDE LEICHENBERG (3-3-0)
DING! DING! DING!
Tibaggu played with Brunhilde, letting her hit powermove after powermove…but he kept bouncing back. Brunhilde decided to end it with a powerbomb to the outside…but Tibaggu managed to wiggle around and dropped her with a hurricanrana. With the ‘Passion Spin’ putting Brunhilde on her back, Tibaggu rolled up Leichenberg…
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
DING! DING! DING!
MARSHALL GREENE: And your winner by pinfall, TIBAGGU!!!
Once again, we fade away to an empty ring.
MARSHALL GREENE: Next up, our final randomly chosen competitor…was locked in from the moment he DESTROYED the competition of Putt-putt. Omar King has chosen to face Hated R!
OMAR KING (0-4-0) vs HATED R (1-5-0)
DING! DING! DING!
All of Omar’s aggression and vengeance hung clearly on his face, still from the Survival Challenge of POTR V when Hated R stole away that final golden pinecone. King treated him just as bad, rocking him ALL over the ring. With Hated R not even getting in any offense, Omar King used ‘Off With Ya Head’ kamigaye move to lay out the superstar. With a quick hook of the leg…
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
DING! DING! DING!
MARSHALL GREENE: And your winner, OMAR KING!!!
Final cut away..final empty ring.
MARSHALL GREENE: Our final match of the night is a battle royal between the individuals who were NOT chosen as in the first three matches!
LENA SOULAS () vs COOLER TJ THOMPSON () vs KIT DARLING () vs JAKEEM KOBRA vs HUDSON () vs JOBBER JOE vs NARCOLEPTIC NINJA (0-0-0) vs JASIAH ANDREW SCOTT ()
DING! DING! DING!
This match was thinned pretty quick. Hudson threw Jobber Joe over the ropes while Kit Darling eliminated herself when Lena ducked under an attempted clothesline. Cooler TJ dropkicked Jasiah out of the ring, then Narcoleptic Ninja fell asleep while on the top turnbuckle and fell to the outside by himself. Jakeem Kobra tried to mount an attack on Hudson, but the massive man suplexed him over the ropes. Jakeem crashed hard into a grouping of metal chairs.
Hudson turned to have Soulas and Thompson charge at him through a combined front, but instead Hudson grabbed them both by the throat…lifted them up…then TOSSED THEM BOTH OVER THE ROPES!!!
DING! DING! DING!
MARSHALL GREENE: And your winner by elimination…HUDSON!!!
The crowd, which included Christian DeMarco, clapped heavily as the camera’s focused on Paul standing amongst the crowd as well.
PAUL QUINTON: Six shows down and that Season Finale is coming up REALLY QUICK! Our random teams gave us some good entertainment as Tibaggu led his team to a Trivia win, Joe somehow pull a Dizzy Dummy victory out of thin-air, and Kennedy thanking the good Lord for having Omar King on her team. In two weeks we find out who knows more about the Aughts, who knows the game of Dominos, and see how many of these wonderful people have fried their short-term memory. Enjoy next week’s Fallout and Proving Ground in Cancun, Mexico while I’m stuck here in freezing-ass New York City! GOODNIGHT FOLKS!!!
The camera pans out as the stagehand continues cheering around Paul, as he gets farther and farther away from the camera. Until it finally just fades out to the Project: Honor logo.
