THE F'N EDGE: EPISODE 7

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Welcome to another edition of The F’n Edge! I’m your host, James Edgebrook, and with my broadcast partner unavailable this week, I have a special guest joining me! Please welcome, the one and only…El Puma!

The rotund luchador walks onto the set with a sly smile peeking out from underneath his epic mustache. Thankfully, he is joining the broadcast without his mask so that we can see his manly features in all their glory.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Welcome to the show, El Puma! It’s great to have you as my co-host this week!

EL PUMA: ¿Qué pasa? Es genial estar aquí, señor Edgebrook.

James gives a half-hearted smile, not wanting anyone to realize that he doesn’t speak Spanish.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Right on! What do you say we jump right into things by revealing this week’s Elite 10?

EL PUMA: Sí, eso suena como una buena idea. Tengo todas las notas del señor Fairweather.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Oh boy…
JAMES EDGEBROOK: With one of Project: Honor’s biggest Pay-Per-View events of the year taking place last week, our Elite Ten has seen some significant changes. Second only to Night of Honor, The Crowning was a major stage and the victories and losses will definitely be reflected in this week’s rankings.

EL PUMA: No lo sabría ya que no estaba reservado. Sin embargo, estuve en el ringside para el evento principal.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Well said…I think.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: Why don’t I start things off this week by looking at our number ten spot, featuring the one and only Elena DeDraca. After having a rough spell on Fallout, Elena was finally able to avenge those recent losses by taking it to the GM of Fallout himself, Arik Holt. While defeating someone who is a part-time wrestler may not seem impressive at first, Elena went through hell and back to earn her victory. Not only that, but the fans are buzzing over her upcoming debut on Proving Ground as a full time member of the roster.


EL PUMA: Syndicate regresa al top ten esta semana después de capturar la victoria para su equipo en el evento principal. Mientras lloro por mis amigos en The KaVengers, aún debo reconocer su impresionante logro. Syndicate tiene la suerte de que no estuve en el partido.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: Alyssa Grace had a night of ups and downs in very fast succession. She achieved an amazing win over Jason Long and Savannah Sunshine to capture the Ascension championship, only to have Billy Bennett swoop in and steal it away with her Universal Briefcase. Still, we have to recognize Alyssa as putting on her best performance so far in Project: Honor, and I’m sure there is much more to come for this young lady.


EL PUMA: El Campeonato Gatekeeper quedó en manos de Henry Lee Hyde. Derrotó a Angelo Caito y Earl Boyde en The Crowning, ambos ex campeones por derecho propio. Se mantiene en el número siete esta semana, pero se rumorea que hay cambios en la tienda para su título. Esos cambios podrían verlo elevado en el ranking más temprano que tarde.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: The Shining Star is still the X-Factor Champion, and recently set a new record for the longest title reign and most defenses. Still, MYOJIN was on the losing side in The Crowning’s Main event, and even though they didn’t take the fall, that loss has bumped them down a couple of spots. I’m certain all it will take is another successful title defense to put MYOJIN back in the top five.


EL PUMA: Casanova English pudo haber tenido su defensa del título más difícil en The Crowning. Mientras que Douglas Crane estaba a solo segundos de llevarse el título, Casanova logró retener con su movimiento final Silence of the Lambs. Esta exitosa defensa del título lo lanza entre los cinco primeros, y está empezando a parecer que nadie podrá quitarle el Warrior Rising Championship.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: Emmanuelle slips to number four this week after losing the Grand Championship to Arata Asakura in one of the most hotly contested one-on-one matches we’ve seen this year. A loss to someone like Asakura is nothing to be ashamed of, and The Platinum Standard continued to look strong even in defeat. For now she remains in the top half of our list, as I can’t imagine we’ve seen the last of her title opportunities.


EL PUMA: Lo que nos lleva a la siguiente entrada en nuestra lista, el nuevo Gran Campeón, Arata Asakura. Emmanuelle fue una campeona muy dura, y al derrotarla para convertirse en dos veces campeona, Arata se ha ganado nuestro puesto número tres. Es poco probable que este reinado sea tan corto como el anterior, así que espero verlo permanecer en el Elite Ten por un tiempo.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: It should come as no surprise to see Billy Bennett in at number two this week, as she was a member of the winning team in The Crowning’s Main Event as well as the new Ascensioni Champion. Whether you like her tactics or not, they are bringing Billy amazing results. She is now just one win away from tying Project: Honor’s longest winning streak, but to earn that spot, she’ll have to dethrone Havoc as Prime Champion in the process. If that happens, I fully expect Billy to land at number one on our next list. Of course, that’s easier said than done.


EL PUMA: Finalmente en el número uno está Havoc. Sigue siendo el Primer Campeón, pero también se convirtió en el Tirano de Project: Honor en The Crowning. Sobrevivió a otros veinte competidores para ganar esa distinción, eliminando a competidores muy duros como Brandon Hendrix y Michael Bishop en el proceso. Si sobrevive a su próximo combate con Billy Bennett para unificar los títulos de Ascensión y Prime, puede permanecer en este lugar durante mucho tiempo.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: That’s it for this week’s Elite Ten. Stay tuned as El Puma and I will be right back after this message with our Medals of Honor for The Crowning II!




JAMES EDGEBROOK: Welcome back to The F’n Edge! If you’re watching this, you already know that The Crowning II was an incredible event. Despite many close races, we have managed to select this week’s Medal of Honor award winners. With that in mind, let’s kick things off with some of our fans favorite promotional material!



JAMES EDGEBROOK: Look, the two weeks of promotional material leading up to The Crowning was insane. I almost feel dirty for excluding the efforts of Emmanuelle, Havoc, Syndicate, and so many other fan favorite contributions. While the Medals of Honor are going to those listed, it should be noted that we could have easily had 5 runners up for each brand. So my hat’s off to all the competitors in Project: Honor who continue to entertain us week after week.

EL PUMA: Incluso yo, el gran El Puma, me quedé asombrado por lo que presencié. Todos ustedes son ganadores. Yo también sería un ganador, si esta empresa se molestara en contratar a un traductor. Bastardos baratos.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: The reveal of our new ownership team ran away with the fan voting this week, and we understand that Arik Holt had a private meeting with the three owners in the parking garage after the cameras stopped rolling. With Christian DeMarco, Indy Darling, and Lil’ Petey now calling the shots in Project: Honor, it seems as if Arik Holt’s days are numbered.

EL PUMA: ¡También hubo mucho amor por los patrocinadores del programa!

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Um, sure. What he said. There was also a great deal of appreciation for our sponsors as the warriors of Project: Honor pimped some of their favorite products!

EL PUMA: ¿Entiendes algo de lo que estoy diciendo?

JAMES EDGEBROOK: I couldn’t agree more, El Puma.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: There was a bit of a split when it came to our fans’ favorite ongoing feud, but one thing they have in common is that they both involve the True Society. Other than Big Drip Worldwide and The KaVengers, the group continues to have trouble with individual competitors like Jason Long, Michael Bishop, and Brandon Hendrix. It does seem as if it’s the True Society against the world at times.

EL PUMA: Literalmente podría decir cualquier cosa en este momento y no me entenderías.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: That’s an excellent point, El Puma. Not only is The True Society fighting nearly everyone on the roster, but the divisions within the group are just as interesting. It may not be another group that defeats them. They may just defeat themselves.

EL PUMA: Eres un hombrecito estúpido.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Great observation, partner.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: The Crowning gave us a ton of memorable action, but the one spot our fans really latched onto occurred during the closing moments of the Warrior Rising Championship bout. Douglas Crane was able to lock Betsy Galagher in his Release Me hold, but Casanova English responded by applying the Silence of the Lambs to LeeAnn Morgan. From there it became a race to see who could hold out the longest.

EL PUMA: No sé por qué debería molestarme en decir algo. Eres claramente un imbécil.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: That’s right, El Puma. In the end, LeeAnn succumbed to Casanova while Betsy fought against Crane’s move, giving English the victory. Although it wouldn’t surprise me to see Casanova and Crane eventually settle their differences in a one-on-one encounter. As for our runner up, Havoc took advantage of a distraction to eliminate both Michael Bishop and Brandon Hendrix simultaneously. What a way to earn himself the Tyrant’s crown!

EL PUMA: ¿Entiendes las palabras que salen de mi boca?


JAMES EDGEBROOK: While Billy Bennett’s surprise appearance at the end of an amazing Ascension Title Match shocked everyone and led to a surprising new champion, most fans could not deny our winner this week.

EL PUMA: El poder de la amistad persevera.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: The bravery of Percival Burque and the sacrifice of his teammates nearly led to Big Drip Worldwide defeating The True Society once and for all. Seeing the Ratman rally Lil’ Petey’s team was a feel-good moment, even if he did suffer a severely fractured leg shortly thereafter. KaVengers Kassemble indeed!


JAMES EDGEBROOK: With 13 superstars battling inside two rings surrounded by a steel cage, it was not surprising to see Wargames take home the winner for best match. From Drago’s air raid crash to Noah Hopes suicide shooting star press, this thing had it all. The True Society emerged victorious despite the tensions between them, but all three teams must be recognized for giving us a true classic.

EL PUMA: De nada.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: However, despite the overwhelming number of votes for Wargames, the two out of three falls match between Arata Asakura and Emmanuelle was simply a masterclass in professional wrestling. The determination of the challenger, the tenacity of the champion, and the impeccable moves and counters displayed by them both…it was a beautiful symphony of violence.

EL PUMA: Estoy de acuerdo, pero podría decir cualquier cosa sobre la pelea, y no tendrías idea. Podría decir que eres un eunuco mentalmente deficiente, y solo sonreirás y estarás de acuerdo.

Edgebrook smiles and nods at his temporary broadcast partner before going on to the next category.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: And lastly, when it came to this week’s winner for the Medal of Honor for Superstar of the Week, the fans have chosen Billy Bennett once again. Not only was Billy a member of the winning team in The Crowning’s main event, but her surprise cash-in to claim the Ascension title could not be overlooked. The only question I still have is, who or what could possibly stop this run of momentum that Billy is on?

EL PUMA: Estoy perdiendo el tiempo aquí. Podría estar bebiendo tequila con mis siete esposas.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: But while Billy takes home the big prize, we have a tie for her runner up. Arata Asakura comes as no surprise here, as he reclaimed the Grand Championship in a stellar bout with Emmanuelle, but sharing the spot with him is Percival Ratman Burque. Not only was he defiant in the face of adversity, but he somehow turned a group of losers into a threat to be reckoned with inside of Wargames.

EL PUMA: Percival es mi animal espiritual. A diferencia de James Edgebrook, tiene inteligencia y carisma.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Oh, I heard my name in there! El Puma must be reminding me that it’s time for a commercial break! Don’t go anywhere, because The F’n Edge will be right back with a special interview segment from our own Lou Robertson!




Returning from the commercial break, we go to a separate part of the studio where Lou Robertson is standing by for another edition of Project: Honor Perspective.

LOU ROBERTSON: Welcome back, everyone. This week I have a very special guest joining me in the studio. In the past, they have been referred to as the ‘Heart and Soul’ of Project: Honor. With Lil’ Petey wrapping up his in-ring career, this superstar will be the one consistent performer who’s been here since the beginning and is still going strong. Not only that, but they recently set a record as the longest reigning X-Factor Champion in company history, a distinction previously held by one of the company’s new owners, Indy Darling. Of course I am talking about The Shining Star…The Technical Aristocrat…The Prince of Constellations…and Osaka’s Golden Sun. Please welcome the one and only…MYOJIN.

MYOJIN walks into view with a laidback smile, wearing tinted sunglasses and their signature leather jacket with skinny jeans. Their hair, however, instead of being the usual long, wavy blonde style~ was shorter, spiky, and platinum colored with hints of a cool purple. And of course, the Shining Star carries the X-Factor Championship, draped across their shoulder- and an apple, biting into it. They sit down next to Edgebrook, resting their title in their lap.

LOU ROBERTSON: Welcome to the show, MYOJIN, and thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to join me.

MYOJIN: The pleasure is all mine, Lou. It's been a while since I've been here, hasn't it? This has been long overdue.

LOU ROBERTSON: Before we get into things, congratulations on setting a new record as X-Factor Champion. Tell us, what does this accomplishment mean to you?

The platinum-haired champion smiles brightly, looking down at the golden reflective main plate of the X-Factor belt.

MYOJIN: I'm glad you asked, because it means everything. When I first won this title, my goal the moment it was in my possession was to be the greatest X-Factor Champ there ever was. Throughout my reign, I have always given props to Indy Darling for being a true champion~ but I needed to surpass him… And I have. I'm not finished there though, I don't want to just be the longest reigning X-Factor Champion… I want to be the longest reigning champion in all of Project: Honor.

LOU ROBERTSON: Since winning the title from Lance Williams, you’ve defended it against such names as Cadillac Jackson, Casanova English, and Kyle Valentine. Looking to the future, who do you see as potential challengers in the weeks and months ahead?

The Shining Star takes their shades off and folds them on the collar of their shirt, pausing as they thought.

MYOJIN: I'm not picky. I'll gladly face whoever is thrown in front of me, because it doesn't matter who.. I'm always going to prevail. That said..? I like the fire Brandon Hendrix has been showing lately, he could be fun… If English wants to fight again, I'll gladly humble him once more. But I do have someone I'm rather fixated on… And that's Shelldrake.

LOU ROBERTSON: Let’s talk a little about Swindle Shelldrake. He was one of your partners in Wargames at The Crowning, but it seemed as if the two of you suffered some miscommunication. Was that a simple one-and-done issue, or is there more to this that we’re not aware of?

Their easy-going demeanor shifts, eyes squinting into a glare as their smirk drops

MYOJIN: I haven't forgotten about Wargames.I also haven't forgotten about Shelldrake running his mouth~ and I'd more than gladly pay him back and show him that he's not as much of a threat as he seems to think he is.

LOU ROBERTSON: Your alliance with the other members of Big Drip Worldwide was tenuous at best. It seems like the only thing you all had in common was a desire to oppose the True Society. Now that it’s all said and done, do you regret your decision to join Lil’ Petey’s group?

MYOJIN scoffed, rubbing their smooth chin while tilting their head.

MYOJIN: Is that even a serious question, dear Lou? Big Drip Worldwide was a mistake. Drago Santiago said it best himself, it was a group of people who had no real cohesion- No real desire to work together… That and, can I be honest? Besides maybe Ozymandias before he got arrested, I'm leagues ahead of every single one of them. Big Drip was not on my level, and I was dumb enough to let them drag me down. Won't let that happen again.

LOU ROBERTSON: Has the outcome of Wargames completely soured you on the idea of a team? Perhaps there are others in Project: Honor that may complement your style better? Such as your occasional tag team partner, Emmanuelle?

MYOJIN: I am so glad you asked, sweetheart. You see, Wargames had me thinking… I know that I could do better than either True Society or Big Drip Worldwide- KaVengers are irrelevant- But, I'm not one to tell all.

LOU ROBERTSON: Beyond defending the X-Factor Title, what does the future hold for MYOJIN? Does challenging Arata Asakura for the Grand Title interest you? Perhaps even setting your sights on the Legacy gold?

Their grin returns, widening with a little mischievous glint in their eyes.

MYOJIN: Who am I to say no to the possibility of being a double champion in Project: Honor? While the X-Factor title has been my primary focus, I think that the vacant Legacy title would be a nice shiny thing in my growing collection. And of course, the Grand title will always be anyone on Proving Ground's end goal… but I like the idea of Big Platinum. As I said, dear Lou; I'm not picky.

LOU ROBERTSON: No matter what may be next, it seems as if the future is bright for The Shining Star. Thank you again for joining me today. Do you have any parting words for your fans or peers?

The ever-so-confident X-Factor Champion turns to face the camera.

MYOJIN: 2021 was my year. 2022 will also be my year. For all that supports yours truly? They are more than appreciated and I hope to continue proving them right for rooting for me. As for everyone that hates me? I hope to piss you off even further. Toodles~

MYOJIN gives a charismatic wink before blowing a kiss.




JAMES EDGEBROOK: Welcome back to The F’n Edge. I’d like to thank Lou Robertson for that interview, and I’d also like to thank El Puma for joining me during the Elite Ten and Medals of Honor. Now, joining me for this week’s predictions, please welcome Guy to the studio!

With a meek smile, the enhancement talent known simply as Guy meanders into the studio. He takes the seat previously held by El Puma and gives an awkward wave to the camera.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Good to see you again, Guy.

GUY: Good to be here. I actually missed my flight but my wife let me borrow her broom so I made it just in time.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: …right. And I understand you have Julius’ picks with you?

GUY: I sure do. They were faxed to me from someplace called Happydale Sanitarium earlier today. Although his notes are a bit jumbled. It’s like getting messages from one person with three personalities, kind of like when my wife is having her time of the month.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: I’m not touching that with a ten foot pole…

GUY: What a coincidence…that’s what I say to her every other day of the month. Not that a ten foot pole could make her happy anyway…

JAMES EDGEBROOK: O-KAY! And with that, let’s remind everyone where Julius and I currently stand with our predictions! After predicting four correct outcomes at The Crowning to Julius’ one, the score is forty-two for me and forty-four for my regular co-host!





JAMES EDGEBROOK: We have three relatively new performers in this opening contest, making the predictions somewhat hard to make. Nonetheless, I like what I’ve seen of Tate Selby thus far, and I’m choosing him to have an impactful debut.

GUY: Fair enough. Julius has some weird scribbles for this one. Maybe it’s a pentagram or something? I guess I’ll just choose for him. Since my wife likes spending her weekends with midgets so much, I’ll go with Carny Sinclair.


JAMES EDGEBROOK: This match is another interesting line-up and somewhat difficult to predict. I still think Yuriko Toyama has a lot that we haven’t seen yet, and this will be the show where she unleashes her full potential.

GUY: Eh, maybe. Julius wrote his prediction in some kind of foreign language or maybe it’s demonic text. I guess I’ll go with the first option and assume he’s picking that filthy Russian, Andrei Sokolov.

GATEKEEPER CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
HENRY LEE HYDE (c) vs. LATOYA HIXX

JAMES EDGEBROOK: My sources are telling me that the new ownership has some interesting plans for the Gatekeeper Title. Whatever those plans may be, I don’t see Henry Lee Hyde losing to Latoya Hixx after successfully defending against Angelo Caito and Earl Boyde.

GUY: When watching Hyde on the television last week, my wife said something I haven’t heard since I first met her on the street corner where she worked. She said, “Well, hello there.” I guess if he’s good enough for my wife, he’s good enough for me. Henry Lee Hyde retains.

#1 CONTENDERSHIP FOR THE ? TITLE
ALYSSA GRACE vs. ANGELO CAITO

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Alyssa Grace is coming off an impressive victory as well as a crushing defeat at The Crowning. I think that brief taste of gold will propel her to better things and give her the edge over Angelo this week.

GUY: According to Julius’ notes, he says that everything in The True Society is just fine. I’ll take that to mean he’s picking Angelo in this one.

NON-TITLE SINGLES MATCH
MR. WRIGHT vs. SAVANNAH SUNSHINE

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Mr. Wright didn’t show us much at The Crowning, but he’s shown enough on Fallout to earn my vote. This match may be non-title, but I still think he has what it takes to overcome Savannah Sunshine this week.

GUY: It doesn’t matter if I agree with you or not, because Julius wrote “I love Savannah like my heavenly sister. May the sweet Baby Jesus bless her and guide her to victory.” That’s awfully sweet. It almost reminds me of a poem I wrote for my wife on Valentine’s Day. I wrote “Please kill me”.

TAG TEAM MATCH
BFG DIVISION (LIZ KARLSON & MICHAEL BISHOP) vs. JOHNNY LEVY & SONYA BENSON

JAMES EDGEBROOK: I’m really looking forward to seeing how Johnny Levy and Sonya Benson react to being sent to Fallout for a week, but I’m even more interested to see the team of BFG Division in action. I’m going with Bishop and Karlson in this one.

GUY: Let’s see what Julius had to say about this match. He says, and I quote, “Fuck that motherfucker James Edgebrook and his motherfucking predictions. I’m in a motherfucking padded cell and that motherfucker ain’t checked in on me once!” I don’t know about you, but that seems like an endorsement for Levy if I’ve ever heard one.

PRIME AND ASCENSION UNIFICATION MATCH
BILLY BENNETT VS. HAVOC

JAMES EDGEBROOK: What a main event this is going to be. Fallout is unifying the Prime and Ascension Titles, which means two members of True Society will have to face off in the main event. So far, Billy Bennett has managed to capture every title she’s set her sights on, and I don’t see why this should be any different. I think Billy kicks off this new era by dethroning Havoc.

GUY: Bold choice, James. Let’s see if it pays off for you. At this point in his notes, Julius goes off on a tangent about his waking nightmares. Seeing as how Havoc is the Nightmare Tyrant, I guess he’s picking him to retain.

SINGLES MATCH
JOHN BLADE VS. MIKEY HERO

JAMES EDGEBROOK: While both Blade and Mikey had flashes of brilliance in the Casino Battle Royal, I’m going to pick the young up and comer in this one. Mikey is young, hungry, and I’ve really liked what we’ve seen out of him so far.

GUY: There are some bloodstains covering up what Julius wrote down here. To borrow a phrase from my buddy, Rapture, I’ll take a stab in the dark and assume Julius would pick John Blade. I mean, the guy is like a one-man KaVengers team all on his own. No way can Mikey Hero overcome that.

SINGLES MATCH
DOUGLAS CRANE VS. OFFICER GREYFIELD

JAMES EDGEBROOK: We saw how good Douglas Crane can be at The Crowning when he nearly dethroned Casanova English. Because of that, I’m picking Crane to regain his momentum this week at the expense of Officer Greyfield.

GUY: Julius says, “Fuck, fuck, fuck the police!” My wife might take his comments literally, but I’ll just assume that he’s choosing Douglas Crane to win as well.

FOUR ON FOUR MATCH
BETSY GALAGHER, DIANA, LEXI GOLD, AND STELLA JADE VS. EL PUMA, GUY, NOAH HOPE, AND SERRANO POBLANO

JAMES EDGEBROOK: I think the real question here is whether or not Serrano and Noah will have recovered from The Crowning. Still, Guy and El Puma will be fresh, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s to never doubt The KaVengers. You have my support, Guy.

GUY: If my wife’s bra can’t support her saggy melons, I don’t know how your support can possibly hold us up. Percy is out of action. Noah and Serrano are at fifty percent at best. El Puma may not even realize he’s booked this week, and I know a total of three offensive maneuvers. Thanks, Jimmy, but that was a stupid pick. It doesn’t matter what Julius says cause I’ve been beaten down by the same woman for years. Who knows what four of them will be able to do to me. I’m going with the four ladies in this one.

SINGLE MATCH
BRANDON HENDRIX VS. ELENA DEDRACA

JAMES EDGEBROOK: After witnessing what she did to Arik Holt on Pay-Per-View, I’m not about to bet against Elena DeDraca. This will be her debut match on Proving Ground, and I foresee her starting off strong with a victory over Don Dada.

GUY: I still can’t read Julius’ scribbles here. I guess I’ll go out on a limb and make my own pick. Since my wife recently discovered this crazy Project: Honor fanfiction site, she’s become a huge fan of Brandon Hendrix, his horse, and his overly developed stamina. So on behalf of my wife, I’m picking Elena DeDraca. Fuck that tall, handsome man and his ability to turn my wife on. Then again, that’s about as difficult as turning on a lightswitch unless you’re me.

WARRIOR RISING TITLE MATCH
CASANOVA ENGLISH (c) vs. TJ THOMPSON

JAMES EDGEBROOK: TJ Thompson is one of the few competitors to hold a victory over Casanova English, even if it was by referee’s decision. I think Casanova will avenge that loss here, because I’m starting to think no one can take that title from around his waist.

GUY: Julius drew a picture of a giraffe licking an ice cream cone alongside the words “Baby Jesus loves TJ”. I guess there’s still a little drip left in your co-host after all.

TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH
THE PHANTOM TROUPE (KYLE VALENTINE & DJ HUNTER) Vs. MOTOR CITY PSYCHOS (JULIUS FOULWEATHER & SLADE CASTLE)

JAMES EDGEBROOK: There’s a bit of a question mark surrounding this match, considering Julius is currently locked away in an asylum. I can only assume he’ll be out in time to compete, but even if he’s not, I don’t think I want to bet against Slade Castle here. For all we know, True Society will initiate the old multi-man tag team rule and defend the belts without him. Julius has had multiple partners, so why can’t Castle?

GUY: Speaking of multiple partners, my wife just loves Julius Fairweather. I guess that could explain the Cadillac parked outside my house every Tuesday night. Still, he is a bad motherfucker and he’s held those tag titles a long time. I’m picking The Motor City Psychos as well.

SINGLE MATCH
CADILLAC JACKSON VS. LIL’ PETEY

JAMES EDGEBROOK: As the Lil’ Petey Retirement Tour continues, we have the surprise return of Cadillac Jackson! All due respect to Petey, but I’m not betting against Caddy in his big return to the company! I think Petey goes out in the time-honored tradition of putting everyone else over.

GUY: Unlike my wife, Petey doesn’t lay down for just anybody. That guy has too much of an ego to do that. Julius is picking Petey to win here, and I have to agree with him. I just don’t understand why they were called The Motherfuckers. My wife has never had children.

TAG TEAM MATCH
EMMANUELLE & MARK HUNTER vs. ARATA ASAKURA & SWINDLE SHELLDRAKE

JAMES EDGEBROOK: And finally we get to this huge tag team main event. The feud between Arata and Emmanuelle may be cooling down, but they have one more stop with Mark Hunter and Swindle Shelldrake along for the ride. Since this is Mark Hunter’s official return to the ring and Emmanuelle will be looking to avenge her loss at The Crowning, I’m picking them to earn the victory here.

GUY: That sure would be swell, but trust me on one thing. The good guys do not always win. Seeing as how I’m a pretty good guy despite what my wife says, I’m living proof of this. Julius started scribbling satanic verses in his notes again, so on his behalf I will choose Arata Asakura and Swindle Shelldrake to pick up the win.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: And that does it for our predictions! I’d like to thank Lou Robertson, MYOJIN, El Puma, and Guy for joining The F’n Edge this week. I’d also like to thank our sponsors, including the new Project: Honor action figure line! Don’t miss out on the action! Pick up Project: Honor Warriors Series 11 at your nearest toy store today!


GUY: Well, I guess that about does it for me. Oh…there’s a message at the bottom of Julius’ fax. It says I’m supposed to give you his notes so they can be passed on to the right person.

Guy hands the notes over to Edgebrook as he rises from the desk, then gives the camera an awkward grin before walking off the set.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: Hmmm…interesting.

James examines Julius’ notes for a moment before returning his attention to the camera.

JAMES EDGEBROOK: *Ahem* Well then, it seems I have other business to attend to. With that, I’d like to thank you all for joining us. We’ll be back next week with a rundown of Fallout and Proving Ground, hopefully with Julius back in his rightful spot. This is James Edgebrook saying, “If you’re gonna do it, do it with Honor”! Until then, enjoy the haunting voice and eerie stare of Peter Cetera! Goodnight everyone!