PROVING GROUND XXIX: THE RAT RACE RESULTS

♫ To be more than a conqueror
You have to learn to enjoy the pain
If you want to survive the game ♫

With Skillet’s “Surviving The Game” playing in the background, the video intro begins with the reigning X-Factor Champion, MYOJIN, as they hit the Falling From Heaven EX on a fallen opponent. That is soon followed by the Sultan of Spice as he wiggles his body in the center of the ring and slaps his ass cheeks in preparation for a spicy stink face. Appropriately enough, a disgusted expression from Sonya Benson comes soon after those images of Serrano.

♫ You can try to defeat me (Defeat me)
You don't know it's the pain that'll feed me (Feed me)
And I'm gonna take back what you took before (Before)
'Cause I was born for this
All the bones that you're breakin' (Breakin')
You pretend that you're the one that can save me (Save me)
Now I'm takin' it back, it was never yours (Never yours)
I'm fightin' ♫

Lexi Gold is shown celebrating a victory as the crowd cheers her on, before we get a shot of Douglas Crane screaming as he locks in his Release Me submission hold. This section of the video wraps up with an image of Stella Jade connecting with one of her tarot themed signature moves.

♫ Fightin' for my focus
Give the pain a purpose
Light the fire inside
Feel it come alive (Come alive)
Show 'em what I'm made of
Victory's for the brave ones
Who never bow the knee
When it's do or die (Do or die-ie-ie)
One more time ♫

We see John Blade waving his hand in front of his face before turning completely invisible. Tara Fenix is the next to be highlighted, as we see the Phoenix Queen executing her Phoenix Lock. Finally, there is a shot of the intimidating Mason Kane, Proving Grounds’ official problem solver, with his arms crossed in front of his chest.

♫ Survivin' the game
I can be unstoppable
Gonna walk through Hell
Gonna shake the walls
Survive, survivin' the game (Survivin' the game)
Livin' the impossible
I'm the champion, indestructible (Survive)
Survive, 'cause I'm survivin' the game ♫

Kyle Valentine and DJ Hunter take over the screen next, with these members of The Phantom Troupe hitting Gran Rey Cero with perfect accuracy. After that shot of in-ring action, we then see Arata Asakura decked out in one of his many expensive suits, glaring at the camera. Lady Galagher joins the intro, connecting with her Betsy Bomb on an unfortunate opponent.

♫ I can be unstoppable
Gonna be indestructible
I can be unstoppable
Gonna be indestructible ♫

The smug smile of Larry KaChow appears, soon to be followed by the eccentric Percival Burque as he throws one of his pocket rats at an unsuspecting opponent. From those unlikely images, we go to a shot of LeeAnn Morgan as The Gypsy Rose connects with The Parade.

♫ All the liars around me
Like the wolves of the walls that surround me
In the face of the fear, I keep standin' tall
'Cause I will conquer this
Knock me down like a lion (Lion)
I was born to be demon defiant (Defiant)
And I won't ever let this kingdom fall (Fall)
I'll show 'em ♫

Giovanni vogues for the camera and gives his best runway model expression, immediately followed up by Officer Greyfield beating down a perp with his billy club. Then comes the disturbing sight of a smiling Casanova English, moments before he connects with the Silence of the Lamb.

♫ Show 'em what you're made of
Victory's for the brave ones
Never bow the knee
'Cause it's do or die (Do or die-ie-ie)
One more time ♫

Malachite Minj licks the back of his hand before brushing a few strands of hair away from his face, which then transitions to TJ Thompson executing Hip with the Drip. Then comes images of Johnny Levy, who gives the camera an arrogant grin before we see the execution of his Box Office Blockbuster.

♫ Survivin' the game
I can be unstoppable
Gonna walk through Hell
Gonna shake the walls
Survive, survivin' the game (Survivin' the game)
Livin' the impossible
I'm the champion, indestructible (Survive)
Survive, 'cause I'm survivin' the game (Game) ♫

With Francis in hand, DIANA gives a happy smile to the camera before the scene switches to the much different visual of Swindle Shelldrake. The Kraken is shown planting Mark Hunter with Violent Salvage before we switch to images of Archimedes J. Manson bringing his unique cartoon sensibilities to life.

♫ I am more than a conqueror
The past behind me, life is ahead
I'll take the way of the warrior
I walk alone, no fear to the death
One more time ♫

As the intro draws nearer to its conclusion, General Manager Indy Darling gives the camera a thumbs up, before we then see The Platinum Standard in motion. Following Emmanuelle’s Palisades Bomber and an image of her raising the Grand Championship over her head, we get a shot of Skylar Ramsay giving a smirk during her entrance.

♫ Survivin' the game
I can be unstoppable
Gonna walk through Hell
Gonna shake the walls
Survive, survivin' the game (Survivin' the game)
Livin' the impossible
I'm the champion, indestructible (Survive)
Survive, 'cause I'm survivin' the game (Survive)
Survivin' the game (Survive)
Survivin' the game
Livin' the impossible
I'm the champion, indestructible (Survive)
Survive, 'cause I'm survivin' the game (Survive) ♫

Finally, the Proving Ground logo emerges on the screen with the reigning Legacy Champion, Ozymandias, rising above it with arms outstretched, like a leviathan rising from the darkest depths of the ocean.

♫ I can be unstoppable
Gonna be indestructible
I can be unstoppable
Gonna be indestructible ♫




We go to the Rocket Mortgage Fieldhouse as a burst of pyrotechnics erupts from the stage and ring posts. The cameras scan around the sold-out crowd as they come alive for another edition of Proving Ground and wave their signs in the air.

“SONYA BENSON PAID FOR THIS SIGN”
“THE PLATINUM ERA HAS BEGUN”
“THE SYNDICATE IS BROKEN”
“SWINDLE SHAKE & DRAKE”
“CALLIOPE WILL U MARRY ME?”

After briefly scanning the audience, one of the cameras takes us to the ringside announce position as Trey Booker and J.T. Price are standing by to welcome viewers to the show.

TREY BOOKER: Welcome to Proving Ground everyone! I hope you’re ready for a wild ride, because Percival Burque is our General Manager for one night only!

J.T. PRICE: Thank God it’s only for one night. Have you seen the card, Trey?

TREY BOOKER: Indeed I have, and I admit that I’m excited to see how it all unfolds!

J.T. PRICE: If this is Adam Ekaterin’s way of running things, I might join the True Society myself.

TREY BOOKER: Percy earned this opportunity long before Mr. Ekaterin came on board, and you should really have a more open mind when it comes to new things.

J.T. PRICE: An open mind? I’m more likely to open my wrists if I have to put up with matches themed after all of Percy’s jobber friends…

TREY BOOKER: Don’t let my broadcast partner bring you down, fans. Tonight is going to be a must-see spectacular so let’s get started!


HOLLY PEREZ: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the NEW Grand Champion…EMMANUELLE!

Emmanuelle makes her way towards the ring to a huge round of applause from the crowd as “Cash Flow” blasts over the loudspeakers. The Grand Championship belt is draped over her shoulder as she enters the ring, Holly Perez handing over her microphone to the new champion as the crowd continues to cheer her on.

TREY BOOKER: To say that Emmanuelle won the Grand Championship with some controversy would be a massive understatement.

J.T. PRICE: She grabbed Arata’s tights as clear as day, but the official missed it and she managed to steal the title. I’m not saying that Emmy’s no good, but I’ve got to call a spade a spade here!

TREY BOOKER: As messy as the title situation has been the past few weeks, Emmanuelle’s asked for some time to address the Proving Ground fans here as well as the locker room and Project: Honor as a whole.

Emmanuelle takes a moment for her music to stop playing, the crowd reaction mostly positive but with a few boos mixed in now. The booing more than anything draws out a sly smile from the new champion as she stands in one of the corners of the ring, peering at her newly won prize on her shoulder.

EMMANUELLE: I actually checked this with the office to make sure the dates were right. On January 9, 2021, a bratty bitch from the Pacific Palisades signed with Project Honor. She had just recently taken hold of the WrestleWorld Shogun Championship and expectations were high, even if only in her own mind. It was an up and down year to say the least. I got some massive victories and had some frustrating losses. I survived a Seven Gates of Hell match to retain the Warrior Rising Championship, only to lose it in the Tokyo Dome to Tara Fenix. I rebounded and got on a roll and got close to winning the Clive Darling Memorial Cup….but Tara was in the way again.

Emmanuelle pauses for a moment, holding her title for a moment more before draping it back over her shoulder.

EMMANUELLE: Setbacks happen. Obstacles come and have to be negotiated. I could have packed it up after losing the Warrior Rising Championship, but I didn’t. I could have packed it up after losing that playoff match for the Cup, but I didn’t. I could have sat on my ass and ignored opportunity calling, but I. DID. NOT! And look, exactly one year after ink went to paper and I became a member of the Proving Ground Roster, I stand here as Grand Champion!

The crowd gives a loud, rousing cheer as Emmy leans over the ropes, a smug little grin on her face.

EMMANUELLE: I’m sure this is the point where you think I’m going to take it easy now that I’m on top of the mountain. I’m not going to do that for a couple of reasons, just so you all know. First, it’s not in my genetic makeup to settle with just having one accolade, one thing to my name. My family built their wealth in California by always pressing forward, always refusing to be content. What does that mean? Well….I saw this on the F’n Edge, the Elite 10 ratings! Do you guys mind putting up a graphic with all the names listed?

Emmy points to the HonorTron as a graphic displaying names and pictures of all the Elite 10 honorees and their ranks as it comes up on the screen.

#10 - SONYA BENSON

#9 - JASON LONG

#8 - CASANOVA ENGLISH

#7 - ARATA ASAKURA

#6 - BILLY BENNETT

#5 - EMMANUELLE

#4 - MYOJIN

#3 - SYNDICATE

#2 - HAVOC

#1 - OZYMANDIAS

EMMANUELLE: NUMBER FIVE!? Really? When you go on the Project: Honor website, it describes The Grand Championship as the top championship in professional wrestling. Not just the company, but professional wrestling? How the hell am I ranked number five, then? People can point to my record before winning it, but they can’t take away the fact that I’m holding it and that I stand at the top of this sport. So, my first goal as Grand Champion is to elevate this title back to the lofty, respectful place on the totem pole it deserves, period. Secondly…on that same broadcast, I heard this:

The Honor Tron plays an actual piece from The F’n Edge broadcast with Julius Fowlweather speaking about the matches to take place on both shows.

JULIUS FOULWEATHER: Hmmm. A tag team match consisting of two teams that cannot hope to match Slade Castle and myself. In the end, it doesn’t matter which of them win, because they will never be the Tag Team Champions. I’ll choose the Phantom Troupe, simply because Emmanuelle’s ego will have expanded after her recent victory, fracturing her occasional partnership with MYOJIN once and for all.

As the Honor Tron pauses, Emmy turns back to the crowd with an annoyed expression as a few fans near ringside start to laugh at the expression on her face.

EMMANUELLE: This is the other reason I’ve got a little chip on my shoulder. People like this Julius guy who think that I’m going to just hotdog and grandstand now that I’ve got my hands on the big prize. There’s always room in my trophy cabinet for more gold, be it here on Proving Ground, Fallout, or even outside of Project: Honor! I mean, I’m not surprised that people are hopping on the bandwagon now, putting out trash takes like this for clout. But all you have to do is speak my name and I’ll gladly appear to take you on…and take whatever gold you happen to be carrying too. And if you don’t think that Platinum and Gold is up to the task, you all can watch us kick some ass in our match tonight!

TREY BOOKER: This seems like a very thinly veiled challenge to the tag champions from Emmanuelle!

J.T. PRICE: The girl’s lust for gold is going to get her in a mountain of trouble. Foulweather and Castle are as tough as they come and are the Tag Champions of this company for a reason.

EMMANUELLE: One more thing. I know a few of you are still a bit sour about how I beat Arata for this belt. I know there’s a certain blue-haired cutie with a trophy where she’s earned the right to call her shot. There’s challengers, even my fellow champions here. Yeah, that even includes Myo. I know that there’s a lot of people who look at me as some easy mark of a champion, that the Grand Championship may be a little too heavy for someone like me to carry. As long as I have this title, let’s just say I have an “Open Door Policy.” I don’t care if you work for the tiniest indy fed or carry the Legacy title, anybody can get it. So, I’ve said all I’ve got to say about things for the time being. Welcome to the Platinum Era of Proving Ground. Even if you’ll hate it now….you’ll learn to love it!

Emmanuelle tosses the microphone aside as her music begins to play again, her declaration as the new Grand Champion having reached its conclusion.



TREY BOOKER: …what is going on with our graphics?

J.T. PRICE: Oh, you didn’t hear? Percy gave them the night off…

HOLLY PEREZ: The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL and is a BASIC BITCH MATCH! Already in the ring is your special guest referee, NNNOOOAAAHHH HHHOOOPPPEEE!

Noah smiles brightly, waving to the crowd from his spot as the crowd goes wild. There's a slight nod from the male, who focuses his attention on the task at hand.

TREY BOOKER: Man, talk about a shoddy ref.

J.T. PRICE: Hey, come on! Noah Hope did beat Jason Long. Y'know, pre-entity or whatever. Give him some credit!

HOLLY PEREZ: Introducing first, from Manchester, England... BBBEEETTTSSSYYY GGGAAALLLLLLAAAGGGHHHEEERRR!

"Dusted" by Asteroid Boys plays and Betsy walks out with her robe on, taking her place in the middle of the ramp, where she stretches her arms to either side and lets the robe fall slightly down her back, exposing her shoulders but still being mostly worn. As she starts walking to the ring, she alternates between pointing at herself and at the crowd, her confidence only second to how much she appreciates the fans.

HOLLY PEREZ: And her opponent, from New York City, New York... SSSKKKYYYLLLAAARRR RRRAAAMMMSSSEEEYYY!

With the lights going out within the arena, a set of laser lights shoot down onto the stage and strobe along to the beat of ‘Hydrochloride’, and one singular spotlight shines down onto a hooded figure as the opening lyrics are heard throughout the arena.

♫ YOU'VE TAKEN ALL MY PAIN AWAY
AND GAVE ME SHINY CHAINS
YOU'VE TAKEN ALL MY DOUBTS AWAY
REPLACED IT WITH THIS SHAME
YOU TOOK AWAY ALL MY PROBLEMS
YEAH, YOU BET
AND THEN YOU GAVE ME A BRAND NEW SET ♫

The figure soon lifts her hood past her head and shows the facial features that belong to Skylar Ramsey -- looking around the arena with a slight smirk to her face -- as she soon begins her long walk to the ring.

♫ I THOUGHT I WOULD RIDE THE HIGH SO HIGH UNTIL I CAN'T BE REACHED
BY GRAVITY
YOU WON'T CATCH ME
WON'T CATCH ME
EVERYONE EXCEPT ME ♫

As she soon makes her way around the ring, Skylar slides right under the bottom ropes and brings herself up to one knee, sliding off her ring jacket before leaping back up to her feet and charging into the corner -- where Skylar leaps onto the second rope and looks out to the crowd with that sly grin to her expression.

With both opponents now standing in the ring, Noah Hope glances from one to the other, making sure they are both ready before signaling for the bell! As soon as the bell rings, Skylar steps forward and both women begin to circle around one another. As they meet in the center of the ring, Skylar goes for a lock up. But, as soon as Betsy makes a move to lock hands, Skylar drives a boot into her stomach. Betsy doubles over as Skylar drops down onto her back to deliver a hard slap across Betsy's face with ease. Betsy holds her face in slight shock, stares blankly at Skylar, and Skylar merely shrugs.

TREY BOOKER: Pure disrespect here from Ramsey tonight. Just look at that!

J.T. PRICE: Hey, all is fair in love... and wrestling. But, that slap could be heard through the arena! Wow!

Skylar bounces off the ropes, charges forward and takes Betsy out with a Lariat. Spinning Backfist comes next as soon as Betsy is back to her feet and it's all topped off with a wicked Discus Lariat! Rhythm Echo connects and Skylar goes for the first pin of the night!

ONE! TW-

No! Betsy kicks out full of fire much to Skylar's chagrin. Skylar begins firing away with left and right strikes as Betsy does her best to cover up. Noah Hope forces Skylar away from Betsy, causing an argument between them. Betsy sizes Skylar up as soon as the referee is out of the way and charges forward. Betsy lifts one leg up, charging forward with full power, and drops Skylar with a wicked Claymore! Single leg dropkick connects as Betsy kips back up a second later. She lets out a fired up roar as the crowd goes wild for her.

TREY BOOKER: Incredible! Betsy Gallagher is out here tonight with some incredible moves. Just look at the power behind that dropkick!

J.T. PRICE: I wouldn't talk so soon if I were you because Skylar is back to full recovery!

As soon as Skylar charges towards Betsy, momentum shifts again! Betsy dodges Skylar's incoming attack and catches Skylar's wrist. Betsy catches her in a wristlock and nearly takes her head off with a Short-Arm Lariat! Queen's Lariat turns Skylar nearly inside out as Skylar rests against the ropes to try to catch her breath. Betsy drags her to the center of the ring and hooks the leg!

ONE! TWOO! TH-

NO! Betsy looks incredulous as she glances towards Noah Hope who holds up two fingers. Skylar keeps an eye on Betsy who is on one knee and uses this to her advantage. Skylar uses the free knee as a step up and connects with a vicious Step Up Knee Strike! Legacy Break signals a dizzy and dazed Betsy who stumbles on jello legs.

TREY BOOKER: My God, did you see that?! Talk about an unfair fight. Skylar has been nothing but a savage during this match!

J.T. PRICE: As she should be. I mean, if I were in her position, I would be doing whatever it takes to get the upper hand.

Skylar drags Betsy to her feet, whips her into a corner roughly, and goes for the Moment of Clarity! Feint Bicycle Big Boot into a Spinning Back Elbow connects and Betsy slumps down onto the canvas. Skylar drags Betsy to the center and then runs off the second rope to nail a Running Second Rope Moonsault! But, Betsy moves out of the way at the last moment. Skylar meets canvas after an attempted Eclipse and cringes in pain.

TREY BOOKER: Oof! Looks like Skylar should have calculated that one better.

J.T. PRICE: Or maybe Betsy should have just stayed still. That option sounds better to me.

Betsy drags herself to her feet, taking advantage of the moment. Betsy charges forward with Skylar's back towards her and delivers a wicked Running Knee Strike to the back of Skylar's head. Skylar is seeing stars after the Regal Knee connects! Betsy lifts Skylar up with ease and sets up for the Betsy Bomb! Sitout Double Underhook Powerbomb connects as Betsy folds Skylar like an accordion.

ONE! TWOO! THREEE!

HOLLY PEREZ: Here is your winner via Pinfall... BBBEEETTTSSSYYY GGGAAALLLLLLAAAGGGHHHEEERRR!

The bell rings and Betsy's hand is raised in victory as Skylar lays in pain on the canvas. The fans cheer loudly as commentary claps as well, even the seemingly sullen J.T. Price.

TREY BOOKER: What an incredible match from top to bottom. But, Betsy comes out on top in this match up! Skylar tried her best and nearly had Betsy in a couple of moments. But, in the end, Betsy proved to be dominant!

J.T. PRICE: I agree, for once. As much as Skylar tried to deter Betsy, the newcomer just had something to answer each time.

A dazed Skylar rolls to the outside of the ring as Noah Hope raises Betsy’s arm into the air. Then, after acknowledging the winner, Noah reaches to his back pocket and pulls out a white cloth object. He flips it open to reveal a simple white tee shirt with the word “KaVengers” written on the back in black magic marker. With a smile on his face, Noah tries offering it to Betsy, who scrunches her nose and gives him a puzzled expression in response.

Noah continues to try forcing the shirt on Betsy, who finally leaves the ring without accepting it.

TREY BOOKER: Was…was he just trying to get the winner to join the KaVengers?

J.T. PRICE: Oh shit…I heard rumors that something special might be in store for the winners tonight. Please tell me that’s not what it is…


We cut to backstage where our general manager for the day, Percival “Ratman” Burque, sits in a large office. In front of him is a large stack of papers.

RATMAN: I was told there would be no paperwork! Why is there paperwork? Ratman can’t read or write! What am I to do?!

A rat in a karate gui comes into view from behind one of the stacks.

PAPERCUT: *Squeak squeak*

Ratman shakes his head, now looking much more determined to get through the stack.

RATMAN: You’re right, Papercut. This is my duty as Genital Manager. I must get this done!

Ratman triumphantly raises his finger into the air. Papercut tilts his head at his much larger friend then struts over to a pile of shredded papers to lay in.

RATMAN: Now then, to the first one.

Ratman grabs a paper and brings it maybe an inch from his face as he looks over it very closely. It’s almost as if you can see the cogs slowly grind along as he attempts to read the paper.

RATMAN: Something, something, very important, something….

Ratman stops and shrugs as he sets the paper onto the desk and grabs a brown crayon and begins to scribble onto the paper.

RATMAN: Done! Wow, this whole manager thing is easy! I should manage my own wrestling company. I’d call it… Ratman’s Wrestling Extravaganza! I would be the first world champion of course.

Ratman continues to make his way through the papers scribbling on them, one after the other, occasionally switching crayons to, as Serrano would put it, “spice things up.” Suddenly, as he is drawing on all of these important documents, the door flies open. It’s Larry KaChow.

RATMAN: Ah! Well if it isn’t Uncle Larry! What brings you to my office?

Larry looks at the papers on the desk as an expression of horror comes across his face.

LARRY KACHOW: Oh dear god, I’m too late…

Percival gives Larry a confused stare shortly before going back to work on the papers.

RATMAN: Now, what could you mean by that? I’m afraid I’m a busy rat, Uncle, and I have a lot of work on my plate. If you have something to say you should say it quickly. You have a match to prepare for after all!

LARRY KACHOW: Percival, you must stop what you’re doing, this isn’t your office…

Just as Larry says that, a familiar face walks through the doors.

ADAM EKATERIN: What is going on here… oh…

Adam stands in disbelief as Ratman continues to color over all of the documents on the desk, that is the ones that hadn’t already been shredded for Papercut. Adam throws a hand on his head as Larry begins to plead to him.

LARRY KACHOW: Mr. Ekaterin, I swear I had nothing to do with this. You have to believe me.

ADAM EKATERIN: I’d hope not, I think one of those was a renewed contract we were working up for you…

Larry now appears mortified as he runs behind the desk, cartoonishly grabbing Percival by the neck, and dragging him away.

RATMAN: *choking noises*...wait… I wasn’t… done *more choking noises*

LARRY KACHOW: So sorry, we’ll be going now.

Larry dashes out, Ratman in his arms, rushing past Mr. Ekaterin as he looks around at his destroyed office. As the sounds of Ratman choking fade, Adam slowly walks over and around the desk to sit down and survey the damage.

ADAM EKATERIN: *sigh* It reeks in here…

Suddenly, Papercut's head pops up through the shredded paper. Unsurprised, Adam stares at the rat who stares back at Adam.

ADAM EKATERIN: You can go now little guy.

Papercut scurries off the desk and out the ajar door, leaving a lone shot, of a very unenthused, Adam Ekaterin.


With the bell ringing for the next match, “5 out of 6” by Dessa starts playing as the crowd lets out a cheer at the expectations of a good match, waiting with bated breath for the arrival of Lexi Gold.

HOLLY PEREZ: Making her way to the ring, she hails from Los Angeles, California. She is the Golden Goddess, Lexi Gold!

As the crowd waited, eventually something would stir from behind the curtain, but instead of Lexi it was Giovanni with his beautiful muse hanging on his arm. Waving his hand with a smile, he’d do his best to show his magnanimous attitude towards the crowd who were instead relentlessly booing his presence.

TREY BOOKER: Hold on a minute, I think we got a big time mix up here!

Despite the music clearly not being his own, Giovanni seemed oblivious to it as he slowly made his way into the ring, first lifting Calliope onto the apron before joining her in the ring with a microphone.

GIOVANNI: What a great Cincinnati crowd we have here tonight, once more your ability to create white noise equals the sheer depression one would get from setting foot in the city.

The Cleveland crowd would let him hear it, and with slight confusion Giovanni would scratch his head as he shrugged a little bit and spoke a few back and forths with Calliope.

GIOVANNI:] As usual, it seems there might be some confusion, which I cannot blame any of you for, after all, it seems comprehension isn’t something native to the city of Columbus.

Giovanni was preparing to continue speaking, but the sound of “Diamonds” by Megan Thee Stallion broke his attempt at monologuing further. Once more the crowd would cheer, this time in the knowledge that Stella Jade would come out and put Giovanni in his place.

J.T. PRICE: Seems these competitors are having a bit of stage fright, today…

Again after an awkward wait, we’d see the oversized chest of Barlon Mando strut onto the stage before being followed by America’s beloved actor-turned-wrestler Johnny Levy, strutting with confidence and blowing oversized kisses to his adoring fans, who were returning their undying love and support by throwing all forms of slurs and jeers at him.

He pauses to hand out a few pre-signed headshots to the crowd, which are almost entirely balled up and thrown back in his face. Despite this completely unprovoked hatred he’s receiving, he keeps a cheerful, perfect smile on his face, taking the time to glad-hand with his adoring fans on his way to the ring. Eventually - only after several minutes of wasted prime-time television - he climbs into the ring and grabs a microphone handed to him by an official waiting outside.

JOHNNY LEVY: THANK YOU! CANTON, OHIO!

For the third time, the Cleveland crowd would let him hear their ‘love’ for continuing to mistake their city for another one.

JOHNNY LEVY: Giovanni, tell them how much I was looking forward to coming here.

GIOVANNI: I think your words were “Can’t wait to leave this shithole”.

Both would let out an ostentatious laugh at the city’s expense as they seemed completely oblivious to what was going on.

Eventually they were once more distracted, this time by ringside announcer Holly Perez awkwardly trying to get their attention. Giovanni would close in, leaning between the ropes and listening to what she had to tell them.

GIOVANNI: Wait, what do you mean this isn’t our match?!

Looking back at Levy in confusion, the beloved actor would shrug.

JOHNNY LEVY: I mean that would explain the production messing up our entrance music!

For a third time, they wished to continue speaking but for the second time in short succession the sound of Dessa aired through the arena. But this time the crowd let out a roar at the sight of Lexi Gold stomping down the ramp towards the ring, fire in her eyes and looking beyond pissed off at the antics of Levy and Giovanni.

LEXI GOLD: Hey, who the hell told you you could come out here and steal MY time?!

Levy and Giovanni shared a look, quirked eyebrows, and Giovanni would step forward.

GIOVANNI: Relax, Lottie. It’s not as if people were looking forward to your entrance anyways… Isn’t that right, crowd?

The crowd would explode in boos levied at the presence of Giovanni, who merely took it as a confirmation of his own words rather than their disapproval of his existence.

JOHNNY LEVY: You know what, Lana. Maybe if you go to the back for five more minutes, let the real stars of this show say what they have to say, and then you can have your pretty little entrance a third time. Which if you ask me, is three times too generous anyways.

For Levy the same would happen as with Giovanni, with the crowd raining down boos on him and the deluded actor assuming they weren’t aimed at him and were instead approving of his words.

Lexi seemed little deterred though, and seemed very much not ready to turn around and let Giovanni or Levy run their mouths.

LEXI GOLD: Well IF you’re not going to leave the ring, maybe I’ll just have to make sure you won’t be in it… Not in five minutes, but right now!

The crowd roared to life as Lexi dropped her microphone and took two strong strides forward, but to the audience’s shock and anger Levy would be the first one to slide out, leaving Barlon Mando to weather the storm. Lexi would level her eyes towards Giovanni instead, who’d expertly replaced his presence with Calliope, standing behind her and making a few cocky gestures at Lexi to try her best.

TREY BOOKER: What superstars we have on Proving Ground, running away when they’re challenged by a single individual!

J.T. PRICE: Pump your brakes, Trey. Those two have matches coming up, they can’t be wasting their time on someone aggressing on them!

Eventually Giovanni would slide out of the ring himself as Lexi pushed forward looking to take his head off, leaving Calliope awkwardly standing in the ring as a human shield. Levy and Giovanni would angrily talk amongst themselves as Lexi Gold leaned herself over the rope, daring either of them to get into the ring and waste anymore seconds by talking.

LEXI GOLD: I see how it is, hiding behind your girl like a little bitch! It shows you how tough you two really are. You come out here and mock my entrance for your own personal humor, but when confronted with a fight you run with your tail tucked between your legs. I guess that's how you operate around here. Gio, you and I? We are done here. For now at least…

Giovanni would let out an exasperated expression, and Calliope quickly joined by stomping her foot in anger at the coarse words from Lexi Gold. But the crowd instead ate it up with a gigantic roaring ovation and the repetition of the words towards Giovanni.

GIOVANNI: You can’t say that on TV! And don’t bring my dear muse into this!

Giovanni, in full protection-mode would cradle Calliope’s ears, staring angry daggers at the woman in the ring.

While the action in the ring has been playing out, Levy is making the rounds with the audience, offering autographs, handshakes, even pictures with the kids in the first few rows. Predictably - to everyone but himself - he gets nothing but boos, shouted insults, and even a few globs of spit which he expertly ducks.

After some time spent working the crowd, he makes his way to the announcer’s booth, where he offers a firm handshake to both commentators before he begins to shove Trey Booker out of his chair while reaching for the man’s headset. By this point, it seems like Giovanni has finished up in the ring, coming to join his partner-in-art in taking over the commentary desk.

TREY BOOKER: What are you doing here?! We’re the announcers!

JOHNNY LEVY: Go away you idiot, nobody wants to hear your mindless banter.

J.T. PRICE: I don’t know about you, Book, but I'm going to get a beer!

With the two announcers forcefully displaced from their place of work, Levy and Giovanni take their seats behind the announce desk.

JOHNNY LEVY: Greetings ladies and gentlemen, my name is ‘The Superstar’ Johnny Levy, and we’re ready for match… erm… something, and please welcome my broadcast colleague, Giovanni.

Rather than having put on a headset, Giovanni had in some way or shape procured a lounge bed, comfortably splayed out on it as Calliope was in the process of massaging his muscles, playing with his hair, and feeding him the occasional grape.

JOHNNY LEVY: Anyways, I think tonight we have the match of a very rude Lexi Gold facing… erm… I forgot, and I don’t think anybody honestly bothers to watch these matches anyway…



The song “Diamonds” by Megan Thee Stallion comes pouring out of the arena’s sound system. Stella Jade steps out onto the entrance ramp and begins a brisk walk to the ring as the two best broadcasters in the business continue their commentary.

JOHNNY: How short is this woman anyway, 4’5”? 4’6”? Don’t they have special leagues for people that size? There’s got to be a carnival around here somewhere.

GIOVANNI: Mmhmm. Just one second... <grape chewing noises>

DING! DING! DING!

As soon as the bell rings, both competitors step forward and share a wholesome, sportsmanlike handshake. Guy - in his adorable referee shirt - beams with pride at officiating a match between two well-mannered young ladies.

From there, they move into a traditional lock-up, the match starting with some classic chain-wrestling that ends with Lexi in a side headlock.

JOHNNY: So, wait a second, this Lexi girl is called the Gold Standard? I thought there was already a Platinum Standard in this company?

GIOVANNI: <grape chewing noises>

JOHNNY: All I’m saying is it’s confusing. Who has the higher power level? Platinum is more valuable, but gold looks much better.

GIOVANNI: <grape chewing noises>

JOHNNY: Hmm.. you raise an interesting point, friend.

Lexi manages to loosen her opponent’s grip with a few elbows to the ribs, before she pushes Stella away... right into the ropes.

Bouncing back towards Lexi, Stella quickly ducks a clothesline, hitting the opposite ropes and coming back with a dropkick that hits the Gold Standard directly in the chest.

Lexi hits the mat in a roll, rising back to her feet in a smooth, professional motion. Stella rushes back in, unleashing a wild, uncontrolled spinning forearm, which Lexi swiftly ducks and counters with a lifting side slam that plants Stella down onto the canvas.

Lexi pulls her opponent back to their feet; but before she can follow-up, Stella kicks her in the stomach and begins laying in repeated forearm strikes which stagger Lexi backwards.

Stella goes for a discus clothesline, but she’s interrupted as Lexi suddenly rebounds forward and leaps up to counter with a bicycle kick that sends Stella reeling.

Lexi rushes forward to press the advantage, grabbing Stella around the waist from behind. Before Lexi is able to follow-through with any offense, Stella manages to daze her with a few alternating elbow strikes to her head.

Reversing the hold, Stella ends up behind Lexi and throws her backwards with a German suplex that causes the Gold Standard to land harshly on the back of her neck. Not releasing her grip, Stella drags her opponent back into a standing position, before executing the same maneuver a second time.

Lifting the woman back up for a third suplex, Stella is caught off-guard by a sudden burst of energy from Lexi. The blonde lunges forward - Stella’s arms still wrapped around her waist from behind - and leaps up to plant her feet on the waiting ring ropes.

Using them as a jumping-off point, she manages to roll up and over her opponent’s shoulders, breaking the grip as she does so. Grabbing Stella’s shoulders and spinning her around so they’re face-to-face once more, Lexi lifts her up and drops her to the mat with a standard scoop slam.

JOHNNY: So I’ve really been hitting the weights lately. Check out these guns. Nice, huh?

GIOVANNI: <grape chewing noises intensify>

JOHNNY: So kind of you to say that. Quick, how much do you think I can bench?

Stella slips out of the ring, looking to regain her composure after that last impact. Lexi doesn’t give her the chance, running the ropes before sliding underneath them, her boots cracking Stella in the jaw.

Lexi grabs Stella by the back of the head, wheeling around with her and building momentum to toss the younger woman into - and over - the commentary desk!

Giovanni’s bowl of grapes clatters to the floor, causing him to scream in shock and horror at this unfortunate turn of events.

GIOVANNI: NO!!!

JOHNNY: Whoa! Watch the suit, damned ruffians!

GIOVANNI: ...but...

JOHNNY: Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen. It’s these blasted youth and their lack of respect. You know how they get when they haven’t played Fortnite in an hour. Shameful.

GIOVANNI: ...my delicious grapes... ruined... wasted... other appropriate adjectives...

While her opponent recovers on the ground behind the announcer’s table, Lexi grabs the ladder at ringside and slides it into the ring.

Looking confused, Guy shakes his head, waves his hands about wildly, and begins to kick the ladder out of the ring. Lexi actually has to yell at Guy to get him to stop, reminding the guest official about the stipulations. He grins sheepishly and nods, trying to play it off like he was just kidding around and didn't actually forget about the unique match type.

Lexi begins to look around for the package that she’ll need to win the match, when a flurry of movement comes from the entrance. In full uniform, Pat the Postman comes running toward the ring, a wrapped parcel in his hands. He makes it to ringside with amazing speed for a man of his size, hands the package over to Lexi, and then tips his cap on a job well done. As Pat disappears back the way he came, Lexi tosses the package into the ring, before climbing back through the ropes and beginning to set up the ladder.

By the time Stella has recovered and entered the ring, Lexi is already three steps up with the package held tightly under one arm. Before her opponent can drag her off or tip the ladder over, Lexi lifts the package overhead and hurls it down at Stella.

Catching it out of the air, Stella doesn’t have time to celebrate the save before Lexi comes crashing down after it, flattening her with a flying crossbody.

Lexi gets back to her feet, Stella only beginning to stir once Lexi has fully regained her balance and retrieved the victory package. She steps towards the bottom of the ladder, ready to climb it, hang the package above the ring, and secure the win.

JOHNNY: That might be it, folks. Looks like Goldilocks has this one in the bag. And it’s about time; all this ‘professional’ ‘wrestling’ was about to put me to sleep.

GIOVANNI: No, you know what? As a man of culture and peace, there’s a lot I’m willing to put up with. But after that show of aggression against my grapes - who never hurt a soul, I might add - I simply cannot abide by this...

JOHNNY: ...what does ‘abide’ mean? Hey, Giovanni, where are you going...?

Taking off his headset and whispering in Calliope’s ear, Giovanni and his attendant walk to opposite sides of the ring as Lexi begins to ascend the ladder. Leaping up onto the ring apron, Calliope gets Guy’s attention with a sharp whistle and a friendly wave.

With blushing cheeks, the jobber-turned-referee shuffles over for a spot of awkward, fumbling chit-chat with Giovanni’s assistant. Noticing these shenanigans, Lexi climbs back down the ladder, most likely looking to get rid of the interfering valet.

Her feet hit the canvas just as Giovanni slides into the ring, aiming a ‘Starstruck’ superkick at the side of her head in a surprise attack. Sweet revenge for ruined fruit.

Just before the bottom of Giovanni’s boot can make contact with Lexi’s skull, the woman ducks... and the kick goes sailing over Lexi’s head, striking Stella - who has just finished getting back to her feet - in the side of the head.

Stella hits the mat in a heap, knocked out completely by the surprise superkick. Looking back at her fallen opponent, Lexi realizes that Giovanni has just ruined her match and handed her a victory by underhanded means.

Immediately, she stomps towards him, finger raised as she shouts accusingly.

Not wanting any of that smoke, Giovanni backs away and slips underneath the bottom ropes to exit the ring in a hurry.

By the time that Guy has finished fawning over Calliope and turned his attention back to the action, Giovanni is already out of the ring; all the official sees is Lexi shouting at him, and an unconscious Stella in the middle of the ring.

He looks a tad confused, probably wondering what happened while he was falling for the oldest trick in the book. Did anyone actually expect competent officiating from a Proving Ground jobber, though?

JOHNNY: ...uhhhh. Yeah, I’ma head out. Have a blessed evening, y’all.

Tossing the headset away, Levy scurries to the side of the ring to make sure his partner hasn’t been mentally or spiritually wounded by any of Lexi’s threatening, hooligan-esque behavior. The temporary commentators - and their respective underlings - make a controlled retreat back up the entrance ramp as Lexi Gold is left in the ring with an unconscious Stella Jade.

Staring angrily at Giovanni as the interloper escapes backstage, she eventually turns back to her opponent’s prone body. After tapping Stella’s arm with the toe of her boot a few times, trying to rouse her opponent awake so she can finish this match properly, she eventually gives up.

With a sigh of disappointment and a look of hesitation, Lexi grabs the package off the ring apron and begins to climb the ladder that is - miraculously - still standing in the middle of the ring.

After ascending to the very top, she hangs the package on a hook as Guy signals for the bell.

DING! DING! DING!

Looking unhappy at this tainted victory, Lexi refuses to let the referee raise her arm in victory after she descends the ladder, instead occupying herself with making sure her opponent is alright after that vicious, unexpected superkick from Giovanni.

The regular commentary team can be seen slowly heading back down the entrance ramp to their desk, rubbing their bellies and discussing what they had on their impromptu snack break.

They nod their heads - respectfully - to the fleeing Levy and Giovanni as they pass by.

As Stella begins to regain consciousness, Guy intervenes and suggests the three of them share a group hug, seemingly inviting them to join him in The KaVengers. Stella is too dazed to respond as she rolls out of the ring, while Lexi does her best to politely decline the embrace.

With the contest over and the announce team returning to their desk, Douglas Crane is spotted in the front row, watching everything unfold. He seems to be more focused on Lexi Gold than Stella Jade for some reason. He appears almost mesmerized by her but neither she nor her opponent notice him.

TREY BOOKER: Why is he out here J.T.?

J.T. PRICE: I don’t know man, but he gives me the creeps every time he comes out to just stare at people. Why can’t he just watch matches from the back like everyone else?




We come back to Proving Ground as "Badstreet USA" by Crossfyre slowly fades out and we are met with Holly Perez in the center of the ring.

HOLLY PEREZ: The Following Contest is a Payback Match with Percival “Ratman” Burque, and Serrano Poblano as special guest referees! Already in the ring, weighing in at a combined weight of 420lbs, Kyle Valentine, DJ Hunter, The Phantom Troupe!

The camera cuts to The Phantom Troupe who appear to be ignoring Percival and Serrano, the referees, making faces at the two. DJ and Kyle are focused on the ramp ahead, ready for their match.


The lights dim down while the catchy, fast paced rock of RAINBOWS by A9 echoes as a spotlight suddenly appears on a figure on the ramp, with his back turned and begins kneeling. Once the beat finally kicks in, MYOJIN explodes with energy- wearing a masquerade-style mask over his eyes, and turns around with a confident smile on his face, raising his arms to soak in the positive reaction from everyone around.

With his blonde locks hanging over his face. He then whips his head back, flipping his hair out of his face before excitedly running down the ring before performing a cartwheel and a jump, landing on his feet near ringside!

He climbs up to the apron, grabs a hold of the top rope, and slingshots himself into the ring. MYOJIN performs a somersault roll, landing on his side with a hand on his hip. The other, taking off his mask to reveal his piercing blue eye contacts. He tosses it aside nonchalantly before climbing up the top turnbuckle, tilting his head upward as if he’s looking toward the sky- while the lights mimic stars above. He backflips off, back onto his feet while taking off his flamboyant coat and moving to his corner. The lights go back to normal as he checks his wrist tape. His charismatic smile fading to a more focused expression as he paces back and forth, ready for action.

"Cash Flow" by Ace Hood ft T-Pain/Rick Ross begins to play as Emmanuelle makes her way from behind the curtain and onto stage. Emmanuelle looks around to the crowd then raises her newly crowned Grand Championship. She rests the title on her shoulder as she makes her way down to the ring to stand next to her partner.

HOLLY PEREZ: And their opponents, The X-Factor and Grand Champions, Myojin, Emmanuelle, Gold and Platinum!

Emmanuelle and DJ step out of the ring as Myojin and Kyle get ready to square off when the bell rings.

TREY BOOKER: The Phantom Troupe are in for quite the night with possibly one of their biggest opportunities and challenges yet in Myojin and Emmanuel.

J.T. PRICE: While Serrano and Ratman may have been trying to get one over on the pair, this could benefit the two should they get the win!

TREY BOOKER: The combined momentum of Platinum and Gold may be difficult to overcome though, as these two have just as much to lose should Phantom Troupe get one over on them.

Myojin attempts to lock up with Kyle who side steps and lays in a kick to the shin of Myojin. Myojin stumbles but quickly regains their footing and attempts another lock up which Kyle yet again sidesteps, this time kicking the thigh of Myojin. Myojin grabs at their thigh now and looks to Kyle, this time looking for an opportunity to get ahold of their opponent.

TREY BOOKER: Myojin seems to have underestimated the quickness of Kyle Valentine.

J.T. PRICE: Wait, I think Myojin has something in mind.

Myojin attempts one last time to lock up with Kyle, who once again steps to the side, however, as Kyle goes for the kick, Myojin reacts as they catch Kyle’s leg. With Kyle’s leg in hand Myojin takes the opportunity to respond with a kick of their own, sweeping the other leg of Kyle knocking Valentine to the ground!

TREY BOOKER: It looks like The Technical Aristocrat had that one scouted.

Myojin keeps the leg in their arm as Kyle struggles to break free. Myojin attempts to roll Kyle for an ankle lock but Kyle denies them and uses the momentum to roll through and break the hold. From the ground, Kyle jumps to his corner, tagging in DJ Hunter. Myojin attempts to stop it but is too late as Percival makes the call and DJ Hunter jumps the ropes hitting Myojin with a loud enziguri! DJ runs to the opposite side of the ring where he bounces off the ropes but is caught by Emmanuel who pulls the rope down. DJ tumbles out of the ring, giving Myojin time to recover and follow DJ outside the ring. Myojin lifts DJ’s head as he stands back up and hits him with a hard Shotei chop.

TREY BOOKER: Phantom Troupe had an early lead but it appears Myojin and Emmanuel have isolated DJ for the time being.

J.T. PRICE: Not a place DJ Hunter wants to find himself. Serrano should step in and start the count but he seems preoccupied with some of the fans at ringside.

Myojin picks up DJ again, this time hooking the arm and dropping him with a steep Osoto Gari takedown having some fun with their opponent. Myojin pulls DJ up one last time, this time, rolling him back into the ring. Myojin pulls DJ to Emmanuelle where they make the tag. Myojin twists the arm of DJ while Emmanuelle steps through the ropes and slams down on the arm before she takes a hold of it. DJ writhes in pain as Emmanuelle pushes him toward the center of the ring, pulling him back for a short-arm Clothesline. Emmanuel keeps the arm and drags DJ back to his feet. Kyle begins to get uneasy and sticks his body through the ropes to yell for his partner, but Ratman steps in his way telling him to stay in his corner. Meanwhile Emmanuelle pushes DJ into the corner where Myojin traps his arms, allowing Emmanuelle to go for an arm trapped big boot! Kyle continues to argue with Ratman as the two continue a combined assault on DJ. Finally, Serrano from the outside steps up to the apron, telling Myojin to unhand DJ and for Emmanuel to allow DJ out of the corner, initiating a five-count!

J.T. PRICE: While Pepper Jack Cheese may have a vendetta here, it looks like don’t want any foul play!

TREY BOOKER: Good news for Phantom Troupe because I’m not sure DJ could handle much more of this double teaming!

Myojin releases DJ as Emmanuelle backs away, however it looks as if Emmanuelle is going for a big boot in the corner but DJ ducks underneath as he spins around hitting Emmanuelle with a big time dropkick to the lower neck! Emmanuelle falls to the ground just out of reach from Myojin. DJ begins to crawl to his corner as Ratman moves away from Kyle to check in with Serrano to see what was happening. DJ continues to crawl as Emmanuelle begins to recover. Emmanuelle dives for DJ’s leg but it’s too late as he gets a hot tag with Kyle! Kyle springs to action as he jumps through the ropes, leaping over Emmanuelle, and kicking Myojin off the apron with a big yakuza kick! Kyle turns around and runs to Emmanuelle, hitting her with a snap suplex, holding the head and rolling through, picking Emmanuelle up and dropping her with the Bad Moon Rising Cross-legged fisherman DDT. Kyle quickly rolls over for the pin as Ratman drops to the ground to count!

ONE!

TWO!!

KICKOUT!

Kyle rises to his knees, looking at Percival who gives the two-count sign back. Kyle shakes his head, annoyed at his wide-smiled rival. Kyle drags Emmanuelle to his corner when he tags in DJ. The duo lift Emmanuelle and hit her with stereo superkicks leaving Emmanuelle’s head spinning. Not letting up, the pair hit Chasing the Demons, the Discus Big Boot from Kyle shortly followed up with the Running Legsweep from DJ. DJ this time drops down for the pin!

ONE!!

TWO!!!

THR~ KICKOUT!

DJ and Kyle both look to Percival and try to argue the decision, thinking the count may have been slow. Finally, the two pick up Emmanuelle, this time ready to attempt to put her away for good. DJ climbs to the middle rope while Kyle holds Emmanuelle in the Gory Special for the Gran Rey Cero, but just before DJ can jump Myojin jumps up to the apron behind DJ pushing him over to the outside of the ring. DJ takes a hard tumble as Myojin jumps through the ropes into the ring.

TREY BOOKER: It looks as though Percival has completely lost control of this contest!

J.T. PRICE: I’m not particularly surprised. These aren’t our normal trained officials.

MYOJIN hits the unaware Kyle Valentine in the back of the head with a rolling Kappu kick, forcing him to release Emmanuelle. Emmanuelle rolls to the outside of the ring, leaving both legal participants outside. MYOJIN, now looking down at his opponent annoyed, as this has gone on longer than they would have liked, picks Kyle up then hits a hard thrust kick, knocking Kyle out on his feet then dives in, locking in Orion!

TREY BOOKER: MYOJIN has Kyle locked into that Imanari Roll in the center of the ring!

J.T. PRICE: But neither of them are the legal competitor!

Serrano begins the count for both Emmanuelle and DJ while Percival watches as MYOJIN keeps that hold locked in on Kyle.

SERRANO: ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

Kyle starts to break and begins slamming the mat! Ratman begins to look as if he’s going to call it, but Serrano stops him, reminding Ratman that the legal competitors are outside. Now realizing who the legal competitors are, Ratman breaks the hold MYOJIN has on Kyle.

J.T. PRICE: Finally that stinking Ratman has done the right thing.

TREY BOOKER: I’m not sure these two knew what they were signing up for, officiating this match!

As Serrano continues to count, Emmanuelle and DJ both slowly begin to make it back to their feet while Ratman gets MYOJIN back to their corner and then checks on Kyle Valentine who is clutching at his ankle.

SERRANO: FIVE! SIX!

Emmanuelle makes it in as Percival tries to assist Kyle, who is refusing help, to the apron.

SERRANO: SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE!

DJ quickly slides under the rope also making it in at a nine-count! However, Emmanuelle has already made it to her feet and lifts DJ to his feet who attempts a discus lariat, but Emmanuelle ducks it and hits the Cross Counter! DJ turns over as he falls to the mat, shortly followed by Emmanuelle who locks in the POT/Punch Out Time

J.T. PRICE: This could be it!

TREY BOOKER: Emmanuel has that modified STF Sleeper synched in tight!

Ratman runs to check on DJ. Kyle Notices what is happening and begins to crawl back into the ring.

TREY BOOKER: Kyle is going to try to stop it!

Percival attempts to get DJ to respond as Kyle slowly inches closer

J.T. PRICE: He’s almost there!

Kyle winces in pain momentarily, halting him just long enough for Percival to tap Emmanuelle’s shoulder, getting her to release the hold while Serrano calls for the bell.

HOLLY PEREZ: And your winners by referee decision, the X-Factor and Grand Champions… MYOJIN! Emmanuelle! Platinum and Gold!

TREY BOOKER: DJ never tapped but it looks like Burque determined he was unconscious.

J.T. PRICE: I’m sure Phantom Troupe will have some choice words about this and their referees after that debacle.

With the match over, a dejected Hunter and Valentine begin to make their way toward the backstage area. In the ring, Emmanuelle and MYOJIN are attempting to celebrate, but it would seem as if Percival and Serrano have other ideas. The two referees vigorously shake the hands of the winners, and then seem to offer them a group hug. Emmanuelle is immediately having none of this, as she leaves the ring to retrieve her title and make her way to the back. Percival and Serrano continue to pester MYOJIN in an attempt to lure them away from the Big Drip Alliance for a place in the KaVengers, but clearly the Shining Star is not having it.

Emmanuelle reaches the entrance area and pauses, looking back to see that her partner is still refusing the offer made by Pepper Jack Cheese. Suddenly, there is a flurry of movement behind her, as someone rushes onto the stage and plants a kick to the back of the champion’s head!

TREY BOOKER: It’s Arata Asakura!

J.T. PRICE: He just dropped Emmanuelle like a bad habit!

With a scowl on his face and revenge in his heart, Arata lines up Emmanuelle for a second Raikiri, planting the move against the back of her skull just as she gets to her knees. The former champion then glares down at The Platinum Standard for a few seconds, before finally disappearing back through the curtains, a distracted MYOJIN none the wiser.

TREY BOOKER: We were expecting to hear from Arata tonight, but it would appear he decided that actions speak louder than words!

J.T. PRICE: The One Real Shogun clearly isn’t done with Emmanuelle just yet as he wants that Grand Championship back around his waist!


We see LeeAnn Morgan taping her wrists up as she closes her eyes. She nods as the commentators talk.

TREY BOOKER: LeeAnn Morgan seems focused.

J.T. PRICE: She has to be in order to bounce back after not capturing the GateKeeper Title.

LeeAnn opens her eyes as an interviewer approaches her.

CRYSTAL WARD: LeeAnn, we all saw you wrestle quite possibly the best match of your still new career here in Project Honor against Angelo Caito, but it is obvious you are upset about not being the Gatekeeper champion.

LeeAnn rips the microphone away from the interviewer.

LEEANN MORGAN: Upset? I don't think upset is the right word. I am pissed off. I am ready to rip someone's head off and if it isn't going to be Angelo then it will be DIANA tonight. DIANA is in the wrong place at the wrong time. She won't recover from this. Mentally or physically. I will make sure she remembers my name!

LeeAnn rushes off, throwing the microphone at the interviewer's feet.



HOLLY PEREZ: The following is an I Quit match and will be refereed by the already present… Larry Kachow!!

Larry has a confused look on his face.

LARRY KACHOW: Oh…. I wondered why I was pushed out here.

J.T. PRICE: Who in their right mind gives Larry control over the microphone in a wrestling match?

“The Hampster Dance Song” by Hampton The Hampster hits the speakers around the arena.

HOLLY PEREZ: Introducing first… from Okinawa, Japan… DIANA!!!

Diana skips down to the ring with a big smile on her face and when she gets into the ring she waves to the crowd in excitement.

HOLLY PEREZ: And her opponent… from Allentown, PA… LEEANN MORGAN!!!

"Sick Like Me" In This Moment plays as LeAnn Morgan walks down to the and enters under the bottom rope.

TREY BOOKER: Well both are ready to go, this is likely to be somewhat different with that idiot as ref.

LeeAnn and Diana begin circling each other but Diana puts up her hand to stop LeeAnn, Diana then turns to Larry who still looks lost, she points to him and then the timekeeper.

LARRY KACHOW: What? Oh that… DONG THE DINGER!!!

DING! DING! DING!

LeeAnn runs straight at her opponent but is taken over by a quick hip toss, she bounces up and instinctively runs again, again though she is thrown over with a hip toss. Diana drops a knee to the back of LeeAnn, followed by a second, after a third she grabs the head of LeeAnn and pulls back.

TREY BOOKER: First real attempt to make someone give up by the looks of it.

Larry looks down at the action.

LARRY KACHOW: Quit yet?

LeeAnn responds by giving Larry the finger before managing to roll to her side, breaking the hold in the process, as Diana is starting to rise she gets nailed in the side of the head by a Pele kick. LeeAnn wastes no time in getting up and dragging Diana with her, she hits Diana with a couple of kicks to the leg before taking her down with a dragon screw.

J.T. PRICE: This is a good match up but Larry looks to be in a different world.

TREY BOOKER: LeeAnn was born on Christmas day and appears to have decided Diana needs the present of leg pain.

J.T. PRICE: Adrenaline in my soul, every fight out of control.

TREY BOOKER: What?

J.T. PRICE: Oh sorry, I was reading something written on discord by a midget.

LeeAnn is stomping away relentlessly on both legs of her opponent, Larry at this point has decided to half sit and half kneel on the top turnbuckle and just watch from a distance. After the crazy number of stomps, LeeAnn pulls up the very unsteady Diana, LeeAnn runs the ropes and comes back with a brutal chop block. The impact of her running the rope seems to have unsettled Larry and he slips, landing legs split on the top turnbuckle.

LARRY KACHOW: AHHHHH…. MY FUCKING WILLY!!!!!!!!!

With tears in his eyes, Larry falls to the mat and rolls into the fetal position, through the microphone fallen near his face, you can hear soft whimpering sounds.

J.T. PRICE: KA-POW!!!

LeeAnn, after shaking her head in pure disbelief at what's just occurred returns to her fallen foe, she grabs at Diana’s leg but is pushed away as Diana sits up. LeeAnn uses the push and springboards off the rope with a flying knee to the face.

TREY BOOKER: All three are down but LeeAnn looks in control.

Without wasting a beat, LeeAnn gets the right leg of Diana, she kicks it a couple of times before wrapping it around her own… she locks in a perfect figure four leg lock!!

J.T. PRICE: Diana may quit now… LeeAnn has been working on the legs throughout.

The move is well and truly in… Diana struggles bravely for a while… Larry rolls over and in the process knocks the mic closer to the action… the mic catches it… “I QUIT”!!!

DING! DING! DING!

LeeAnn releases the hold.

HOLLY PEREZ: Due to Diana stating that she quit… the winner of the match… LEEANN MORGAN!!!

LeeAnn rolls away from the ring and chuckles at the broken bodies in there as medics begin attending.

TREY BOOKER: Are the medics here for Diana or Larry?

J.T. PRICE: Not much they can do for his problem!

Douglas Crane is once again spotted in the crowd but this time he jumps the guardrail and then kneels down as he watches the aftermath of the match.

TREY BOOKER: Look J.T.! He’s here again! The hell is wrong with this man?!

J.T. PRICE: A lot of things Trey, a lot of things, looks like he is more interested in this match than the Lexi/Stella one.

He doesn’t get involved however, just watches, focusing his attention this time on LeeAnn Morgan. Without Morgan ever realizing he was there, Crane hops the guardrail and disappears in the crowd from where he came from.


Following the previous match, we go backstage just in time to witness a strange sight. Seated on a bench and surrounded by a horde of rats, is what appears to be one half of the tag team champions, Julius Foulweather. Yet despite his appearance, this new member of the True Society has an extremely pleasant smile on his face as he rips up slices of American cheese and hand feeds the rats, one after another. When he finally begins to speak to the mischief of rats, we realize that this isn’t the more evil version of Julius we’ve seen lately, but the more gentle and friendly version known as Fineweather.

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Oh yes, eat it all up you little cutie patooties. You’re all so adorable, I could just die! giggle

Just then, Serrano Poblano and Percival Burque come around the corner and witness the display firsthand.

SERRANO: Holy Stromboli! It’s one of those bad men, Percy!

It looks like Serrano is going to turn and run away in terror, when Percy grabs him by the shoulder.

RATMAN: Not so fast, friend. Papercut says something is amiss!

They continue to watch and it appears as if Fineweather is unaware of their presence.

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Oh! Your little teeth are tickling me! tee hee

Percival then nods at Serrano and the two men cautiously approach their opponent in tonight’s main event.

RATMAN: Julius? Are you okay?

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Oh! You startled me! Thank you for asking, dear boy, but I’m fine. So very, very fine indeed.

SERRANO: Uh…you’re not acting like the dude who tried shoving forks under my fingernails.

Julius seems surprised by Serrano’s accusation.

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Oh my! Why would I ever do such a terrible thing? That sounds absolutely foul, and I just cannot abide foul things.

He then thinks for a moment before patting the empty seat next to him.

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Would you boys like to feed these adorable creatures with me? I have extra cheese…

While Percival is still apprehensive, extra cheese is all Serrano needs to hear. He plops down next to Fineweather and takes one of the slices of cheese, immediately stuffing it in his mouth. Seeing this, Percival slowly approaches and sits on the opposite side of Julius, who then hands him a piece of cheese as well.

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Gosh. There’s just nothing better than taking care of innocent animals except for one thing…

RATMAN: Please don’t say mutilation, Mr. Julius.

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Goodness sakes, no! I was going to say, the only thing better than taking care of God’s creatures is making new friends. Would…would you two like to be my friends?

Percy and Serrano look past Julius at each other with puzzled expressions. After a few seconds, Serrano takes another slice of cheese and shrugs his shoulders.

RATMAN: Yes, Julius. Yes, I think we’d like that very much. In fact, we have an entire group of friends called the KaVengers. If you’d like…maybe you could join us and be a KaVenger as well?

Julius looks back and forth between the two men as the smile on his face slowly grows larger. Then, without warning, he puts one arm around Serrano and the other around Percival.

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Oh my…I…I wasn’t expecting anything like this….YES! Yes I would love to be a member of your team! Do you sing songs together? Hold hands? Do arts and crafts?

RATMAN: Um…some of those things. We can take a vote on holding hands though…

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Oh joyous day! Oh blessed baby Jesus! I’ve haven’t been this happy since…since…since I started feeding these lovely creatures!

Julius tightens his arms around Serrano and Percival’s shoulders, pulling them in even closer in a tight embrace. Seconds later, someone else enters the scene as Julius’ tag team partner comes around the corner.

SLADE CASTLE: Julius? What the fuck, man? Why are you hugging those two freaks? I swear, if you’re gonna double cross me…

Upon seeing Slade Castle, Percival and Serrano both leap to their feet and dash away in the opposite direction.

RATMAN: It’s the other mean one! Run as fast as your legs can carry you, Spice Master!

Serrano and Percival run from the scene as fast as their feet will carry them, and after watching their retreat, Slade approaches Fineweather with a confused expression.

SLADE CASTLE: Again…what the fuck, man?

JULIUS FINEWEATHER: Hello there. If you’re interested in friendship and fuzzy animal companions, you should join me. I only ask that you watch your language…

Slade’s confusion turns into a scowl as he rears back with his hand and then slaps Julius hard across the face. For a moment, a blank look comes over him, but slowly, that mix of surprise and pain turns into a scowl of his own.

JULIUS FOULWEATHER: Ah, brother Castle. You’ve arrived just in time. I thought I’d have a little snack before we exterminate the human versions…

He then leans down to grab the nearest rat, clutching it in his hand. With Slade watching on, he raises the animal upwards and opens his mouth wide, sticking the rat’s head between his sharpened teeth…

When Slade suddenly strikes out at Julius’ hand, knocking the rat back down to the floor.

SLADE CASTLE: That’s it. After tonight, titles or no titles, it’s time we figured this shit out. I can’t have a partner who’s a goddamn choir boy one minute and a sociopath the next. Now get your shit together! We’ve got a match to prepare for!

Julius glares at his partner for a few seconds as the mischief of rats scurry away to another part of the arena. He then rises, with that evil fog once again smothering his eyes, before he finally gives Slade a nod.

JULIUS FOULWEATHER: Let’s go eradicate some vermin once and for all…




With Proving Ground returning from a commercial break, the silence is rudely broken up by the musical stylings of Lindsey Stirling, “Shatter Me” filling the air as it echoes the impending appearance of Sonya Benson.

The crowd, in their eternally heated state, would let out loud boos in preparation. But rather than Benson, the appearance of Giovanni would elicit a strained groan from the thousands in attendance, and probably the millions watching at home.

TREY BOOKER: Oh god, not this shit again…

But rather than going to the ring with Calliope draped on his arm, he’d wait a few seconds as Johnny Levy appeared onto the stage with a gigantic grin of the shit-eating variety, flanked by Barlon Mando. And last, but certainly not least it would be Sonya Benson making her appearance with her own bodyguard Smith who could challenge Mando in chest-size.

With the team complete, they’d take their sweet time moving down the ramp, Giovanni busy wistfully looking into the ether for divine inspiration, Levy busy trying to find babies to kiss, and Sonya Benson merely looking utterly devoid of joy at the knowledge they were at a wrestling show.

TREY BOOKER: As if we were happy the first time around, we now have the second time this night that we have to see these guys show up.

J.T. PRICE: I’m always happy to see these three, they’re the only ones trying to bring some class to this company! Well, except Benson, she scares me.

TREY BOOKER: She scares all of us, Price.

Having gotten their way into the ring, Giovanni and Levy would playfully offer the microphone to each other before offering it right back to the other. For a second they offered it to Benson, who’d only share a dry stare before the two of them would continue palling about.

GIOVANNI: GIVE IT UP FOR THE AMAZING JOHNNY LEVY!

Levy would jump on the turnbuckle stretching his arms to soak in the love, which again came in the form of the loudest possible boos and the need for everyone to take a hearing test after the night was up.

Especially Levy, who blew some more kisses towards his adoring public.

JOHNNY LEVY: NO! GIVE IT UP FOR THE BRILLIANT, GIOVANNI!

Giovanni would drop to his knees with stretched arms, as he too soaked up the ‘love’ radiating in fiery anger towards the two of them.

GIOVANNI: GIVE IT UP FOR THE BEAUTIFUL SONYA BENSON!

JOHNNY LEVY: GIVE IT UP FOR THE BEAUTIFUL SONYA BENSON!

Somehow the boos managed to peak even louder, as Benson was the only one that returned an appropriate gesture of disdain towards the people that shared their hatred towards her. The only one in the building that had an equal hatred towards the fans as they had towards her.

Letting a beat fall, Giovanni and Levy would for a second time pal around trying to decide who would do the speaking, but eventually Giovanni decided to take the lead.

GIOVANNI: Now everyone is undoubtedly waiting for an explanation of my genius moves at Unbreakable Resolution, and for the people that do not understand the promises I made ahead of it, well, let me just tell, these two are the start of my resolutions for this year.

Gesturing his hand towards Benson and Levy, he’d not wait for the ‘cheers’ to rain down yet again, instead continuing to speak.

GIOVANNI: I made the resolution that 2022 wasn’t just going to be the year of Giovanni, but the year where I turn this disappointing ‘sport’ into a true artistic spectacle, one that true connoisseurs of artistry could look towards as inspiration, rather than an example of the lowest common denominator somehow being made dumber.

JOHNNY LEVY: And if we wanted to make people dumb, well, I’m sure the public school system already has that covered…

GIOVANNI: Well said, my good friend! But I can’t just do this alone, I must humbly admit that I’m a brilliant man with a brilliant mind, but I know there are people in this company that have the same ideas as me, and rather than fight them, I will work with them to help make this place a true cosmopolitan delight for the eyes.

JOHNNY LEVY: Trust me Gio, I not only have major plans for Proving Ground, and after that I will set my sights on transforming this beautiful nation!

The crowd would eventually zone out as the two of them would continue going back and forth with idea after idea, ensuring to fill the other one’s ears with much positive reinforcement.

Until Sonya Benson grew tired and gave one of them a nudge to get to the point.

JOHNNY LEVY: Apologies Sonya, completely forgot that you’re still here too. We’re not just here to announce our brilliant plans, because for this group of us to be able to co-exist, we need a show of unity, a proof of our quality, and most importantly a brand image to market to the world.

GIOVANNI: Marketing is right, and we found the perfect individual for it. So all of you please look at the entrance and give a warm welcome to Triple L!

To the absolute dead silence of everyone, from behind the curtains would appear a well dressed man looking smart and with a grin that could somehow match Levy’s. Shuffling their way to the ring, they’d make their way into the ring and accept a microphone for themselves, going the distance by climbing every turnbuckle to experience their first ever moment in a wrestling ring.

LARRY LIVINGSTONE: Thank you everyone, great to feel the love from my hometown crowd!

The crowd would somehow, inexplicably, let out a cautious cheer for the man in the ring, if only because they were from the same town.

GIOVANNI: That’s right everybody, we’ve found the only competent man in this dumpster fire of a city, and that is none other than your own ‘Litigious’ Larry Livingstone!

JOHNNY LEVY: We’ve already decided to call him Triple L for short.

Larry would hold his heart with a big smile as he accepted the love from the two artists, and with a bad case of swollen heart he’d raise the microphone to his lips again with a slightly emotional stammer.

Triple L: You two are really too kind, and of course you too Miss. Benson. Your generous checks have allowed me to pay off three years of lapsed alimony payments, so you have my deepest thanks for your assistance.

Changing his demeanor ever so slightly, ‘Triple L’ would show a little bit of focus.

Triple L: But of course, these three generous patrons haven’t just brought me in here to live my boyhood dream of being paid enough to leave this hellscape for good, they have entrusted me with their business as their official legal counsel, and as my first job as their counsel I have been trusted with the honorable job of naming this glorious trio of dazzling diehards.

GIOVANNI: That’s right, we’ve actually decided to treat you troglodytes with the official naming of this brilliant stable of artistic crusaders!

Nodding a little bit, Triple L would smile and raise the microphone to his lips once more with a deep inhale and preparation to make it known to the world

Triple L: Johnny Levy, Giovanni, and Sonya Benson will today be known as… as… as…

The legal counsel would start hyperventilating as they were hit by a sudden bout of performance anxiety, Levy was quick to offer his support with a few slaps on his shoulder and a few words of inspirational advice.

JOHNNY LEVY: How about we give Larry a quick applause, everyone. It’s not every day that you’re blessed with one of your own actually being able to do something worthwhile!

The crowd booed vitriolically, but a half-hearted golf clap started in the hope that it would eventually lead to all of them shutting up permanently. And with Triple L having regained his senses and taken a quick puff of his inhaler, he’d raise the microphone again.

Triple L: My apologies, I’m good now. Thank you Levy, you’re a true American inspiration as always… Now without further ado, I would like to announce to you the official name of the official team of Sonya Benson, Johnny Levy, and Giovanni… And the name that they will go by will be nothing other than…

The camera would suddenly cut towards the announce table, with two very mentally frayed announcers awkwardly cutting the announcement short.

TREY BOOKER: I’m sorry everyone, It seems the network is literally screaming at us to go to a commercial break right now, we’ll be back in a few minutes!

J.T. PRICE: You’re effing kidding me?! I wanted to know their stable na–


A pot-bellied man is seen sitting on his porch looking dejected, before a young black man in a red shirt comes to meet him.

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: What’s with the sad face, Bobby-Joe?

BOBBY-JOE: With my insurance rates being so expensive, I can’t buy new guns, ammo, or Confederate flags to put on the back of my truck, Jake!

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: What the f-?! I mean… Uh, well… You know with State Farm’s great rates and custom-tailored plans, you’ll save more money on your home, car, and life insurance. And you’ll have more money to spend on the things you care about.

BOBBY-JOE: That’s great news, Jake!

In a fit of excitement, Bobby Joe quickly jumps up to his feet, takes out his Glock 19 and starts kissing it.

BOBBY-JOE: You hear that, Glocky? We’re getting a new member to the family!

Shooting the gun wildly in the air, Bobby Joe’s wife and twelve kids are quick to join him on the lawn for an impromptu satellite dish shooting contest.

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: I swear that goddamn lizard never has to deal with this shit…

“Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.”

-

The commercial break cuts to a display of an oversized man gorging himself onto a hamburger. But with every bite, the burger grows larger.

“MEAT”

The man does yet another bite, but to his shock the burger becomes larger for his mouth to eat in one bite.

“MEAAAAT”

Now the man becomes increasingly desperate, as his hands tremble he takes bite after bite he becomes increasingly hopeless as the burger continues to tumesce into gargantuan sizes.

“MEAAAAAAAAAAAAT”

Eventually, the man clutches his chest in a pained grimace before falling backwards from his chair and getting smothered by the room sized hamburger that he failed to finish fully.

“ARBY’S, WE HAVE THE MEAT!”

–

The ad-break continues, and now we find Christopher Walken driving a muscle car down a long deserted road that stretches for endless miles of desert.

CHRISTOPHER WALKEN: You know, when I am driving through the deserts of the lapsed mind in between my jobs as an actor and my favourite meat-obsessed burger place. Even I, Christopher Walken, can suffer from bloated feelings and a sudden urge to use the bathroom.

Raising a small bottle, Walken would coolly keep his eyes on the road.

CHRISTOPHER WALKEN: But now with Mega-Ultra-Anti-Lax, I can stuff all the greasy unpalatable crap into my stomach without a care in the world! So that I can keep on driving down this long and lonesome desert of the unfettered mindspace.

“When you make poor dietary choices, there’s always MUALax! MUALax, the solution to all of life’s gastro-intestinal problems!

(Warning: MUALax may cause: bloating, profuse sweating, heart-palpitations, delusions of grandeur, headaches, greater diarrhea, bloody postulum, explosive diarrhea, an enjoyment of Johnny Levy movies, projectile vomiting, sudden bouts of narcolepsy, extreme emotional swings, a desire to watch dark matches, tremors, restless leg syndrome, and potential coma and full organ failure are among the potential side-effects of MUALax, please ask your doctor whether or not MUALax is the drug right for you. The creators of MUALax are not liable to any and all side-effects.)

CHRISTOPHER WALKEN: Thanks, MUALax!

–

The image cuts again, back to Jake from State Farm, who is talking to someone on the other end of a phone with a heavily frustrated frown on his face.

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: LISTEN TO ME, I WANT YOU TO GET ME A BETTER GIG THAN THIS FU–

Jake would notice the camera rolling and put on his perfect smile, slowly walking towards the camera with the camera matching cadence.

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: In today’s world, with prices becoming ever greater, what one really needs is a good neighbor. And at State Farm, our advisors are standing by 24/7 to assist you to get great rates on all your insurance needs.

The recognizable jingle would play but be hopelessly drowned out by gunshots, and to the sound of shotguns being racked and fired off in the distance, Jake decided to forgo all acting and start running as fast as he could.

“Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.”

–

We see pictures of past generations of Ford Bronco confidently driving over all sorts of terrain, before the picture is slowly stripped away to show the latest rendition of an All-American classic forming before your very eyes.

M. Hamill: (Not an Actor) The new Ford Bronco is not only a feast for the eyes, but it’s so light it feels like you’re flying in a spaceship!

J. Jackson: (Not an Actor) The new 2022 Ford Bronco is a spectacle, it truly is the tits!

N. Cage: (Not an Actor) -Incoherent screaming into the void-

M. Tyson: (Not an Actor) You know, I like really really love the Bronco because a larger man like me can fit in it without any problems, you know.

O.J. Simpson: (Not an Actor) Ever since the 90s I’ve been a fan of the Ford Bronco, I can fit so many ill-fitting gloves in the glovebox!

Narrator: Be like these normal ordinary citizens and buy yourself a full-blooded American workhorse, buy the Ford Bronco!

“Don’t buy tough, buy Bronco tough!”

–

Floating in the ether between life and death, we find Jake from State Farm in tattered rags of clothes and slowly opening blood-shot eyes.

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: …Last time I'll try and borrow toilet paper from those Charmin bears.

GOD: Jake, my son, you have come to me at last

Jake would open his eyes wider, looking upon the incorporeal shape glowing down from the heavens

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: Am I, Am I dead?!

GOD: Not yet, but nearly so, my son.

A slow stream of tears would start to trickle down the cheeks of Jake, a mixture of relief and happiness washing over his visage.

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: D-Does that mean I get to go to heaven, now?

GOD: No Jake, perhaps one day, but you must still go out there, for your work giving cheap rates for home and auto insurance isn’t finished yet.

With a thunderclap, Jake would find himself falling down and down with the vision of earth creeping closer in the distance. Jake would grimace one final time, before letting out his deepest shout.

JAKE FROM STATE FARM: FUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUUU, GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

“Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.”



As Proving Ground returns from a painfully lengthy commercial break, we find Johnny Levy still on the microphone with anybody close to ringside barely holding onto the last vestiges of their sanity.

JOHNNY LEVY: -sity. So, as I’ve been saying since I first decided to grace this company with my presence, something must be done about the bias, the discrimination, the lack of equality. I mean, just take a look at the main event scene throughout the history of not just Proving Ground, but Project: Honor as a whole? When was the last time a talented Jewish actor held a belt around here?

He pauses to gesture at his own perfect face, before pointing at Giovanni.

JOHNNY LEVY: Or a brilliant, misunderstood.. What are you, Italian?

GIOVANNI: At least one-fifteenth the last time I checked.

JOHNNY LEVY: Anyway, when was the last time a brilliant artist like my friend here won a title bout on this middling show?

Moving his hand to point at the woman who seemed to hold nothing but disdain and contempt for the sport itself. It certainly showed on her face.

JOHNNY LEVY: How about a beautiful, wealthy, classy Prime champion named - for the sake of argument - ‘Sonya Benson’? Ever have one of those? Well, don’t rack your brains too hard, my dear audience. I have the answers for yo-

He is cut off - finally - by an official from ringside, who looks to be explaining how much trouble Levy will be in if their grandstanding bumps the main event off-air. One can almost hear the words ‘breach of contract’ and ‘lawsuit’ shouted over the boos of the crowd; to the visible excitement of the group’s new lawyer. Whatever is said seems to have the desired effect, and Levy finally tosses the microphone to the referee with a broad, toothy grin and wave to the audience.

But, just as the microphone makes it into the referee’s hand, it’s ripped away by Sonya’s bodyguard, Smith, who hands it over to her. An enormous eruption of jeers greet her as she tries to speak but pauses and sneers at all the unkind things being yelled at her.

J.T. PRICE: Oh my god, yes, YES, she will grace us with her verbal gold, her brilliant utterance, attune your ears to the hottest woman in this world and the worlds beyond. Seek refuge in which she speaketh! GOD she’s so hot!

SONYA BENSON: I’m going to be the better person here and not insult you with the same slander you’re delivering to me. To those in the locker room, my offer still stands. One million dollars to train me in the fantastic sport of butt touching and knuckle dragging. There has to be someone back there who’s made terrible life and financial decisions, after all you’re wrestlers, or need some pills, this money will cover it. Jeez. Aside from addressing the misplaced honor in the back, I’m going to use the class and notoriety of our fine, exquisite group forthwith to begin reverse engineering operations on you mindless selplatoids. You’ve been engineered to crave mindless barbarism under the guise of sport. I’m crestfallen over this and have decided to fight back against the poison this sport seeps into the masses. And it begins here in the city LeBron ghosted. With what, you may ask? A little class, birthed by one of the classiest men. Ahem. I now regale you with Willam Shakespear’s, Hamlet.

Food and drinks are thrown in at her but they’re knocked away by her allies as she courageously continues, so stunning and so brave.

SONYA BENSON:

KING CLAUDIUS Take thy fair hour, Laertes; time be thine, And thy best graces spend it at thy will! But now, my cousin Hamlet, and my son,--

HAMLET [Aside] A little more than kin, and less than kind.

KING CLAUDIUS How is it that the clouds still hang on you?

HAMLET Not so, my lord; I am too much i' the sun.

QUEEN GERTRUDE Good Hamlet, cast thy nighted colour off, And let thine eye look like a friend on Denmark. Do not for ever with thy vailed* lids, Seek for thy noble father in the dust: Thou know'st ; all that lives must die

HAMLET Ay, madam, it is common.

Giovanni and Levy are just starting to play the parts mentioned in the recitation when her mic is finally, mercifully shut off. To get even with this uncalled for ending, Sonya does the petty thing and power spikes the mic like a football, ruining it.

TREY BOOKER: Well, after going over schedule for twenty minutes, it seems that we’re finally ready for the next match…

J.T. PRICE: Sucks for whoever has to follow this moment of greatness!


HOLLY PEREZ: The following contest is a Lucha Trios Tag Team Match scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring…GIOVANNI…“SUPERSTAR” JOHNNY LEVY…and SONYA BENSON…they are the team of…um…whatever!

A pyrotechnic explosion of rainbow proportions cues Applause by Lady Gaga to kick up through the sound system. Standing dead center of the stage is "The Animaniac" Archimedes J. Manson. He's got his trusty BONKERZOOKA propped up on his shoulder as he dances down the ramp and towards the ring. As he jumps and bops to the music, he fires the BONKERZOOKA into the crowd and drenches various fans with cream pies. He drops the BONKERZOOKA as he gets to the ring and runs up the steps, down the apron, and slingshots himself into the ring where more dancing and just plain foolishness goes down until the match begins.

HOLLY PEREZ: And their opponents…introducing first…a man of many nicknames…ARCHIMEDES J. MANSON…live from Cleveland, Ohio…it’s Saturday morning!

As Archie continues to dance around, “Two Headed Hydra” begins to play, signaling the arrival of his first partner. Swindle Shelldrake makes his way toward the ring, looking much more focused than Manson, as Holly continues to provide the introductions.

HOLLY PEREZ: And his partner from Cardiff, Wales…weighing in at one hundred ninety-one pounds… “The Kraken…SWINDLE SHELLDRAKE!!!

Nonstop by Drake hits as the fans rise to their feet, watching the curtain while cheering. T.J. Thompson marches out onto the ramp, pounding his chest while shouting at the crowd with contagious energy.

Chants of "HIP" are heard as he high fives fans on his way down to the ring. At the bottom of the ramp, Thompson singles out a fan, and begins shaking uncontrollably as he raises his hand up. The crowd plays along with it as if Thompson is charging up before fiving a massive high five to the fan. The fan swings his arm back from the impact of the high five while Thompson fires up the crowd before sliding into the ring.

TJ briefly poses on the top turnbuckle as the crowd continues to cheer before waiting for his opponent/the match to start with a huge grin on his face.

HOLLY PEREZ: And finally, fighting out of the Hip House and weighing in at one hundred eighty pounds…The Hip Beast…TJ THOMPSON!!!

DING! DING! DING!

TREY BOOKER: This should be an interesting contest as I don’t believe we’ve ever had a Trios Match under Lucha Libre rules on Proving Ground in the past. Care to explain the rules to our fans at home, J.T?

J.T. PRICE: No. No, I don't think I will.

TREY BOOKER: Alrighty then! The main thing to keep in mind is that normal tags are not necessary. When one competitor leaves the ring either by force or by choice, one of their partners can immediately enter as the legal competitor!

It looks as if Archie and Giovanni are going to kick things off as El Puma attempts to remind both men about the rules in the Spanish tongue. While Archie seems enthralled with El Puma’s ability to navigate his native language, Giovanni cannot be bothered as he blatantly reaches out to slap Manson across the face. This causes Archie’s eyes to grow wide and he quickly responds with a slap of his own! Giovanni returns the slap…then one from Manson…back and forth they go in the center of the ring until Archie strangely slaps his own face. Then, when it’s Giovanni’s turn, he slaps himself as well before he can even realize what’s happened.

While the Artiste is stunned and confused, Archie whips him into the ropes and then connects with a nice hesitation dropkick on the rebound. Giovanni tries to scramble back to his feet, but Archie is already springboarding off the middle rope to come back with a twisting cross body block! Archie is moving around the ring so fast that Giovanni is like a leaf in a storm. He finally tries to connect with a wild swing, but Manson ducks underneath it and responds by giving Giovanni an atomic wedgie! The Artiste cannot help by try to fix his tights, giving Archie the chance to go for a schoolboy roll up!

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT!

Immediately following the escape, Giovanni scrambles to his knees and wobbles to his corner for support, pressing himself against Levy’s lower body like a scared child. Angered by seeing his partner treated this way, Johnny accepts this as a tag and enters the ring, sizing up Archie like a filet mignon. Levy moves in slowly with his hand raised and Archie responds by mimicking his movements. Finally, the two men lock hands, but Levy immediately fires a kick into Manson’s gut. After stunning him, he then grabs Archie by the hair and flings him to the floor between the top and middle ropes.

As the crowd showers down a chorus of boos, Levy smirks and showboats, completely forgetting that he has just allowed one of Archie’s partners to enter the match. He turns back around just in time to see Swindle Shelldrake rushing towards him with a bicycle knee strike! The shot sends Levy staggering backwards and off the ropes, allowing Swindle to catch him with a Saito Suplex on the rebound!

TREY BOOKER: I understand it’s in their nature to be arrogant, but Levy and Giovanni had better get their heads in the game!

J.T. PRICE: Not to worry, Trey. The ravishing Sonya Benson hasn’t even been in the match yet. God, she’s so hot.

Levy gets back to his feet and takes a swing and Swindle, who catches his arm and twists him into a hammerlock. Shelldrake keeps hold of Johnny in that position before grabbing one of his fingers and bending it in the wrong direction. He then releases the hammerlock, but the pain in Levy’s digits keeps him from firing back. Swindle continues to bend Levy’s fingers in directions they were not meant to go, nearly putting The Superstar down on his knees. Out of desperation, Levy finally reaches up with his free hand and jabs a finger in Swindle’s eye, forcing him to release Levy’s other hand.

As Johnny is shaking the feeling back into his fingers, Swindle charges in and Levy leapfrogs over him. Shelldrake spins back only to be met with a sudden superkick. Having regained some momentum, Levy then slaps on a side headlock and follows it up with several punches to stun his opponent. He then connects with a short clothesline to put Swindle on the mat before quickly making his way to the ropes. Levy steps out of the ring without bothering to make a tag, and Giovanni is quick to springboard into the ring, hitting Shelldrake with a forearm just as he’s getting back on his feet.

Giovanni hits the ropes and Swindle tries to counter with a clothesline on the return, but Gio ducks underneath and counters that with a float over DDT. Swindle is clearly in trouble, and Giovanni cannot resist the opportunity to hold his opponent’s arms behind his back and force him towards his corner, where Sonya Benson greets him with a hard slap from the apron. The joy on Levy and Giovanni’s faces is so apparent that Sonya winds up for a second slap, but this time Swindle ducks away and she ends up paint brushing Giovanni instead.

Swindle then grabs Giovanni by the head and raises his legs to kick off of Johnny Levy’s body, dropping Gio with The Cult Classic! Infuriated by this, Levy charges into the ring but TJ Thompson rushes in to cut him off with a running European uppercut. Swindle and TJ then whip both Giovanni and Levy into the ropes, hitting both men with simultaneous back body drops that send them sailing to the floor outside of the ring. Sonya Benson has a concerned look on her face as she realizes that both her partners are down and that legally, she should be entering the ring. Her hesitation only gives Swindle and TJ the chance to grab the top rope and bring her inside with a surprise slingshot.

After Sonya crashes onto the mat with a thud, Swindle and TJ take measure of their opponents on the outside of the ring. They hit the opposite ring ropes to get a running start and both men dive over the top, with TJ crashing onto Giovanni with his Hip With The Drip coffin drop while Swindle connects on Levy with a tope con giro! All four men are down on the outside, leaving Sonya Benson all alone as Archimedes re-enters the ring…

TREY BOOKER: That was some amazing teamwork by Thompson and Shelldrake! Now Sonya is all alone in the ring!

J.T. PRICE: If Archie touches one hair on her saintly head, I swear I’ll get in the ring myself!

Archie has a big smile as he enters the ring, but instead of immediately going for some offense, he drops to all fours and crawls toward Sonya like a dog. Benson has no idea what to do about this, but thankfully for her, Archie only chooses to lift his back leg as if he were peeing on a fire hydrant. While the crowd appreciates his antics, they also seem to light a fire in Benson, who fires off a hard slap to Archie’s face and follows up with several awkward kicks and stomps. There isn’t much grace in the untrained woman’s offense, but she’s so fired up with humiliation that they are still effective.

Back outside of the ring, TJ and Giovannia are exchanging rights and lefts until Thompson finally gets the upper hand and sends his opponent flipping over the guardrail. While Swindle and Levy continue to brawl, TJ returns to the ring and grabs Sonya in a rear waistlock to pull her away from his partner. TJ then lifts her into the air for a back suplex, but as he drops back, Archie springs up to grab her neck and they hit Benson with a back suplex/neckbreaker combo. The impact rocks Sonya, who wisely rolls under the bottom rope to escape.

Swindle then shoves Levy back into the ring under the bottom rope, before Giovanni grabs him from behind and shoves him into the ring post. Swindle is dazed, but he’s still able to fire back at Giovanni with an elbow strike, and the two men continue to go back and forth at ringside. As Sonya is getting back on her feet, TJ uses that opportunity to spring to the top turnbuckle and then dive to the outside, catching her with a diving crossbody. This leaves Levy and Archie alone in the ring, and it looks like Manson has the advantage as he lifts Johnny into a fireman’s carry for his Killing Joke cutter…

TREY BOOKER: This will be it! The extended members of Big Drip are about to take the win!

Just then, Archie seems to take notice of El Puma watching him, and for no rhyme or reason, he drops Levy off his shoulders. With very audible barking noises, Archie begins to chase after El Puma in a classic ‘dog chasing cat’ moment like we might see while watching Tom and Jerry. Confused and somewhat frightened, El Puma runs in circles with Archie wildly chasing after him and barking at the top of his lungs.

Not one to pass on an opportunity, Levy steps in to plant a hard kick against Archie’s midsection to put an end to the shenanigans. He then hooks both of Archie’s arms, lifts him off the mat, and drives him back down face first with the Roll Credits! He rolls Manson over for the pin and whether it’s because he’s flustered or has been paid off by Sonya Benson, El Puma drops down to make a quick count…

ONE!TWO!THREE!

DING! DING! DING!

Swindle and TJ rush back into the ring the moment they see Archie in trouble, but the referee’s count is too fast for them to effectively break up the pin. Johnny Levy immediately rolls outside to join Giovanni and Sonya with a huge, shit-eating grin on his face as Holly Perez gives us the official decision.

HOLLY PEREZ: Your winners of the match by way of pinfall…GIOVANNI, SONYA BENSON, AND “SUPERSTAR” JOHNNY LEVY!!!

As the three teammates make their way back up the ramp to celebrate, Swindle and TJ give El Puma the evil eye. The luchador quickly offers his hand to them in a show of respect, but his offer of friendship is denied as Shelldrake kicks him in the gut and then hooks his arms, driving him to the mat with Violent Salvage! El Puma is down and out, but that doesn’t stop TJ from springing off the turnbuckles and falling backwards on top of him, hitting Hip With The Drip. With the inept referee out of the picture, Swindle and TJ then turn their attention to Archie, who has recovered enough to begin dancing at ringside. Even TJ Thompson, who loves to have fun, seems a bit put off by Archie’s nonchalant attitude regarding their loss.

As Swindle and TJ continue to watch on, at a loss for how to handle their partner, Archimedes' reluctant manager, Anastasia Poe makes her way to ringside. The nearest camera is able to pick up her words as she chastises him for not taking things more seriously. With a confused and somewhat sad look on his face, Archie starts making his way back up the ramp with Anastasia continuing to berate his attitude.

TREY BOOKER: Quite a bit to unpack there, but it would seem that Manson’s manager and teammates are not very fond of his antics tonight. While this crowd was thoroughly entertained, it may have cost them the match.

J.T. PRICE: Don’t be ridiculous. We have been gifted with the greatest threesome in the history of this business, and I’m not talking about anyone associated with Big Drip. Johnny Levy, Giovanni, and Sonya Benson are the future of Proving Ground, and they showed us why here tonight!


Following the three-on-three tag contest, the following footage comes from the backstage area in the parking lot. Pulling into the parking lot, then right into the garage is a black Lamborghini Veneno. The car pulls into a parking spot and the engine shuts off, and the door swings open to reveal a hoodied up individual to which they exit the vehicle and closes the door behind them. They walk past the camera and towards the hallway, with the cameraman following. The figure walks the hallway and enters Gorilla Position. They remove their jacket, revealing the back of the person, revealing it's a male with black hair that goes to his shoulders. He gives a thumbs up before walking through the curtain.

♫ "I've got sunshine in my pocket, I'm just right here in my zone
I've got Sade in my tape deck, I'm just movin' right along
All these haters really love me, they just pretend that they don't
'Cause I've got sunshine in my pocket, I'm just right here in my zone
In my zone" ♫

"In My Zone" kicks in and the fans go to their feet. Out through the curtains is a returning Brandon Hendrix, who hasn't been in Project Honor following his loss at Clash For The Cup on November 14th to Tara Fenix in the Round Robin Tournament finals. Taking the stage, Brandon looks around at the fans that packed the Rocket Mortgage Fieldhouse, and he cannot help himself but smile some. He gets himself serious, nodding his head as he stands in position in the middle of the stage before tossing his arms to the side, roaring as fire explodes on both sides of the ramp. He rubs his hands together before smacking them together, powering himself forward, getting another reaction from the Project Honor fans as he makes his way down the ramp. Giving some fist bumps to the fans in the front row, Brandon paces ringside before jumping onto the apron then onto the second rope and yells, beating on his chest to create another reaction from the crowd before jumping into the ring. He grabs a microphone from the ring announcer, listening to his theme song end.

Crowd: "BRANDON! BRANDON! BRANDON! BRANDON! BRANDON! BRANDON!"

BRANDON HENDRIX: ... You see, November 14th, 2021, I thought I was done here. I felt like I didn't belong. I allowed myself to become something I'm not, and I couldn't handle looking at myself in the mirror anymore. I knew I had to go away and grow up into something better. After Clash For The Cup, I changed, got into my car, and left. It wasn't till a few days later that I saw the press conference after the show and how Indy wished I didn't keep my word.

We actually talked after I left about him wanting me to come back. I told him I'll come back when I'm ready. Well, after sixty six days of traveling the world, growing up some, hell it was just my 24th birthday recently so big ups, and competing against some of the best across the world, I knew……

I was ready."

The crowd cheers on as Brandon rubs his forehead.

BRANDON HENDRIX: So let's start with what brought me back. There are a few things that did. One was the superstars. We’ve got the best talent in the world that I love and love to work with. Arata Asakura, Casanova English, Swindle Shelldrake, MYOJIN, Kyle Valentine, DJ Hunter, hell, maybe even Mark Hunter when or if he returns. Speaking of Mark, allow me to take this opportunity to publicly apologize. You see, back when we were booked to face each other on that episode of Proving Ground, I said things of one man's family that shouldn't have, nor even been mentioned. I know you wanted to keep them a secret so I'm sorry. Maybe one day, under better circumstances, we get a rematch.

Another reason for my return is because I don't want my name here to be left in ruins. Leaving three wins to six losses and a draw haunted me. Not securing a championship tormented me. I won championships across the world, but not here. I refuse to let that happen now. Before, I was very picky in what I went for, but then I was taught a very valuable lesson by one of the greats this business has ever seen: "you think the tier of the Championship means the most, but in reality it's the man that either makes the Championship great or makes it bad". I haven't done this in a while, but let's give it a try.

Now I have a GRAND opportunity to provide for my family, and when I see that 'X' lined up, I might FACTOR in the fact that to be a WARRIOR in this quest for gold brings a RISING fire that burns within my veins. But, there's always the chance I get brought to Fallout and have to go there. Then there's a PRIME example that maybe being NOBLE works best. Try to rack up wins and make my ASCENSION to the top of the card. Or maybe, I will go and become the GATEKEEPER of Project Honor, maybe go and play TAG with a friend in a quest for team dominance, or maybe, just maybe, I will create my LEGACY once and for all."

Brandon chuckles as he continues talking.

BRANDON HENDRIX: And the last thing that brought me back… was you fans. You see, I normally spent my time out here as the bad guy, getting booed and all that, but as time progressed, you guys started cheering me on. Maybe it's why I started changing, maybe it's why I needed to go away too because deep down I hated myself for letting each and everyone of you down. Well, I'm back, and I'm not letting you guys down again.

The crowd cheers Brandon on as he nods to them and speaks again.

BRANDON HENDRIX: I guess there's only one thing left, and that's next week I put on my boots, my trunks, wrist tape, whatever it takes and step inside this ring and compete once again. Ladies and gentlemen…. "The Don" is back.

Brandon smirks as he drops the microphone. What he doesn't realize is someone running down the ramp. Wait a minute, it's Johnny Levy! He grabs a steel chair and enters the ring. Brandon turns around to thank the fans, but gets blasted in the skull by the steel chair, dropping him. The crowd starts booing Levy as he kneels beside Brandon.

JOHNNY LEVY: This is MY script! You are taking the lead role’s screen time! No more. I'm the heart of the movie, but now we get to see yours!

He raises the chair up, but is stopped by two referees. More follow suit as they tell Levy to back off and leave the ring. A smirk comes to his face as he slides under the rope. He takes a bow as the fans boo hard. Meanwhile, Brandon slowly leans up and turns, a dazed but angered look on his face as the segment ends.


Douglas Crane is in the backstage area, near the loading dock where the lighting isn’t the best but it seems this is the reason he has chosen this spot. He stands in front of us, head hung low, arms down. Despite not being booked tonight, he is wearing his wrestling gear and has the red leather apron on, which normally means he’s getting ready to chop someone up… Figuratively speaking of course… we hope.


DOUGLAS CRANE: At Season’s beatings we came up short of the goal. We could not get past TJ Thompson, who squeaked by us and that has been driving us crazy since. You see, we were on a clear path from the moment we joined Project: Honor. I wanted only one thing here, only one title, the Warrior Rising title, and up until that match the only thing that was stopping us from getting it was the people running Project: Honor… But then we go and mess up by losing to TJ, we stumbled on a speed bump we were not meant to stumble on and now we stand here, at a crossroads, not knowing what to do next… Do I go left, and still go after the champ? Do we go right and go after the four people that were given the chance that should have been ours in the first place? Do I make a U-turn and go get revenge on Thompson? Or do we go straight ahead, to a road we do not know where it leads to…?

He pauses as he takes a moment to examine his gloved hands, which are covered in blood. He smiles and then brings his head up, staring right at the camera; his piercing blue eyes making you jump back, don’t deny it, you did.

DOUGLAS CRANE: Actually, I do know where that road leads to. Turns out the powers that be have finally taken notice and have told us what the next step is to get back on track to our goal. At the next Proving Ground, I will get to face one of two possible opponents who are also in the hunt for what we are after and so we went out there tonight to get a closer look… But that wasn’t enough, the next show is too far away, we just couldn’t wait to get our hands on them… someone wanted to be released and so I obliged.

He kneels to reveal the unconscious bodies of Lexi Gold and LeeAnn Morgan, who appears to have been put through a pallet and has her head busted open. Lexi is not bloodied, just unconscious.

DOUGLAS CRANE: Both put up quite a fight, but eventually we were able to put Lexi to sleep; Morgan however, needed a firmer hand. Rest easy now ladies, in two weeks, one of you will get your chance to get us back, but I can guarantee you this now… We’re done stumbling around, our goal is the Warrior Rising Championship and we will not let anyone else come between us and it any longer. Not the two of you, not Gallagher, Giovanni, Benson or Jade… and definitely not the champion himself, Casanova English…

He stands and simply walks away; the lights in the dock start to flicker and that inner voice of his is heard again…




The remix of C.R.A.S.H theme hits and Officer Greyfield comes from the back and twirls his nightstick while making his way to the ring, he hits the steel steps with his nightstick and enters the ring and waits for the match to start.

TREY BOOKER: One of the most disgusting wrestlers we have on our roster today…

J.T. PRICE: Even I'd have to agree on that, are we sure he's even a real cop? What's to stop him from trying to arrest Tara after their match, even?!

TREY BOOKER: Implying that he might even be in good enough shape to try it, speaking of Tara Fenix...

Every light throughout the arena flickers out while the crowd gives a premature cheer; when the beginning of “The Eagle Flies Alone” begins to play, a blue spotlight comes in at the same sequence and is shining at the curtain which gets the crowd riled up further. The cheers that The Phoenix Queen is receiving from the audience is outweighing anyone in the crowd that opposes her. The sound of the fog machines can be heard going off heavily as the stage soon fills with fog. The lights in the arena are coming back up creating a blue hue and just as the chorus kicks in, the crowd lets out a huge roar when they finally see Tara Fenix emerge from behind the curtain.

I, I go my own way!
I swim against the stream!
(Forever) I will fight the powers that be!

Tara is standing at the top of the stage wearing one of her designed jackets, and the hood pulled over her head. She is carrying a flagpole with a flag attached; she takes a moment to scan the crowd and see the number of her supporters and soon she raises the flag and waves it back and forth several times and the cameras do their own scan over the crowd and can see a number of people raising the same logo that is on the banner. The Age of the Phoenix. Tara continues to wave the banner for a few more seconds before holding it straight up and bringing the pole down to tap it against the stage and finally slings the pole over her shoulder while marching down to the ring. Some of the fans stretch their hands out for her, and she walks to one side with her arm held out slightly; however, her eyes remain locked on the ring. When she reaches the bottom of the ramp she goes to the nearby steel steps and quickly ascends. She stops for a moment and carefully attaches her own flagpole to the steel post where the Age of the Phoenix banner will be for the duration of the match.

I, I go my own way!
I swim against the stream!
(Forever) I will fight the pοwers that be!
The eagle flies alone!

After securing the flagpole to the ring pole, she takes two steps on the apron before sliding forward and down onto one knee; her head and eyes scan the crowd again while the crowd is chanting her name. She finally crawls between the middle and bottom ropes then charges to the far corner and as she lands on the second rope, she pulls her hood back and lets her arms go out with her palms up. She holds the pose for several seconds, then does a one-eighty off of the second rope to land back on her feet; she runs to the opposite end where the flagpole is, and repeats the process but this time holds the banner out for all to see the symbol. She does another one-eighty, lands inside the ring, and takes off her jacket while waiting for the match to begin.

TREY BOOKER: The Phoenix Queen has been on one helluva mean streak recently, while also making it clear she's aiming for the new Grand Champion, Emmanuelle. However, she's on a bit of a detour from that at the moment.

J.T. PRICE: Right now, the Clive Darling Cup Memorial winner is aiming to do what she does best- making quick work out of her enemies and then pursuing the gold!

Once the bell finally rings, Greyfield immediately rolls out and goes rummaging under the apron! Tara sits in her corner unamused before rolling out of the ring at her side as well, she quickly goes under the apron.

TREY BOOKER: Neither competitor is wasting any time!

After a few moments while the crowd's anticipation grows, Greyfield reemerges with a BLOODY CHAINSAW- Or rather, a plastic chainsaw prop more than likely bought from Party City! Wait- That's not all, he also pulls out FREDDY KRUEGER"S KNIFE GLOVES- ...Actually those are just fake too. The officer grins wickedly before rolling back in. Tara soon follows in with a TOMBSTONE?! Not only that, but she pulls out a hatchet and rolls back into the ring!

TREY BOOKER: Greyfeld's face just turned pale.

J.T. PRICE: Seems like her props have a little more… authenticity to them.

The Goddess grins as Greyfield looks at her weapons compared to his, taking a deep breath- He charges at her with the CHAINSAW- AND SHE BREAKS THE PLASTIC PROP WITH A HARD SWING OF THE HATCHET, SENDING GREYFIELD SCATTERING BACK! Greyfield quickly puts on his knife gloves and tries again- SHE SLAMS THE TOMBSTONE ACROSS HIS HEAD AND HE FALLS OVER ON HIS KNEES, OUT ON HIS FEET.

TREY BOOKER: JESUS CHRIST!

J.T. PRICE: WELL, THAT'S SOME REAL BRUTALITY FOR YOU! HE DOESN'T KNOW WHERE HE IS ANYMORE!

Fenix places the tombstone against his head, she then backs up against the ropes- tuning up the girl band as she stomps her feet, AND THRUSTS HER RIGHT LEG INTO THE TOMBSTONE! THE SOLE OF HER BOOT COMPLETELY DECIMATING IT AGAINST GREYFIELD"S HEAD! THE OFFICER COLLAPSES INTO A HEAP!

TREY BOOKER: GENOCIDE KICK! HE'S OUT! HE'S OUT COLD!

J.T. PRICE: WHAT A SUPERKICK! But, huh? She's not done!

Tara nonchalantly moves most of the debris away while pulling Greyfield up, wrapping his arm around his own neck with the Cobra Clutch! SHE THEN JUMPS UP AND WRAPS HER LEGS AROUND HIS HEAD WITH THE TRIANGLE HEADSCISSORS, SQUEEZING TIGHT WHILE APPLYING THE COBRA CLUTCH ARM CHOKE!

TREY BOOKER: He was already out cold! The Phoenix Triangle is unnecessary!

J.T. PRICE: It's not about necessity, it's about making a statement!

THE PHOENIX TRIANGLE IS LOCKED IN, GREYFIELD'S ALREADY LIMP BODY ISN'T MOVING AS THE REFEREE WITHOUT HESITATION CALLS THE MATCH!

DING! DING! DING!

HOLLY PEREZ: Here is your winner by submission…. TAAAAAARAAAAA FEEEEEEENIX!

Fenix continues to hold the submission for a few moments, Greyfield's head turning purple- But she finally relents! Standing up and dusting her shoulders off, the referee goes to raise her hand but she snatches it away from him, motioning a championship belt around her waist.

TREY BOOKER: Message sent and received clearly..

J.T. PRICE: Damn right!

After taking a moment to check on the fallen Officer Greyfield, special referee Rapture moves to Tara’s side. It’s hard to tell what he’s saying to her with the mask covering his face, but one can only assume she is the latest competitor to receive an invitation into the KaVengers. Then…surprising…Tara begins to nod her head in approval. You can almost feel the excitement pouring out of Rapture, when Fenix suddenly kicks his legs out from underneath him! She grabs one leg and begins to twist…Phoenix Lock #1 is applied and Rapture immediately begins to tap!

J.T. PRICE: Well, so much for that idea.

TREY BOOKER: I will say this about the KaVengers, they are persistent in their recruiting techniques.

Tara finally releases the hold and returns to her celebration, leaving both her opponent and the referee on the canvas.


Ratman and Serrano are seen backstage in the gorilla position with the rest of the KaVengers, who have had a somewhat unsuccessful night. The group all seem to be upset that their invitations to join the team weren’t met with the responses they had hoped for. As Rapture limps into the scene with the rest of the group, Percy does his best to cheer them up.

RATMAN: I know it’s been a rough night for all of us, but we gotta keep our chins up guys.

NOAH HOPE: Why should we? No one likes us!

RAPTURE: This whole idea was a waste of time…

RATMAN: Now now guys, don’t say that! How could we have known if we didn’t try?!

GUY: Some of us had to do more work than if we were just losing our usual matches you know.

EL PUMA: Me disculpo. No estoy seguro de lo que dices, pero no creo que hayamos tenido mucho éxito esta noche.

RATMAN: Exactly El Puma! At least you weren’t losing! You all got to be the stars I know you are, and not make others into stars at your own expense!

EL PUMA: ¿Qué?

RATMAN: Exactly Puma, we are okay!

Everyone’s heads hang, not able to believe what Percival is saying.

RATMAN: C’mon guys, me and Serrano could still win the tag team titles! So that’s something…

The group continues to mope as a few members even wave their hands dismissing Ratman and Serrano’s chances at winning. Ratman looks as if he is about to cry when Serrano looks around at the group and decides to step up and help his friend.

SERRANO POBLANO: HEY! Now is not the time for giving up! Sure, maybe we hit a few setbacks, but my friend here can be as hot as a habanero in that ring, even when all hope is lost, and you know what? I think it’s time we all tried just a little bit harder to do the same, don’t you? You may think that those Detroit Style Psychos have us beat, but it’s not over till it’s over! Now let’s shape up and win those tag team championships, alright?! I want every single one of you to be cheering us on! Not because we are a part of a stable, no, but because we are friends! That’s what this has always been about. Friends sticking up for each other when no one else will, and we will continue to do that. Now, don’t let this be the end. We are just getting started!

Everyone begins to look around and smile, getting behind Serrano as he tries to motivate the group. Even Larry looks up from his phone with a single tear in his eye.

LARRY KACHOW: Serrano, that was beautifu…

Just before Larry can finish, Serrano rips a massive wet fart, popping the boys.

LARRY KACHOW: Right…

Larry looks back down to his phone as the group laughs. Serrano turns to Ratman, who appears to be crying tears of joy now.

SERRANO POBLANO: You want to do the honors friend?

Ratman nods as he turns to the group.

RATMAN: KAVENGERS…

The group looks on as Ratman takes a small pause.

RATMAN: group hug!

The group cheers on and gathers into a massive group hug surrounding Larry. The group are last seen jumping for joy as we cut back to the show.



HOLLY PEREZ: The following contest is for the Project Honor Tag Team Championships! In this match it is tornado style rules and each partner must be shackled to each other.

A disorienting strobe light effect fills the arena as the cheerful melody of “Even Rats” begins to play over the sound system…

♫Even the rats know that trouble's gonna come
To the edge of the city, see the little guys run
I hear Spring's nice in Canada
Maybe the men up on Capitol Hill
Need a little less Jack and a little more Jill
You can have my stereo
Even though the race may never be won
I can lay like a dandy, get heavy in the sun
Take a love song and beautify
Whoa whoa whoa♫

Percival Burque and Serrano Poblano emerge from backstage, The Ratman spinning in circles with his arms outstretched to his sides as Serrano holds his hands behind his head and slowly gyrates his hips. When Percy finally stops spinning and Serrano stops thrusting, they face each other and perform a ‘Patty Cake’ routine along with the song’s rhythm.

♫I hear the words but the meaning gets lost
It’s a game, it depends on who the ball gets tossed
It's the same ball anyway
You're tuggin' me now, cut me loose or take me on
You can pray, you can play the piper all night long
That's some good home cooking
Even though the race may never be won
I can lay like a dandy, get heavy in the sun
Take a love song and beautify♫

With the lyrics of the song complete and nothing but the happy yet somewhat melancholy instrumental remaining, Percy once again starts to spin in circles on his way down the ramp, while Serrano follows closely behind, occasionally reaching out to make sure The Ratman doesn’t spin right off of the entrance ramp.

They finally reach the ring and roll under the bottom rope, at which point Percy continues to spin without a care in the world, while Serrano does his best ‘Cabbage Patch’ and ‘Lawnmower’ dance moves. At ringside, Larry Kachow and Papa Rasputin watch on with expressions of annoyed disbelief as Papercut hops from one of their shoulders to the other.

As the music begins to die down, Percy stops spinning and it’s clear that he’s unsteady on his feet. Fortunately, his spicy friend is there to keep him from falling over, and once they both have their footing, they perform a second ‘Patty Cake’ routine before giving each other a great big hug.

HOLLY PEREZ: Introducing first, the challengers, at a total combined weight of four hundred seventy-five pounds… Percival “Ratman” Burque and “The Sultan of Spice” Serrano Poblano...PEPPER JACK CHEESE!!!

The arena darkens with a single soft spotlight on the stage where smoke begins to cover the ground. After the initial guitar strum of his theme, a silhouette can be seen through the spotlight. The silhouette is slightly rocking with his gaze towards his shoulder. A slight gleam can be seen through the darkness. Slade walks into the spotlight with the championship draped over his shoulder. Slade, now taping his fits, begins staring intensely, yet void of emotion, at the ring. Slade finishes taping his fists then cracks his knuckles, then his neck. The champ pulls the strap off his shoulder and with one hand, drags the belt behind him as he begins his walk down to the entryway of the ring. No matter what the fans at ringside do, nothing breaks Slade's focus or gaze. Once getting to the ring, Slade stops and scans the ring before approaching the stairs in the corner. Slade climbs the stairs, the belt roughly scraping along the edges, and quickly enters the ring as “In Time” begins to pick up in pace.

HOLLY PEREZ: Introducing their opponents! First, from Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at two hundred and twenty pounds. He is one half of the reigning Tag Team Champions, this is Slade Castle!

The Slayer of the Street tosses his title to the corner as he begins to walk circles in the ring. He appears to get more and more pumped up before approaching the corner. Slade begins unleashing a flurry of punches on the turnbuckle pad until bellowing out finally showing any sign of emotion. Anger. As the music fades away and the lights come up, Slade's punches begin to lose steam. Slowly as he regains his focus, he now begins directing his gaze to his competitor(s) and awaits the bell.

♫ Alright ♫

♫ I'm laying in bed
With a lit cigarette
Can't say if last night
Was a blonde or brunette
Megan Fox is on the phone
Keeps blowing me up
And there's three shots of whiskey
In my coffee cup ♫

♫ I'm a bad mutha fucka, heeh
I'm a bad mutha fucka ♫

♫ I can polish off a bottle
In the blink of an eye
I can drink all night
And not pay a dime
Just as soon kick your ass
As I take a piss
Even fuckin' Chuck Norris
Don't want none of this ♫

♫ I'm a bad mutha fucka (Hehe) ♫

As his entrance music continues to play, a spotlight shines through the dimmed purple lighting to rest upon the entrance stage, where Julius Foulweather stands with both arms crossed in front of his chest, a look of total determination on his face. Wearing a black suit, complete with tie and jacket, Julius slowly lowers his arms and begins to walk forward, his nearly opaque eyes set upon the ring. He occasionally stops to give a fan a cold glare when they manage to grab his attention. It is a bug-eyed look from a man that simply does not give a fuck, and fearing the possibility of being knocked out, the fan backs down.

♫ I can pick up any chick
That I meet at the bar
I can even take the one
Right off of your arm
I got a woman at home
And a kid on the way
I got a girl in New York
And four more in L.A. ♫

♫ I'm a bad mutha fucka
(Mutha fucka, hehehe)
I'm a bad mutha fucka (Hehe)
(Hahaha) ♫

♫ I got hookers by the handfuls
Five at a time
But they're the ones paying me
By the end of the night
Pimps hunt me down
And tryin' get the cash
Then me and Samuel Jackson
Bust a cap in their ass ♫

♫ We're bad mutha fuckas (Hæh!)
Bad mutha fuckas, come on
(Hahaha) ♫

HOLLY PEREZ: And his tag team partner. From The darkness that resides in the hearts of all men. He weighs in at two hundred and forty five pounds, he is the other half of the reigning Tag Team Champions. He is The “Ferocious” Julius Foulweather!"

After stepping between the ropes, Julius is followed to the center of the ring by a single spotlight. A grin forms on his face, showing off the pointed teeth that hide behind his lips. As he stares forward at the hard camera, Julius slides out of his suit jacket and folds it neatly over his arm. After handing the jacket over to a ringside attendant, he adjusts the black leather gloves covering his hands, content to wrestle in what remains of his formal attire.

♫ I'm a bad mutha fucka (Hehe)
Write bad checks
To the I.R.S.
I'm a master at passing
Sobriety test
I sell dope to the Hot Topic
Kids at the mall
I'm like O.J. baby
I get away with it all ♫

♫ I'm a bad mutha fucka (Hehehe)
And he's in jail mutha fucka, come on ♫

♫ I got a room in my house
For my ten foot bong
I'm pretty sure George Thorogood
Even wrote me a song
I'm a bad, bad, bad
To the bone, mutha fucka ♫

♫ Bad to the bone
(Bad mutha fucka!) ♫

DING! DING! DING!

Foulweather and Castle hand their tag titles over to the referee who raises them up in their air before handing them to an official outside the ring. Then he is handed two pairs of shackles. He places them on both teams before ringing the bell. Arms only spread a certain amount of feet apart, but that doesn't stop the four from charging at each other. Julius and Poblano start kicking at each other while Slade is using the chain to choke Percival out. Poblano uses his leg to push Foulweather off him. He double axes the back of Castle's back which lets Ratman escape.

Ratman runs closer to Poblano and then dropkicks Julius, sending him over the top rope, forcing Slade to go backwards, but Poblano grabs the legs of Slade to stop him from going over too and his arms are pulled back because of Julius going over. A smirk comes on the face of Ratman who then starts kicking his leg then his midsection. He sledgehammers Slade's gut as Julius starts to stir. Julius pulls himself to the rope and grabs the leg of Poblano and pulls him back before he starts digging into his eyes. Ratman goes and grabs Julius by the hair and pulls him up to a standing position, but Slade clubbers Ratman from behind. This gives Julius enough time to climb the top rope and jump off onto Percival, but this also brings Castle down by force of the chain being pulled.

Julius and Slade pull themselves up as they use their chains to choke their opponents. Pepper Jack Cheese struggle to breathe, but Poblano reaches into his pocket and tosses salt into Castle's eyes, and Percival grabs Papercut from his pocket and the rat starts climbing up onto Julius, causing Julius to freak out.

FOULWEATHER: OH MOTHER FORNICATOR!!!

Papercut jumps off of Julius, but this allows Pepper Jack Cheese to get up. Both teams charge and clobber each other on the skulls with their cuffs and all four go down. As both teams begin to stir, we see Noah Hope and Guy emerge from the backstage area to watch and cheer on their friends from the entrance ramp. They successfully get the crowd behind Percival and Serrano, and as all four men get back up, the sudden support motivates them to strike first. Serrano connects with a combination of shuffling jabs on Foulweather while Percy lands a few kicks on Castle, ultimately stunning him with a superkick out of nowhere! Both True Society members go down, giving Percival and Poblano the chance to go for simultaneous pin attempts…

ONE!

TWO!

DOUBLE KICK OUT!!

TREY BOOKER: If there’s one thing Percival and Serrano have going for them, it’s their tag team cohesion!

J.T. PRICE: …and naturally foul odors….

Ratman starts to pull Castle back up, but the Slayer of the Street responds with a sudden low blow! Serrano turns toward his friend, but this only leaves him wide open for Julius’ Miss Peregrine’s Hold for Peculiar Opponents! Poblano is locked into the rear naked choke, and to keep Burque from aiding his partner, Slade kneels over him to deliver a series of mounted punches. Sensing the end, the referee goes in to check on Poblano, who seems to be fading fast.

At that moment, Rapture and El Puma walk onto the stage to join Noah and Guy. Together, the four men fire up the crowd again, creating the first chant of “LET’S GO SERRANO” in the history of Project: Honor. Amazingly, the tactic seems to work as Poblano starts to pump his chubby arm in the air, fighting the effects of Foulweather’s rear naked choke with sheer willpower alone. As The Sultan of Spice fights back to his feet, Percival flips Slade off of him with a modified monkey flip. Castle’s momentum forces Julius to lose balance, and his submission hold is broken!

Suddenly, Ratman kips up into the air, hooks Julius’ head with his arm, and drops him with a hard DDT! Castle gets back up and charges at Percy, but Serrano cuts him off with a running butt bump to the chest! The members of Pepper Jack Cheese then hit the ropes, and just as Julius and Slade make it to their feet, they clothesline both men with the strap that connects them by the wrists!

TREY BOOKER: The champs are down again!

J.T. PRICE: And those two idiots are climbing the same turn buckle!

Once Percival and Serrano reach the top rope, they leap off in tandem, with Serrano coming down on top of Slade and Percival landing on top of Julius…Ratatouille connects and they stay seated on their opponents for the pin attempt!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE…NO!

Both Slade and Julius roll their shoulders off the mat, but this doesn’t seem to deter Percy or Serrano at all. They pull their opponents up and hook them for a pair of suplexes, immediately dropping the Motor City Psychos back to the mat! Percy and Serrano then face each other and begin to perform an elaborate patty-cake routine. They finish this by clasping hands and dropping a pair of elbows on the champs. Another pin attempt…

ONE!

TWO!

THREE…KICK OUTS!

Still not giving up, Serrano starts to pull Slade to his feet, but Castle grabs Poblano’s head and drops back to his knees with a jawbreaker. Percy pulls Julius up, but quickly loses focus when he sees his partner in trouble. Taking advantage of the moment, Julius springs into the air to hit his Spiral Kick! Both members of Pepper Jack Cheese are stunned against the ropes, which gives the champs the chance to hit them with a pair of clotheslines to knock them over the top and to the floor!

Julius then takes a few steps back and suddenly charges forward for a suicide dive, but with Slade unaware of what his partner is doing, the binding of their wrists botches the move completely with Julius awkwardly landing on the floor and Slade getting clotheslined by the top rope. All four men are down…when one final member of the KaVengers emerges on the stage. Larry takes a brief moment from looking at his phone to clap his hands…then again…and again…encouraging the crowd to pump up Percival and Serrano with a golf clap that slowly increases in volume and intensity!

Percival and Serrano get on their feet and then pick up Julius, throwing him back between the ropes. They then re-enter the ring and Percival slaps both of his hands against Serrano’s shoulders. He starts to quiver…then tremble…and finally his whole body is vibrating like a cat in a washing machine…

TREY BOOKER: Oh…my…god. Is he…?

J.T. PRICE: Yep. He’s bulking up, Trey.

Finally, Serrano lets out a primal roar and then pulls Castle off the mat, lifting him onto his shoulders. He stays close enough to the turnbuckles for Percy to make his way to the top, but before Ratman can leap off with Oh Rats, Julius springs off the middle turnbuckle, lands on Slade’s back, and climbs onto his shoulders. Serrano strains under the weight but manages to stay on his feet with both Slade and Julius seated above him. Unsure of what to do, Percival finally leaps off the top, landing in a seated position on top of Julius’ shoulders…all four men stacked up like a human totem pole…

RATMAN: Oh…too high…this is too high!!! Papa!!!

TREY BOOKER: That is the most awkward and impressive Tower of Doom I’ve ever witnessed…

J.T. PRICE: Maybe…the power of friendship is real?

With Serrano’s legs shaking tremendously, Percy spins on Julius’ shoulders and flips him off of Castle with a huge hurricanrana!!! Julius hits the mat hard but Percival hooks his legs in a roll up, just as Slade Castle rolls forward with Serrano along for the ride…

ONE!


TWO!!



THREE!!!



DING! DING! DING!

HOLLY PEREZ: Your winners of the match…and NNNNEEEEWWWWWW PROJECT: HONOR TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS…PERCIVAL BURQUE…SERRANO POBLANO…PEPPER JACK CHEESE!!!

The rest of the KaVengers waste no time in charing toward the ring, overcome with pure joy. Percival and Serrano both roll off the mat to their knees, looking at each other with their mouths hanging wide open. Tears begin to well up in the eyes of both men when they suddenly reach out to embrace each other in the most powerful hug in history! Noah Hope, Guy, Rapture, El Puma, and Larry KaChow enter the ring and pull their friends off the mat, lifting them high onto their shoulders.

Confetti and balloons fall from the rafters above, showering the KaVengers in a storm of celebratory happiness. Sometimes the good guys win and all's right with the world.











Yet as they continue to celebrate, the camera gets a shot of the referee as he frantically speaks with Holly Perez, who may have simply jumped the gun…

HOLLY PEREZ: Ladies and gentlemen, I have just been informed by the official that Serrano Poblano’s shoulders were down in Slade Castle’s victory roll at the same time Julius’ was being pinned by Percival Burque. Due to this double pin, this match is a draw!

The celebration in the ring slowly begins to wind down, as The KaVengers look on and wonder what this might mean. At ringside, Julius and Slade rip their championships away from the referee…

HOLLY PEREZ: And STILL YOUR PROJECT: HONOR TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS…JULIUS FOULWEATHER…SLADE CASTLE…THE MOTOR CITY PSYCHOS!!!

We can clearly see the faces of Serrano and Percival sink as they are slowly lowered back to their feet, their heads covered in multi-colored confetti. Shooting an occasional glare at each other, Julius and Slade make their way back up the ramp before stopping to raise their championships in unison, much to the dismay of the crowd and the KaVengers.

TREY BOOKER: Ladies and gentlemen, this is just a travesty. They showed such heart, such teamwork, but in the end it just wasn’t meant to be.

J.T. PRICE: Thank god.


Before the logo flashes on the screen to indicate the end of the show, a familiar voice is heard through the entire arena.

“If you see these dogs in the front yard, just know upstairs I’m going hard.”

“BING BONG!”

The opening beat to "oops!!!" by Yung Gravy w/ Lil Wayne graces the ears of everyone in the audience. Peach and pink strobe lights start going off. Every woman in attendance suddenly feels moist as the lyrics start and Lil Petey steps out onto the stage. Fur coat, multi-colored button up that's only halfway buttoned up, and black pants make up his attire. Hannah Morrison accompanies him from behind, which is the opposite of what usually happens. Petey's got a microphone in hand and starts to rap with the lyrics.

♫Ayy, supercalifragilisticexpialiexpiali-dope shit
Supercalifragilic-, my ex be on some ho shit
Superman, I get dem bands but ain't gon' buy you roses
Super-duper get them cougars, took my wrist and froze it
Super-duper hoes
Y'all got Oompa Loompa hoes
I ain't never knew ya hoes
Prolly still ran through 'em, though♫

The fans in attendance are marking out to the long-awaited appearance of Lil Petey. All the dudes Hannah passes enter simp mode because of how gorgeous she is while all the women are trying to reach out and touch Petey’s chest.

♫Oh, wait, wait, I do know your hoe?
You talkin' 'bout, you talkin' 'bout Tracy?
Nah, nah, nah, nah, you mean like, like, Tracy with the ass?
Tracy with the, with the Honda?
Shit, well♫

Petey and Hannah approach the ring and he holds onto her hand as she climbs up the steps and to the middle of the apron. She spreads her legs and Petey slides right under her into the ring. Hannah then climbs in-between the ropes and into the ring with the Big Booty Bandit. Petey jumps onto the turnbuckle and pulls his coat apart so that the moistness level in the arena rises to a level that is probably unsafe. Hannah stands around to make sure no women are trying to make a move.

♫Oops, baby
Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy
Never knew that was your boo, baby
Hit her five times in the coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie dai-, yeah
Oops, baby
Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy
I just tried to hit, it's my duty, baby
Sippin' on the Goose, like Boosie, baby♫

Both Petey and Hannah stand in the middle of the ring. Hannah is handed a mic from ringside while Petey holds onto the same one he was just rapping into. “oops!!!” fades out so that all can be heard are the extremely loud roars of cheers from the fans - almost to the point that the arena is shaking. Petey eggs them on by fist pumping to the chants and Hannah just enjoys how much fun Petey is having currently.

LIL PETEY: YEAH BABY! GIVE ME MORE!

The wet-o-meter maxes out and the chants continue while Petey grabs a hold of Hannah and both begin to fist pump.

CROWD: PETEY! PETEY! PETEY! PETEY!

One really loud fan near the barricade screams at the top of her lungs, ‘SUP BABY, TAKE ME OUT TO DINNER!’. Petey instantaneously hears and points over at her. That fan proceeds to faint and Hannah just chuckles.

LIL PETEY: YO, I absolutely missed this shit. I been gone too long and I know y’all missed me. I ain’t ever heard someone get this loud since last-

Hannah punches him in the arm and stops him from finishing his sentence.

LIL PETEY: Ayo, let me hear it for my girl Hannah real quick. Look at this fine masterpiece!

The crowd erupts into cheers again, Hannah turns red and then Petey signals for them to quiet down.

LIL PETEY: I just wanna start out by saying, if you’ve seen me at all in the past couple months, I don’t know who that was because it wasn’t me. I have no idea what’s even going on right now besides what I’ve been doing outside of wrestling, which I’m sure at some point you’ll be filled in on - kinda like Hannah-

Hannah punches him in the arm yet again.

LIL PETEY: Okay okay, sorry love. Iight, so catch this. Y’all know all about the Big Drip Productions growth and what we were doing with that, but ever since we got squid boy and tentacle man on board, I haven’t really been around much. To be quite honest, I don’t even remember who all is in Big Drip anymore, ya feel me?

CROWD: BIG DRIP! BIG DRIP! BIG DRIP!

Hannah leans over and whispers in his ear and Petey is taken aback.

LIL PETEY: HOLD UP WHAT??

Silence strikes the arena as Hannah continues whispering to him.

LIL PETEY: First off, that was hot. SHEEEEESH! Second, I heard my EX-bestie just confirmed that she is joining True Society last night. Which means that she’s no longer in Big Drip. I have revoked her bestie card and can’t wait to see the downfall of her and baldie since she decided to leave Jason. Craziness man. Absolute craziness. Moving along though…

Hannah grabs Petey’s arm because she knows what he’s about to talk about.

LIL PETEY: As you all know, I ain’t been around that much and the past couple times I have, didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to. I’ve been so distracted by life outside of wrestling; music, my boo thang, and other stuff. That’s actually why I’m here tonight, to announce something I’ve been thinking about for some time now.

He pauses to build suspense and you could see people just getting closer to the edge of their seats in anticipation.

LIL PETEY: Hannah and I made great-

Yet again, another punch from Hannah right to his arm. Same spot and everything, actually.

LIL PETEY: Okay okay. I am officially announcing my retirement…

Petey pauses again after hearing gasps from the crowd.

LIL PETEY: RETIREMENT TOUR!

CROWD: YES! YES! YES!

LIL PETEY: That’s right! Yes, I am retiring soon, but I want to go out the way only I could… WITH A BANG! Starting next Proving Ground, I will start a two month or less tour where I face people that I want and on my terms, ending with a very special match that I will save for later. I won’t announce too much right now to keep you all guessing, but I will say that next Proving Ground… I WILL BE JOINING MY BIG DRIP COUNTERPARTS; Hip Beast, Tentacle Man, Squid Boy and MEOWjin to face the KaVengers! It’s going to be match of the century, that’s for sure! Doesn’t get much better than this!

Cheers continue throughout the arena as Petey looks to close up the segment and get back to amazing love making with Hannah.

LIL PETEY: So yeah, the Lil Petey Retirement Tour starts next show with the match of the century. I’m out for now, bitches!

“oops!!!” starts playing again while Hannah and Petey leave the ring and exit the arena.

The Proving Ground and Project: Honor Logos flashes on the screen before fading completely to black.