Post by Lil Petey on Nov 24, 2021 22:30:08 GMT -5
“PETEY AND HANNAH GO TO PARIS PART TWO”
w/ HANNAH MORRISON
also w/ COLE MADDEN as the narrator & cameraman as usual
SEPTEMBER 20TH, 2021
PARIS, FRANCE
[on camera]
“PETEY PREPARES FOR BLACK FRIDAY SHOPPING”
BLACK FRIDAY MALL MAYHEM MATCH
vs. A SHIT TON OF PEOPLE
NOVEMBER 21ST, 2021
THE HIP HOUSE
[on camera]
w/ HANNAH MORRISON
also w/ COLE MADDEN as the narrator & cameraman as usual
SEPTEMBER 20TH, 2021
PARIS, FRANCE
[on camera]
The sun is shining, birds are chirping and whatever other romantic shit you can think of. It’s all happening right now and I’ve never seen anything like it. I almost wanted to puke, but that’s my brother finally living that fairy tale he had always made fun of. It was almost just that with how majestic Hannah looked. Her multi-colored hair flowing in the wind and Petey just staring at her, drool coming from his mouth. I’m just the narrator by the way, don’t mistake it for me simpin’ over Hannah. I got my boo, just focus on the boy and his lady.
“What’s next, sweet thing?” Hannah had the biggest smile on her face. She couldn’t remember the last time she had done anything like this and she made it known that this was her first time in Paris, too.
Petey caressed her hand with his and looked up at the sky, then back down into Hannah’s eyes. “Let’s go! We gonna be late, my lovely merwoman.”
The two started running and of course I had to run to keep up with them. I really shouldn’t have missed cardio day, but to be fair, I didn’t think Petey would ever just voluntarily run. I knew exactly where we were going and I feel like I was supposed to do something, but I can’t remember now.
Petey turns around and looks at me, making the same stupid face he always does when he wants me to do something. This time it was more sassy since he wasn’t trying to give away our next location, but still needed me to perform the task. It was as simple as calling the uber or whatever the fuck they call them here. I pull out my phone and then realized I already called it when it showed up next to us.
“Hurry it up, there’s no time to waste!” The foreign uber driver understood the assignment and took us off to the next location.
I continued to scroll through my phone to make sure the rest of the plans were intact and we were all gucci, as Petey likes to say. Of course they were because I made sure of it. We got food waiting and oh shit- I’m already saying too much.
“Are you hungry yet?” Petey looked at Hannah who was currently gazing out the window until he asked the question.
“I am, actually. Are we getting food?”
“We are, but probably not what you think.” Petey smirked at her. Then Hannah just stared at him, admiring the work she had done to him in such a short amount of time.
Petey had been known for his stupidity and antics and since he and Hannah met - at least while he’s around her - he’s been more calm and… well… normal. I’d like to think it was Petey all on his own, but we all know better than that. Hannah is changing Petey, but for the better. Not like one of those hoes that just tries to nitpick things about you. Nah, Hannah accepts Petey for who he is, but those little differences make a world of a difference.
Some time passes with us in the car just admiring the views. We start to slow down all the way to a complete stop.
“Here we are. Enjoy!” The fancy uber driver dropped us off and we continued to walk to the actual destination. All you could see around us is green, trees, and a bunch of flowers that make up the gardens.
Petey points up at the massive mansion in the distance. “That’s the Luxembourg Palace and these are the gardens. We’ll go on a tour of the Palace soon, babe, but for now, let’s go over here, lay back and enjoy some dope ass finger foods.”
“This is amazing! I’m so happy to be here with you.” I acted like there was something in my throat and fake coughed to catch Hannah’s attention since she was forgetting about someone special. “I didn’t forget about you, Cole. Did you help Petey at all with this trip?”
Well shit, now I’m in a predicament. Of course I had to help the dude, but only getting things set up. He actually planned things out, but I want him to have full credit. “Nope, it was all this big drippy boy here, surprisingly.”
“Surprisingly? Dammit Cole, why you gotta do me like that?” Hannah started giggling immediately and I just shrugged my shoulders at him. I’m his brother, it’s my job to pick on him.
That was really it for us talking for a bit. We found a quiet spot near the Palace and away from most people. Our area was all laid out already. You know I had to call in a favor from The Sultan of Spice and get the spicy spread. Hannah was the first to dig in and Petey didn’t waste any time following suit. A note was left with the food and Petey grabbed a hold of it to read it out loud.
“Hope you two enjoy these spicy meatballs with my special sauce. And remember, if you can’t handle the heat, you didn’t take enough clothes off beforehand. Stay spicy, friends.”
After laughing at the note and appreciating Serrano’s sense of humor, we dug into the food and just took in the vibes all around us.
TO BE CONTINUED...
TO BE CONTINUED...
“PETEY PREPARES FOR BLACK FRIDAY SHOPPING”
BLACK FRIDAY MALL MAYHEM MATCH
vs. A SHIT TON OF PEOPLE
NOVEMBER 21ST, 2021
THE HIP HOUSE
[on camera]
Things were a lot different in The Hip House as of recently. Sauce was almost always locked in his room, Petey was almost never home or always had Hannah with him and TJ has been up to no good or only good, you can never really tell with him. The house was pretty quiet for the most part, except for one specific part which just so happened to be coming from Petey’s room.
‘Drip on My Dresser’ by Lil Petey featuring Master Blaster was playing pretty loudly while Petey was in his closest rummaging through his clothes.
“Damn, I really forgot I had this shit in here. I got more drip than I thought, SHEEEEEEEESH!”
Petey turned to see that I had the camera on him and almost got offended, which is a shock to me.
“Woah dawg you just filming me all willy nilly now? You ain’t even gonna warn me? What we got coming up anyways? That Mall Mayhem thing? All I gotta say is there’s too many people in that match for me to give a fuck about and give them the clout they don’t deserve. There’s only a few Big Drippers that are gonna be at the mall and hopefully TJ and I can get through to some of ‘em. We got a bigger picture type of scheme going on and I can’t just be giving that away because I know this video is gonna end up in the hands of someone who will fuck up the translation or whatever. You know how that ‘he said she said’ shit goes.”
After finishing what he was saying, Petey threw his arms up in the air and walked over to the section of his closest labeled ‘GUCCI’.
“I really need to fill this shit up, man. I don’t know where all my Gucci shit went, but I know that Mall of America got a store in it. I’m ‘bout to hit a lick on ‘em as long as they keep that good good in there.”
When Petey turned to the right a little bit, he found what looked to be a door of some kind and then turned to look at me.
“Yo, what is this?? WE ABOUT TO GO TO NARNIA OR SOMETHIN’?”
Before he could charge ahead, I pulled on his shoulder to get a little more out of him since he really hasn’t said much about the upcoming match and you know how management can be about keeping the balance and whatever else they always carry on about.
“Yeah I mean there’s some big names in here like Ozymandias, Syndicate, Jason Long, Havoc, Arata Asakura, Emmanuelle, that pimpin’ mother fucker Julius, MEOWJIN, Swindle and all those other hoes in this match. But honestly man, as long as I don’t die, that’s an accomplishment for me. I already got the Tag Team Championships with my mother fucking dawg, I’m gucci for now. Maybe I’ll get with Teej and we’ll do some recruiting. I have my eyes on a few people and I’m pretty sure they’ll be down to do business. I might get tossed into a wall or two, but it’d be worth it!”
Petey looks back at me with a sassy look.
“Can we go now?? I wanna see what’s inside, fam!”
Of course I nod at him and let him go first, because this is about to be the funniest shit you ever see. Petey starts to channel his inner Archimedes J. Manson and then lets out a massive shout.
“FOR NARNIAAAAAA!”
Petey then charges at the wall and slams so fucking hard it ends up knocking himself out. I drew that door on the wall knowing this mother fucker was going to be so damn high he couldn’t tell the difference. Petey’s knocked out now and I can’t stop laughing. Until next time, you’ve witnessed another Lil Petey shenanigan, even though it’s probably not as long as you wanted. Shouldn’t be a disappointment at this point, knowing how small Petey is and all that.
