Post by Noah Hope on Sept 9, 2021 8:41:06 GMT -5
In some sort of giant home. Noah Hope sits on a couch with a PS2 controller in hand, still playing "Scarface: The World Is Yours". Noah’s best friend and fellow professional wrestler, Archie Butt walks in, Noah sharply turns at him in complete shock.
"You die, motherfu… oh, it's just you, take a seat butt face."
Archie walks over and takes a seat next to Noah, he props his leg up onto the coffee table, to which Noah frowns upon.
"Hey, get your stinky plates of meat off my table, I paid a fucking fortune for that fucker. It's from the Cayman Islands and it's worth more than your head."
"What's gotten into you lately? You've gone all loco on me."
Noah overreacts in an act of coked-up "blind rage", imitating the game.
"You think I'm loco?! You think I'm LOCO?! I'm Noah Hopetana! I'm da BOMB guy! And I! I! … I seriously gotta take a shit."
Noah’s blind rage has ended and Noah makes his way from the couch to the bathroom. Archie sits up, but then hears a rumble from his own stomach, he quickly grabs it with both hands.
"Oh crappy mcdouble crappy… We shouldn't have had that quart of milk… it's not sitting well with the fish taco."
Archie gets up from the couch and waddles towards the bathroom, which is obviously occupied by Noah, Archie rattles the doorknob and bangs his fist on the door.
"Noah, open the effing door before I shit on the carpet!"
From through the door, Noah Hope replies.
"Man, can't you see I'm takin' a shit? This puree poo is never ending... Use the upstairs bathroom."
"Errr… okay..."
Archie Butt bolts for the elegant staircase and makes it to the bathroom in time. Shortly after, they both return to the couch for more Scarface. Both sit down gingerly muttering about ring sting.”
"You got a look in your eye like you haven't won a match in a year."
"Can't you see what we're becoming, Noah? We're losers. We're not winners, we're losers. WE ARE FUDGING JOBBERS!!"
"Go home, you stoned."
"I'm not stoned, you're stoned."
Neither of them are stoned, but both kinda lazy. The conversation becomes more and more random from there.
"I kill a fecker for fun but for a green card, I’d carve someone up real nice."
"…but Noah, you are American and Canadian."
"And?"
“You have dual citizenship… Why do you have a house in the United States if you dis.."
"'Cause this is the land of opportunity, dipshit, and no one can take that away from me. 'cause me… I want what's coming to me."
"Or is it a case of you have no fucking idea what you are talking about and you live here because your Dad paid for it?"
"Dude…. That’s my thunder right there…. You stole it… bastard....”
“I’m bored…”
“Same...!”
“How did the scene go earlier? Promo was scheduled for earlier… right?”
“FUCK… SHIT… DAMN… CRAP… BALLS… I FORGOT THAT WAS TODAY!!!”
Noah literally in a blind panic launches himself over the back of the sofa, charging for the door… a door he smashes into head first knocking himself on his ass, he slides a little. From the floor, on his ass in a dazed state… he turns slowly to Archie who is borderline pissing himself.
“Get over here and help me up pritt-stic… I’ll tell them how great I am another time…"
Archie gets up and offers a hand.
“I THINK I GOT CARPET BURN ON MY ASSHOLE DUDE!!!”
"You die, motherfu… oh, it's just you, take a seat butt face."
Archie walks over and takes a seat next to Noah, he props his leg up onto the coffee table, to which Noah frowns upon.
"Hey, get your stinky plates of meat off my table, I paid a fucking fortune for that fucker. It's from the Cayman Islands and it's worth more than your head."
"What's gotten into you lately? You've gone all loco on me."
Noah overreacts in an act of coked-up "blind rage", imitating the game.
"You think I'm loco?! You think I'm LOCO?! I'm Noah Hopetana! I'm da BOMB guy! And I! I! … I seriously gotta take a shit."
Noah’s blind rage has ended and Noah makes his way from the couch to the bathroom. Archie sits up, but then hears a rumble from his own stomach, he quickly grabs it with both hands.
"Oh crappy mcdouble crappy… We shouldn't have had that quart of milk… it's not sitting well with the fish taco."
Archie gets up from the couch and waddles towards the bathroom, which is obviously occupied by Noah, Archie rattles the doorknob and bangs his fist on the door.
"Noah, open the effing door before I shit on the carpet!"
From through the door, Noah Hope replies.
"Man, can't you see I'm takin' a shit? This puree poo is never ending... Use the upstairs bathroom."
"Errr… okay..."
Archie Butt bolts for the elegant staircase and makes it to the bathroom in time. Shortly after, they both return to the couch for more Scarface. Both sit down gingerly muttering about ring sting.”
"You got a look in your eye like you haven't won a match in a year."
"Can't you see what we're becoming, Noah? We're losers. We're not winners, we're losers. WE ARE FUDGING JOBBERS!!"
"Go home, you stoned."
"I'm not stoned, you're stoned."
Neither of them are stoned, but both kinda lazy. The conversation becomes more and more random from there.
"I kill a fecker for fun but for a green card, I’d carve someone up real nice."
"…but Noah, you are American and Canadian."
"And?"
“You have dual citizenship… Why do you have a house in the United States if you dis.."
"'Cause this is the land of opportunity, dipshit, and no one can take that away from me. 'cause me… I want what's coming to me."
"Or is it a case of you have no fucking idea what you are talking about and you live here because your Dad paid for it?"
"Dude…. That’s my thunder right there…. You stole it… bastard....”
“I’m bored…”
“Same...!”
“How did the scene go earlier? Promo was scheduled for earlier… right?”
“FUCK… SHIT… DAMN… CRAP… BALLS… I FORGOT THAT WAS TODAY!!!”
Noah literally in a blind panic launches himself over the back of the sofa, charging for the door… a door he smashes into head first knocking himself on his ass, he slides a little. From the floor, on his ass in a dazed state… he turns slowly to Archie who is borderline pissing himself.
“Get over here and help me up pritt-stic… I’ll tell them how great I am another time…"
Archie gets up and offers a hand.
“I THINK I GOT CARPET BURN ON MY ASSHOLE DUDE!!!”