Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2021 13:07:00 GMT -5
The scene opens up as we see Earl Boyde in his house, beer can in hand and everything, but instead of wearing his traditional “FAT, DRUNK AND PISSED OFF” shirt, he was instead wearing… the same shirt, but the text was in Japanese instead, making it say “脂肪、酔っぱらい、腹を立てて “. Earl would begin to speak.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, can’t believe I’m going to Japan, boy. Can’t wait to try out the food at the airport, can’t wait to use one of them samurai swords and hell, I might get drunk at the bar If I have time.
Earl Boyde took a sip out the beer can before speaking again.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, let's get to the match itself, I will be teaming up with The Hoeski, Latoya Hixx. Now, I must say The Hellacious Heartbreaker is a damn cool nickname but damn is Hick stupid as a bag of horse shit. Now, I’m not the smartest guy myself given I failed High School, twice for a matter of fact. But even I would know not to name myself The Hoeski. She says she serves as a role-model but if she’s going around calling herself that, then the ladies of the future are fucked.
Earl would take another sip of the beer can before speaking again.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, now the opponents aren’t much better, first we have the team of Yelich and Shepherd. Now, Yelich over here claims he is undefeated, now I can respect that, but I can’t respect the fact that he says everybody smells like shit. Now, If you want to smell shit then go to the Taco Bell restroom, then you will be smelling shit, boy. But for now, you will be the one that will smell stinky as I will beat you so bad, that you will need a diaper change like the little baby you are.
Earl Boyde would yawn before talking.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, now we have Artemis Shepherd, dear lord that’s a mouth full. Anyways, Shepherd sees himself as a ruler, a king. Hey boy, no offense but this ain’t the eighteen hundreds anymore boy, people like you get taken you early in the barrooms, because all they do is flap their damn jaw and don’t have the brawn to make the plan work. Sorry pretty boy but that’s how the fighting world works. If you lack any brawn, then you are gonna get beaten up and bruised.
Earl Boyde would walk over to the fridge and grab a new can of beer before speaking again
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, now the other team we have are these two goofy bunch of bitches that call themselves The Massacre. From my years in the bar, some people wear masks, some paint their faces, some drench themselves in blood. But to me, you are just another person in line to receive punishment. I don't care how scary you wanna make yourselves, I will stand my ground and It will be all red and blood for you!
Earl Boyde would try to take another sip of beer but then some hillbilly with a sledgehammer would jump out of Earl’s window.
HILLBILLY
EARL, I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT MY KIDS!
The hillbilly would try to charge at Earl but he would slip and fall. Earl would pick him up and toss him out of his window. Earl would take a look at the window
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, I’m gonna need to pay to fix that…
The screen fades to black.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, can’t believe I’m going to Japan, boy. Can’t wait to try out the food at the airport, can’t wait to use one of them samurai swords and hell, I might get drunk at the bar If I have time.
Earl Boyde took a sip out the beer can before speaking again.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, let's get to the match itself, I will be teaming up with The Hoeski, Latoya Hixx. Now, I must say The Hellacious Heartbreaker is a damn cool nickname but damn is Hick stupid as a bag of horse shit. Now, I’m not the smartest guy myself given I failed High School, twice for a matter of fact. But even I would know not to name myself The Hoeski. She says she serves as a role-model but if she’s going around calling herself that, then the ladies of the future are fucked.
Earl would take another sip of the beer can before speaking again.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, now the opponents aren’t much better, first we have the team of Yelich and Shepherd. Now, Yelich over here claims he is undefeated, now I can respect that, but I can’t respect the fact that he says everybody smells like shit. Now, If you want to smell shit then go to the Taco Bell restroom, then you will be smelling shit, boy. But for now, you will be the one that will smell stinky as I will beat you so bad, that you will need a diaper change like the little baby you are.
Earl Boyde would yawn before talking.
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, now we have Artemis Shepherd, dear lord that’s a mouth full. Anyways, Shepherd sees himself as a ruler, a king. Hey boy, no offense but this ain’t the eighteen hundreds anymore boy, people like you get taken you early in the barrooms, because all they do is flap their damn jaw and don’t have the brawn to make the plan work. Sorry pretty boy but that’s how the fighting world works. If you lack any brawn, then you are gonna get beaten up and bruised.
Earl Boyde would walk over to the fridge and grab a new can of beer before speaking again
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, now the other team we have are these two goofy bunch of bitches that call themselves The Massacre. From my years in the bar, some people wear masks, some paint their faces, some drench themselves in blood. But to me, you are just another person in line to receive punishment. I don't care how scary you wanna make yourselves, I will stand my ground and It will be all red and blood for you!
Earl Boyde would try to take another sip of beer but then some hillbilly with a sledgehammer would jump out of Earl’s window.
HILLBILLY
EARL, I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT MY KIDS!
The hillbilly would try to charge at Earl but he would slip and fall. Earl would pick him up and toss him out of his window. Earl would take a look at the window
EARL BOYDE
Hey boy, I’m gonna need to pay to fix that…
The screen fades to black.