Post by pandalike on Jun 29, 2021 10:57:06 GMT -5
Ten years ago
I made a promise.
A promise to Martin.
To be someone who he could be proud of.
I was a young wrestler joining the federation when I first met Martin. I was cocky and full of pride. I came straight out of the academy, top of my class, and now I am in one of the top federations. I thought this was it. I made it. Now the world will know who I was. I am not your average wrestler. That all these other wrestlers cannot hold a candle to me. And so there I was in the locker room getting ready when a group of veterans in the company came forward to talk with me.
"Hey, you are the new guy. I am surprised you did not come to meet with us first before getting ready for the match.”
“And why would I feel the need to do that? I do not feel the need to meet a couple of oldies who has no business wrestling in the ring. You are the dinosaurs of the past, and you need to step down.”
“Oh, is that so? So does that make you the future?”
“You best believe it.”
*They look at each other and then start laughing.*
“Well, confidence is a good thing. I hope you win your first match."
They kept laughing as they walked away.
"Coming at new guys and still trying to be relevant. How pathetic!" I whispered to myself as I keep my bag in the locker.
The first match in the company and I was excited. This was my chance to show the world that I was a future legend in the making. Well, what really happened was I had my ass handed to me. First match and I crashed and burned horribly. I went backstage, and I could hear the snickering from the veterans in the company.
“He is the next generation?”
“These new guys come into the company thinking they hang with us because they are young. But look what happened! They choke in the big stage.”
“What did he call us? Dinosaurs! Well, we dinosaurs are still dangerous than these puppies!”
Laughter ensued in the background as I try to navigate myself out of the locker room.
“I can’t believe this is happening!” I whispered under my breath as I stuff my things in my bag.
“Hey! You are the new guy!” I felt a hand on my shoulder. I remove it and turn around to see Martin.
“Saw your match out there. You were amazing!”
“Amazing? Are you mocking me? I lost. I know it. But it won’t happen again!”
“That’s the spirit! But it’s okay to lose. Relax—" I pushed past Martin and left the room.
I was angry that after all the training that I went through I just lost. I was the best in the academy but that did not mean shit here. You know, I regret that day now. That cocky little shit had no right to think and talk that way. I regret that was my first interaction with Martin, my predecessor.
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Fast forward to now, the present. I stand.
My legacy… tarnished.
My friend… dead.
My life… in ruins.
*Pandalike can be seen standing at the edge of a rooftop. The wind blows past him as he watches the city below him. The moon and stars’ light drowned by the city lights. Pandalike takes a deep breath and looks towards the moon*.
The first match in and I was worried history would repeat itself. That I would be again in the losing end but that was not the case. Guess experience does come in handy even if I haven’t wrestled for a while. *Pandalike chuckles*. I know what everyone is thinking. Who is this man? Pandalike? An animal? An animal spirit? Some comedian? It’s hard for people to take someone with an objectively funny name seriously. I understand that. But that’s the realm my friend Martin liked to operate in. He loved having a laugh and making people smile but also showed the badass that he was in the ring. That’s what made him unique. That’s what made him a legend. But now he is gone. Where does that leave me? What does that mean for the Pandalike name? What does that mean for me? Does that mean I will follow in his footsteps? Probably not. See, Pandalike originated from the idea of yin and yang. Light and Darkness. To have a balance for both. It’s neither good nor bad. It is what it is. I believe that describes me to the letter. I too am neither good nor bad. I cannot be put inside a box and have labels on me. No.
So, why do I this? If not to be entertaining or for being the best, why do I wrestle? Well, you are not going to like the answer to that question. I am doing it for the money. Poverty-stricken; That’s what I am after not working for the last 5 years. Right now, I am barely holding on. I can’t make rent or pay bills. Running around from one place to another, trying to find someone to sign me. See I understand now what I did not understand back then. It is okay to have passion and the drive to be at the top but don’t be surprised to find yourself on your back hearing the bell go ding-ding. Don’t be surprised that there are others with different motivations but just as justifies as yours, to be in that ring, to win. Back then I thought having passion was all you needed to succeed. That effort and passion are all you need to become the best. I was dead wrong. Right now, I understand why those men thought my words were childish. That trying to upstage veterans was stupid. Because right now, I am just an average man trying to make that coin, I am an average man trying to make rent, put food on the table. I am an average man trying to find a place to belong. I understand the struggle of just trying to live. You see, my motivation for doing this is not passion nor glory. My motivation for wrestling is a borderline necessity. I wrestle to be paid. Matches I win, I get paid. Championships pay even more. I am sorry but to some, this might sound obscure and greedy; however, we live in a cruel world where money talks and after not working for 5 years, I am hungry. I am so very hungry. Right now, I can see an opportunity to have steak tomorrow. To have fine wine in what would be my new fancy apartment. *Pandalike closes his eyes and smiles* Oh! The dreams I see are so fancy! I want to live in that dream. I want to make my dreams a reality and a championship belt can make that happen.
*Pandalike opens his eyes and he watches the city below*.
I know. I am dangerously close to sounding like that arrogant punk 10 years back who didn’t know any better. Don’t get me wrong. I do understand the odds here. This match is a clusterfuck. Way too many bodies but only one championship title. Yes, it’s a tag team match but does it really matter? Do you think just by adding “tag-team” we are going to have any sort of teamwork? No. The truth is there is going to be chaos. I am guessing this is Christian DeMarco’s specialty. Chaos and more chaos. But I can’t complain. An opportunity for the title in the very second match of me being in this company… is the kind of chaos I can get behind.
*Pandalike takes a deep breath and then sighs*
But truth to be told I know what everyone is thinking about me in this situation. “He is the underdog” or “He is the dark horse”. Under-dog. That’s probably the word that I hated the most throughout my career. It’s a fancy way of calling someone a loser. The man who has the “potential” to win but never really does. “Oh! He was so close!” “Oh! If he had hooked both his legs, he would’ve been the winner”. Excuses after excuses made on your behalf but it all felt like a slap on my face. A constant reminder that I just didn’t cut it. And then we have the “Dark Horse”. Another one of those tags thrown at me. What does that mean? It means we don’t know shit about him, and you can probably ignore him! *Pandalike laughs* Truth is I understand my position. Pandalike wears a mask. Pandalike just had one match. Pandalike has not done many appearances. This man is a mystery. Why should I care about him? Why should I have any reason to believe he is going to win this match? He is the new guy here. I get it. But then again, why not? There are no rules that dictate that you need to know me to win, that the new guy cannot win this, and that I have no right to believe that I can win this. Here is the truth. When that bell rings everyone in that ring will be a target and that includes Lesley and Mason. This isn’t just some championship match for me. This is the moment where I reach out and take what’s mine. You see, I am after that steak. What? You thought that steak was imaginary? No. I want that damn steak! I want to bite into it as I feel the meat melt inside my mouth. I want to go to my fancy apartment and lie on my bed that’s so soft that it almost feels like I am sinking within it. I want the pain and the struggle to stop. I want it all and as I act upon my sin of greed, and I will enact my sin of wrath on those eleven competitors for that title. And then finally, FINALLY, I will ascend to that dream…That dream of warmth and security. And actually, be a champion!