Post by Savannah Sunshine. on May 4, 2021 21:28:32 GMT -5
DATE: Saturday, May 1st, 2021
TIME: Sometime in the late evening
LOCATION: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
“You always taught me to be good and always do my best to be selfless. But, I know that God is holding you and I am so damn jealous. 'Cause I miss your arms around me and the way you make me laugh. And now I'm stuck inside this prison that says you're never coming back. And now I'm sitting in my room as I try to write this song. I'm so sorry that it's not good enough, it's just that everything seems wrong. But, I will try my best to be good. So, I can pave my way straight through the pearly gates. Into your arms so we can play once more.” The sounds of “I Won’t Say That I’m Okay” by Front Porch Step played through the speakers of the car. It’s hard to focus, to remember how to breathe, to think. Everything had happened so fast, in fact, she had gotten on the first flight back home when her mother had called her. As she comes to a complete stop in the parking lot, fingers shake as they rest against the steering wheel. Hands dropping into her lap a moment later as her forehead rests against the steering wheel a moment later.
The news had hit her like a ton of bricks. Her grandmother had passed away just a few days ago. Something that she was still coming to grips with, even as she sat in the parking lot of the funeral home. She inhaled several calming breaths, almost jumping when someone knocked at her window. Her grandfather stood there, a soft smile on his lips, even knowing he was burying his wife today. It took everything in her to keep it together as she removed her seat belt and stepped out of the car. Arms immediately engulfing the large male who stood at a looming six feet, three inches. Arms immediately wrapped around her as face buried into him, sniffling softly as she pulled away to properly look up at him. “I’m so sorry, grandpa. I should have been here. I’ve been so busy lately and I just…” She’s cut off as he engulfs her in another tight hug, pulling away a moment later as his hands rest softly upon her shoulders. One hand shifts to lightly wipe away tears that slide down her cheeks. A gentle gesture full of love and care as he carefully takes one of her hands, gentle kiss pressed to knuckles.
“No time to play the blame game, sweetheart. Let’s get in here and do what we need to do for granny.” There’s a gentle stillness as the pair walk into the funeral home together. It’s already packed, full of faces familiar and less familiar. Faces that are family, friends, even some co-workers who had flown out at the last minute to be there to support her in her time of need. She inhales a steady breath, greeting faces around her, shaking hands, hugging people. It felt like forced reactions, on her behalf anyway, because half of these people were here to show grievances. Majority of these people didn’t know her granny like she did. Her granny was her very best friend, someone who knew her from the inside all the way to the outside. She was her backbone, the person who had forced her to continue rehab after her neck injury. She had been the one to push her to get back in the ring, even when she was so afraid of getting back into it. She believed in her when no one else would and she knew that she would always be watching over her. That’s just the kind of person her grandmother was.
Hours had gone by since they had finished burying the casket. The long line of folks that had shown up to show their grievances and support had dispersed. She was left with her grandfather once everyone else had left, the pair seated on a bench a few feet away from where her grandmother was now buried. There’s a silence that falls over them as they sit there, Savannah standing to dump one last pile of dirt atop the pile. A handful scooped up into her hand and slowly ran through her fingers before she dusted her hands off on her black skirt. Shaky breath is slowly exhaled as he leans down for a moment, hand gently patting the pile of dirt stacked neatly atop the plot. She sniffles, back of her hand wiping at tears that spill down her cheeks. It’s hard to keep it together any longer, hard to force herself to not cry whenever someone says they’re sorry for her loss. Whenever her mother sobs openly when people hug her or air their grievances to her. Or the way her grandfather forces sad smiles onto his face throughout the service. It’s all so much to handle.
“She loved you, you know?” Her grandfather’s voice pipes up and it just barely breaks her from her reverie. Tears still fill her eyes and slide down her cheeks as she nods a bit. “You were her first grandchild, her pride and joy. When your ma’ couldn’t handle being a single parent, she came home and we helped pick up the pieces your… I guess you can call him a father.” His eyes roll slightly, slowly standing to his feet with a low hum. He walks over to his granddaughter, hands resting on her shoulders softly. “I love you. So much. We all do and you’re not alone in your pain. Trust me, I might look like I’m okay. But, as soon as I get home to an empty bed?” He chokes up, swallowing the lump in his throat as he pulls her in for a tight hug. The hug reciprocated as tears flowed freely down her cheeks, it took them a long while before they finally pulled apart. Sniffling and wiping at their own faces with a gentle laugh.
There’s a beat between them, silence as they stare at one another. “I love you too. The both of you. I just hope I’m making you guys proud. I’m trying my best, really. Some days are harder than others, lately it feels like the world is against me. But, when I know that I have so many people backing me and supporting me?” She pauses, a small smile crossing her lips. “It makes me feel like I can do anything. Like I can push forward no matter what. No matter the obstacles. No matter the pain. I just have to keep fighting until I get to where I want and need to be.” She nods firmly, the pair sharing one last hug as her grandfather ruffles her hair. A small pout crossing her features as the elder man chuckles softly, kiss placed to her cheek.
“We’re always proud of you, darling. Always. Now, it’s time for this old man to get home and get some sleep. If your mother will let me sleep.” He chuckles, the two squeezing one another one final time. “I love you, kiddo. You can do anything as long as you keep at it. Always. Never forget it.” He steps away, one hand lightly pressing to his hand in a kiss before he pats the tombstone placed at the front of the plot where his wife is now buried. With one final glance at the words, he turns his back towards the grave and walks away towards his car. Savannah watching until he’s out of sight and she’s left alone in solitude. Her back turned momentarily towards the grave before she slowly turned around to face it once more. The flowers that she had since settled onto the bench were picked up into her hands, as she walked over towards the grave.
“Hi, granny. I’m not going to take up too much of your time anymore. I just wanted a little one on one chat is all. I’m glad you’re not in pain anymore and I’m so thankful to have had the time I had with you.” She can feel tears stinging her eyes once more, eyes closing briefly as she settles the bundle of flowers right over top of the pile of dirt. “I wish I had just one more minute with you. A measly second to tell you how much I love you. I know you can’t talk back to me, so I’ll say it now. Thank you.” She pauses, licking over her lips. “Thank you for being the best woman I know. Well, not counting ma’. Ma’s great, but she had to learn that from someone, eh?” There’s a gentle laugh that spills from her lips before she continues. “You’ll always be my biggest fan, granny. I love you so much. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you. I’ve got a pretty big challenge ahead of me this week, but I know I’ll have my own guardian angel watching over me. I’m gonna make you so proud, grams. I promise you. I won’t let you down.” She presses a kiss to her index and middle fingers, pressing them against the dirt pile for a moment. “I’ll see you later, old lady.” She grins cheekily, wiping stray tears from her eyes as she turns to walk away and back to her car. Just like that, the day is over and it’s time to head out for the show. No turning back, no questions asked. A renewed fire lit within her very veins to go out there and do what she does best: Kick some major ass.
DATE: Tuesday, May 4th, 2021
TIME: Sometime in the late evening
LOCATION: Some Hotel, Brasilia, Brazil
The camera focuses on one Savannah Sunshine, who sports her best Leia pigtails in honor of May The Fourth Day. The sounds of “Nightmare” by Halsey plays low in the background, the lyrics popping up finally. “I've tasted blood and it is sweet. I've had the rug pulled beneath my feet. I've trusted lies and trusted men. Broke down and put myself back together again. Stared in the mirror and punched it to shatters. Collected the pieces and picked out a dagger. I've pinched my skin in between my two fingers. And wished I could cut some parts off with some scissors. "Come on, little lady, give us a smile". No, I ain't got nothin' to smile about. I got no one to smile for, I waited a while for. A moment to say I don't owe you a goddamn thing.” There’s a brief moment as Savannah dances around to the music, trying to settle herself down as she takes a seat on the window sill, one leg crossing over the other as her head tilts slightly. Gaze focused towards the camera as she raised one hand, fingers wiggling towards the camera with a small smile.
“Well, hi guys. We’re back at it again this week so let me take a moment to collect my thoughts. It seems two out of the three opponents I have had a lot to say. But, make no goddamn mistake about it… You don’t know a damn thing about me.” She stretches out, long Star Wars t-shirt going right down to her knees. “If you don’t want to see me interacting with my boyfriend on your timeline, you could simply mute or block us. It’s that simple, darling.” Grin crosses her lips, almost sickeningly sweet as she clears her throat.
“I am sick and tired of everyone having something to say about my relationship based off of what they see on some silly little social media site. You don’t get to sit here and flap those big gums on your plastic body because you’re upset about something so small. If you have a problem with how my relationship is going, that kind of sounds like a personal problem. I’m quite satisfied where I am, I’m happy and content and as far as I’m concerned? That’s all that matters. Anything else is beyond your business and you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. So, don’t sit here and think for one miserable second of your life that you know anything about me based off of what you see on Twitter, honey. It’s one thing to sit here and talk about business, the things that happen inside of the ring. But, to bring personal issues into things is beyond in ring business. But, hey! What do I know, right?!”
Eyes roll, clear agitation showing on her features. If there’s one thing she hates, it’s when people drag personal lives into the ring. “You can talk about my relationship all you want and you’ll all still be wrong. But, it’s entirely another issue to bring my son into this shit when he isn’t involved in any of this bullshit you’re spewing. You have an issue with me? That’s your problem. But, you leave my goddamn kid out of this!” Brows knit together in frustration, teeth biting down on the inside of her cheek hard enough to draw blood. She’s beyond tired of this petty drama Kayla seems to want to dig up. Beyond tired of Kayla running her mouth when she doesn’t know a damn thing about her. Beyond tired of everyone using the fact that she’s dating Jason as some sort of crutch to disrespect her. “For your information, sweetheart… I didn’t come here to chase some man around. I came here of my own free will because I wanted to be here. Because I was recommended to check things out by a few friends. Jason has nothing to do with this, so you keep your filthy little mouth shut because I don’t take too kindly to dumb broads who drag shit on for no reason.”
Clearly, she has no time for niceties this time around. In fact, she’s pretty upset at everything being said. When most of it is mere personal issues that people are dragging into things. Cool, they have an issue with her relationship. That’s not her problem, that’s their problem and it’s more than frustrating for her to have to constantly defend herself when everyone has the same shit to say every single time. “You guys seriously need to come up with new material already. Go read a book, watch literally any of my matches instead of making personal attacks. Seriously, what are we in high school? Get over yourselves.”
She pauses, taking a moment to calm herself down, exhale, inhale. The motion repeated at least five times before she shakes her head. “I’m sorry, I’m just so tired of this same song and dance. For the past several times I have been on this show, all anyone has had to say is personal attacks towards my life and my relationship and I have had it up to here of having to repeat myself time and time again. It’s time for all of you to grow the hell up and get over yourselves. No one wants to hear the same shit repeated to them every single time they have to go up against someone.” There’s a brief moment of darkness flashing across her features, but she merely brushes it aside before continuing on.
“I am tired of people talking to me anyway they please. I am tired of people making baseless claims as if they know anything at all about my career or what I am capable of. You don’t get to discredit me by claiming I don’t deserve the chances I have been given. I have earned my place here, I have made a name for myself and I will not stop fighting until every obstacle in my way is knocked down like a stack of dominoes. I’m not always the nice girl, especially in times like this. Especially when so much animosity is thrown my way for merely existing and knowing that my mere existence pisses some of you off? Oh, I love that. That just means I need to work harder until you leave me the hell alone.” She licks over her lips, takes a moment to release some tension in her neck as she rolls her head from one side to the next. Gentle sigh of relief falling from her lips as she smirks slightly.
“For the record, I didn’t break my neck. Do I have previous injuries? Yeah. But, that wasn’t what happened. But, you’re free to test that out for yourself if you’re so eager, honey. In fact, I welcome it because it gives me all the more reason to kick your ass and prove to you that I am not going to merely play nice because it’s what you expect me to do. There has been no one who has spoken thus far that has earned my respect. I’ve merely been handed disrespect by everyone who has had anything to say to me. So, niceties are tossed out of the window without a single care. So, now you get a side of me that I absolutely hate to show. But, it is what it is and this is what you get.” Fingers settle into her lap, trying to distract herself from how worked up she is. She’s angry, she’s fed up, and she just wants to be in the ring already to silence all doubts anyone claims they have on her.
“There is no sad life story. No tears to shed. In fact, I just wanted to become a wrestler because I enjoyed watching other people live their dreams. I loved seeing everyone willing to put their bodies on the line to entertain others. Which is exactly what I did. I started on the independent scene, made a name for myself, then got to the big leagues as they say. I didn’t need anyone to coddle me and hold my hand along the way and I never have. You all keep saying you’re not counting me out, but yet give backhanded compliments and disrespect thrown towards me. Which means I am left with no choice than to make sure you swallow your words. Literally. By any means necessary, I will make sure I leave my mark at the end of all of this. Win or lose, I am not walking away a sore loser. I am walking away with my head held high and possibly my hand raised in victory. Which would be the icing on the cake with so many doubters behind me. But, that’s exactly what I expect.” She shifts, standing up as she moves to sit down cross legged in front of the camera. The camera focuses on her once again as she leans back on her hands a bit to get comfortable.
“This is exactly the chance I need to prove that I am not just sunshine and rainbows. I am not here to just sit here and let some man hold my hand and follow him like a lost little puppy. I am forging my own path and whether that path is made of blood, sweat, and tears? That is my choice. So far, it’s been a constant uphill battle save for one loss. From here on out, I’m making sure I go out there and I give it my all no matter what. It’s about time I start showing everyone what I am truly capable of. It’s time to show my true colors and really start leaving a mark on everyone who steps up to the plate. Game on, ladies.” A grin crosses her lips, sickeningly sweet. Too sweet. As the scene soon fades to darkness with the last scene nothing but Savannah smiling.
